This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.
The secret behind fear, ennui and the general
malaise that borders, sometimes spills over into,
joylessness cannot be healed with prozac or
television. Not for us. The secret goes beyond
these tissue walls. Beyond this breath. The secret
is that you are, in fact, not on your true home planet.
I’m quite sure our home isn’t even a planet.
This blue globe in the brackish backwater
of the Milky Way is one of uncountable planets used
for karmic restoration. Soul workshops. Excellent mud
baths for the body and the mind.
Not here to tell you how to tune your aura & get fit like Gandhi.
Not out to sell chakra knives guaranteed to cut through a can of negative vibes.
Not here to teach you the 30 day tantric orgasm.
I would do that, though, if I could.
I know, I know, we’ve never met.
We’ve passed each other on the street.
Sometimes even fearful.
We’re all very busy.
But you are human, like me.
My dog is pissed at me.
Our life together: walking.
Racing alongside my bicycle.
She loves to talk trash.
Riding on the motorcycle gas tank.
Frisbee: her art.
Can’t keep my balance on bikes anymore.
She’s had a bum leg for years.
It could go out anytime on a high jump or glorious sprint.
Suck it up. She says.
Play! She says. Ride, bitch!
Michelle said Jip-C’s motto was no pain, no gain.
High squeals when the leg goes bad.
Limping back to me
Her smile’s prisoner: a slathered bloody disc.
Throw it again! She barks.
I’m in a groove! She snorts.
I fear sudden helplessness. Crumpling.
My right leg: a ghost of aching bones.
Torso crushed in an invisible vise.
Spasms. Shudders. Exhaustion. WTF. LOL.
Many years ago I was helping my Grandmother with errands. I insisted she walk up several stairs to her bank, instead of the ramp. She did it with difficulty and resentment.
Now my lack of compassion shames me.
Is there a dream you’ve had your whole life.
More than one?
Dreams so familiar and clear.
Walking through tall grasses. Across sand. Over slippery rocks. Dark woods.
Canopy freckles the air.
Dogs, cats, deer, raccoons. Birds. Others.
I feel them around me.
Drawings on my hands and feet.
I am protected. I am protection.
In between our quarks and etched in the membranes of our atoms are the very first dreams.
A great storm fills the horizon.
It stretches through time.
Beyond it an older woman beckons me.
Vital details lost upon waking.
Sabrina and I were 4.
I would turn her hands over and back, again and again.
Marveling at the meridian between the palm and the back of her hand.
A line where pink faded to deep chocolate.
She was Beauty.
She lived several blocks away.
Doors open, no one home.
Almost to the jar when the screen door slammed.
A dark man I didn’t know.
He had a deep voice, an odd accent.
He spoke softly at first, his tone almost friendly.
Red and brown swirling around his head.
He shut the inside door and came closer.
He smelled of sweat, piss, alcohol and shit.
(Upset about the cookies!)
He has me. I keep trying to get up. I have no control over my body. I am a rag doll.
His penis has white and green ooze. Musky rot.
Forces into my mouth: gag. Vomit.
It covers him, re-ignites the Rage.
Skin ripping as he shoves himself into me.
My anus stings as if it were burnt.
Kicks me in the crotch.
The screen door slams.
I cannot move.
My skin, bones and ribs ache. I feel tears roll down my face but I am not crying.
A small plane passes lazily overhead.
I am terrified of being found.
Unsure if Sabrina’s mom or my mom sent him because of the cookies.
Can’t move. Made of lead and pain.
Please help me.
I call to the plane, to the birds.
It seems as if I passed out.
Suddenly I was aware of being surrounded.
A group of golden figures, crouched over me.
Reaching into me.
Stroking my forehead, rubbing my back, my stomach.
The pain, accentuated by every pulse of blood, decreases.
I feel warmth.
They soothe my pain. Numb the terror in my heart.
It seems as if I came to.
Mom says I acted perfectly normal for about ten minutes and then broke down. She changed my clothes, washed my face and called the police.
They came and asked questions. Didn’t examine my body. Everyone smiles and talks quietly but I can’t hear them, I barely could see them.
When I finally found myself again it was dark and I was alone in the house, still sitting on the couch wrapped in a blanket.
I lie on my back. Above, in the murk of the dark room, there is a small glowing light. The pinprick grows into a disk. The disk becomes a sun, then a face, then a hand reaching for me. I close my eyes but when I open them it is still there and has become a small glowing figure. It fills me with indescribable comfort and I fall asleep without realizing, wanting to keep my eyes on the image forever.
Predators were common on the island.
CornflowerBlues: I'm liking everything about this story so far: the brazen detective, the way he gave in to temptation, the temptation (<3!!), and the unexpectedly complex backdrop of his job and the case he's working. The story is well written, and despite its erotica tag, has an intriguing detective story and a...
Lydia Sherrer: I first read The Speaker almost a decade ago when I first discovered author Sandra Leigh. I loved it then, and I still love it now. It is a simple, easy read, yet deep in meaning and rich in storyline. I do not know what kind of research or prior knowledge Leigh has of First Nation tribes, but sh...
Jacklyn Reynolds: As a mother of an Autistic child, I know how hard it can be. I love how beautiful you made everything. That's all I can say. I need to grab a tissue.
Sammi Chan: THIS WAS AMAZING!!! My favorite part of this story was the slow build of Merlin and Arthur's relationship. Their relationship was rlly nicely fleshed out and so good :) The way that you handled the magic reveal was super enjoyable. I rlly liked the switching POVs. Good!Mordred was cute and I'm rl...
KC_Ward: Black Mark was one of the most interesting romance novels I have read. I really enjoyed the fact that Mora has such a strong character and held her ground. Each character had a background story that gave clues as to what shaped their personalities. This novel was almost like two books rolled into...
Tanell Moore: Charming and completely relatable. I am Elle - the reluctant hopeless romantic in a dead end relationshit, unknowingly looking for love and a real connection. Tastefully written and overall well done! Simply loved it and quite sad to see it end. :)Thank you!
Alykitty18: There were some errors in spelling, his instead of hers in some places but other than that it was a different sort of tale of happen stance that I adored. I love how Jame's mother came into the story and was pleased once she was part of everything, loved the comment about the grandchildren! And t...
Bboyjoon: A brilliant but unsettling story about 5 murders committed by a serial killer. This novel scared me a little bit and I have to commend you for being able to do that. I wanted to know if you’ve actually met a serial killer before. I mean the way you’ve described the mind of a psychopath is extreme...
sujitha nair: What's so distinct about this story was that it could easily be real. Praveena can be your classmate, neighbor or that girl you saw at the coffee shop today. The important decisions she makes and the dilemmas she faces, remind us of our own twisted lives.
Lacey Schmidt: The Trouble with Super is that you can't stop reading it. Mr. Barrett's characters are all to easy to relate to even if you don't have a super quirk of your own, and their plight is both heart-rendingly funny and heart-warmingly sad at the same time. It's a bit like Office Space meets the Matri...
farziex3: I think this novel is perfect because it had erotic, romance, and towards the end was a twist so I was just on the edge of my seat reading this book. It was honestly really amazing. I haven't found a book I actually liked to read for almost 2-3 years and this was a great book to start off. Makes ...
ryder: This is an excellent read. From beginning to end the author showed his creative and imaginative writing skills. Twists and turns, surprises, humor, and sorrow: This book has it all. I strongly recommend this book, and I am already recommending it to my friends.