All Rights Reserved 穢


A/N: This chapter contains mature content. Read at your own risk or skip ahead.

Finally, our little adventure came to an end when we reached the hotel. Right when we were about to wrap up and call it a night, I was hit with a sudden realisation. "Shit! I don't have the keys to the hotel room." I facepalmed. The initial plan was for the both of us to return to the hotel by the time the gala was over at around one am. It was already past eleven when Matthew and I had arrived.

"You can always chill with me in my room while you wait." He offered.

"Oh, no! I can never. It's been a long night and I'm pretty sure you need to rest." I politely declined.

"And I'm pretty sure you don't want to spend the next few hours waiting for Maren." He reasoned. "It's no hassle. I don't mind the company."

I bit my lip, calculating my option until I eventual relented and took the offer.

His room was similar to the deluxe room Maren and I shared. The only difference was it had one queen sized bed. "Make yourself comfortable." He said as we entered the room. I quickly took off my heels and threw myself on the couch and massaged my sore feet. I could survive hours wearing heels, but they were a pain in the ass to wear nonetheless if they were going give my feet blisters.

"Do you want anything to drink?" he asked.

"I'm good thanks." I smiled, taking off his jacket and neatly placed it on the table. "I really had a good time."

"It is supposed to be a 'happy birthday'."

"Yeah but my birthday isn't exactly my favourite time of the year."

"How come?"

"It's just the same thing every year. A year is added to my life. My dad, grandmother and sister give me unnecessary attention..."

"What about your mother?" I looked at him. "You only mentioned your father, grandmother and sister but not your mother." He recalled.

My smile faltered a little, but I quickly forced it back on. "She's not really in the picture. She died when I was really young." I told him. "I didn't know up until I was thirteen when I found her death certificate with her name and my birthdate on it."

I could tell what he was thinking, or rather what he wanted to say but kept his mouth shut knowing that he was going to come off as an insensitive asshole.

She died giving birth to you. It was quite evident in the pity in his eyes. I let out a bitter laugh. "You don't have to feel sorry for me. It's life. People die all the time."

"Yes...but it did affect you growing up, didn't it?"

"I mean, I was pissed at my dad for lying about her travelling around the world whenever asked if she was ever coming home and finding every letter, I ever wrote to her tied up and put away in her study."

I didn't know why I was telling him all that nor did I understand why I did so in the first place. We weren't that close and there were some limits and boundaries I wasn't sure I wanted to cross. Not to forget, the subject about my mother was too sensitive for me to even talk about with Maren despite how close we were. But for some reason, he was easy to talk to about these things and I felt I could trust him to open up about something that had been bothering me for the greater part of my life.

"So yeah. My birthday is my least favourite of the year because it's a constant reminder that I basically murdered my mom."

"It wasn't your fault."

I shrugged. "It feels like it."

"You can't blame yourself over something that was beyond your control. I'm pretty sure she would have preferred she died instead of you because she loved you that much."

"But the thing is, I don't love her." I said, surprising him. "Not that I hold any resentment towards her. It's just..." I trailed off. "I can't love someone I don't know or someone who never existed in my life. My mom is just a ghost. I can't even miss her because I have no reason to. I'm not attached to my mother the same way the rest of my family is, and I hate it.

"I can't even bring myself to go visit her grave without feeling like I don't deserve to be there and not knowing what to say to her. I can't even say what I feel about how her absence in my life as affected me to my family without sounding like a bitch." I said.

There was a deafening silence. I could see that Matthew was trying to find words to make the situation better when he was biting his lip as he stared intently at me after what I had told him. "I don't really have anything to say nor am I in any position to say anything to make it better," he said honestly. "but I still stand by my point that what happened to your mother isn't your fault. You shouldn't beat yourself up that you feel that way. I actually respect you a whole lot more than I can give credit for your honesty, really."

I stared at him, squinting my eyes at him. "What?" he let out an awkward smile.

"You confuse me." I told him.

"What's so confusing about me?"

"You always seem to see the good in every shitty situation."

It was one of the things I noticed about him even before we started talking. I always found it odd how he always managed to find a silver lining to every situation that was close to being hopeless.

"I consider myself realistically optimistic." He answered. "If I see that something has the potential of having a good outcome, I see it that way and I make sure to make it that way."

