Like I say, Christmas is all very well - coming once a year. But who wants to make a habit of it? Like that old guy.
It happened just a few minutes ago. I caught this young kid in my garden - pinching figs. Caught him red handed. Told him he was cop bait and no mistake. He sniffed and said his mother couldn’t afford fruit.
That was all very well. But they were my figs - not that I eat them myself. Can’t stand the stuff.
“You think it’s Christmas? ” I yell at the kid.
“It should be,” says this old guy who pops up. Out of nowhere! “Christmas is a state of heart. For every day of every year,” he says. “If it was, life would be worth living again.” Handed me a R10 note, “for the figs”, he says. Then he vanishes.
I still have the note. But he was gone. Did you see him? A funny, stout man in a red suit, long white beard. Who the hell does he think he is?
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