After that, no words we said. We just sat there being consumed by the silence, looking at each other, completely ignoring our surroundings. It was then when I started to see Matthew. Like really see him. I never knew he had such beautiful hazel grey eyes, such flawless light skin, full lips, elegantly bushy eyebrows and a mesmerising English accent as he spoke. I liked how his eyes would crinkle and gleam whenever he smiled. I liked how his face would light up whenever he talked about his work or anything, he was passionate about. He was a beautiful man and his personality made his look so ethereal. It surprised me how I started noticing and appreciating these things about him right there in that moment. Things that I had completely overlooked.

I didn't realise how close we were until I felt his breath fan against my lips. Next thing I knew, his lips were pressed against mine. It was an innocent kiss. No tongue involved, just a kiss. Subtle and slow but a very innocent kiss. I was taken back by the action, but I didn't stop him. I knew I had to put a stop to it, but I couldn't. I didn't want to. So I let him kiss me.

When he did eventually pull away, we didn't say a word. There wasn't any need to. The swirl of emotion in his eyes; the desire and lust burning in his eyes surprised me and I suddenly felt bare and vulnerable. I hated it but I loved it at the same time.

He leaned in again and closed the gap between our lips. This time he slowly but skilfully moved his lips against mine and I found myself giving in and following the rhythm of his lips. I closed my eyes and sighed. He placed his hand on my neck, tilted my head so he could have a better feel of my lips and press them harder against his as he deepened the kiss. Soon, what started as an innocent and soft kiss became rough, heated and fervorous. My body started heating up and my head started to become lighter. Our breaths became more rushed and laboured.

He pulled me by the waist, without breaking the kiss, to his lap, straddling him in the process. My hands were now in his dark hair and his hands were roaming up my back going down to squeeze my ass. His hands went up my back again and found the zipper of my dress. Swiftly, he pulled it down and let the dress slip from my shoulders to my waist, leaving me in my purple lace bra.

We pulled away catching our breaths. I got off his lap and stripped the rest of my dress. He stood up as well and took off his shirt and his trousers. He moved closer to me and closed the gap between us, wrapping is arms around my small waist.

I like how his body felt against mine. I liked the way he smelled. He wasn't tall. He was about the same height as me if not taller by an inch, but I liked it that way. I liked how he picked me up effortlessly and wrapped my legs around his waist as he carried me before laying me down to the bed softly. I liked how he removed my glasses and placed them on the nightstand.

I blinked a few times to adjust my vision and have a good look at him due to my short sighted vision. I reached for his face and caressed with my thumbs. He dipped his head and started putting kisses on my neck.

My body tensed a bit, unfamiliar with these new and foreign sensation rippling through my body. Eventually, I relaxed and closed my eyes, listening to his breathing and focusing on the feeling of his lips against my skin. I gasped and moaned when I felt him bite my sweet spot, a spot I never knew I had, and I found myself grinding my hips against him.

He took off my bra, my knickers and his boxers.

He moved his lips across my jaw going down my neck to my bare breasts. I sucked in the air and let out a loud mewl when he flicked his tongue against my nipple. I cried out, aching my body into a curve begging and craving for more.

He stopped and looked down at me. He stroked my hair and kissed me softly and gently this time. I sighed into the kiss mimicking his movement. The I felt him enter inside me, stretching out my core. My whole body jolted up, throwing my arms around his shoulders and let out a muffled cry in his neck. He was really big, and he was only half way in.

"It's okay. I got you." He whispered in my ear. I held on to him for dear life, letting out a small cry until he was all the way inside. 'You okay?"

"Mhm." I nodded vigorously as I slowly laid back on the bed.

Slowly and gently, he started moving. My breaths grew louder and heavier until the turned into vocal cries mixed with moans. He placed his forehead against mine, his breath fanning against my lips. I stared at him with hooded eyes that would close occasionally as I drowned deeper into the pool of pleasure. I dug my nails into his skin causing him and his and groan whenever I dragged them down his back.

We shared a kiss and our bodies continued dancing against each other.

Continue Reading Next Chapter

About Us

Inkitt is the worlds first reader-powered publisher, providing a platform to discover hidden talents and turn them into globally successful authors. Write captivating stories, read enchanting novels, and well publish the books our readers love most on our sister app, GALATEA and other formats.