This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.
The secret behind fear, ennui and the general
malaise that borders, sometimes spills over into,
joylessness cannot be healed with prozac or
television. Not for us. The secret goes beyond
these tissue walls. Beyond this breath. The secret
is that you are, in fact, not on your true home planet.
I’m quite sure our home isn’t even a planet.
This blue globe in the brackish backwater
of the Milky Way is one of uncountable planets used
for karmic restoration. Soul workshops. Excellent mud
baths for the body and the mind.
Not here to tell you how to tune your aura & get fit like Gandhi.
Not out to sell chakra knives guaranteed to cut through a can of negative vibes.
Not here to teach you the 30 day tantric orgasm.
I would do that, though, if I could.
I know, I know, we’ve never met.
We’ve passed each other on the street.
Sometimes even fearful.
We’re all very busy.
But you are human, like me.
My dog is pissed at me.
Our life together: walking.
Racing alongside my bicycle.
She loves to talk trash.
Riding on the motorcycle gas tank.
Frisbee: her art.
Can’t keep my balance on bikes anymore.
She’s had a bum leg for years.
It could go out anytime on a high jump or glorious sprint.
Suck it up. She says.
Play! She says. Ride, bitch!
Michelle said Jip-C’s motto was no pain, no gain.
High squeals when the leg goes bad.
Limping back to me
Her smile’s prisoner: a slathered bloody disc.
Throw it again! She barks.
I’m in a groove! She snorts.
I fear sudden helplessness. Crumpling.
My right leg: a ghost of aching bones.
Torso crushed in an invisible vise.
Spasms. Shudders. Exhaustion. WTF. LOL.
Many years ago I was helping my Grandmother with errands. I insisted she walk up several stairs to her bank, instead of the ramp. She did it with difficulty and resentment.
Now my lack of compassion shames me.
Is there a dream you’ve had your whole life.
More than one?
Dreams so familiar and clear.
Walking through tall grasses. Across sand. Over slippery rocks. Dark woods.
Canopy freckles the air.
Dogs, cats, deer, raccoons. Birds. Others.
I feel them around me.
Drawings on my hands and feet.
I am protected. I am protection.
In between our quarks and etched in the membranes of our atoms are the very first dreams.
A great storm fills the horizon.
It stretches through time.
Beyond it an older woman beckons me.
Vital details lost upon waking.
Sabrina and I were 4.
I would turn her hands over and back, again and again.
Marveling at the meridian between the palm and the back of her hand.
A line where pink faded to deep chocolate.
She was Beauty.
She lived several blocks away.
Doors open, no one home.
Almost to the jar when the screen door slammed.
A dark man I didn’t know.
He had a deep voice, an odd accent.
He spoke softly at first, his tone almost friendly.
Red and brown swirling around his head.
He shut the inside door and came closer.
He smelled of sweat, piss, alcohol and shit.
(Upset about the cookies!)
He has me. I keep trying to get up. I have no control over my body. I am a rag doll.
His penis has white and green ooze. Musky rot.
Forces into my mouth: gag. Vomit.
It covers him, re-ignites the Rage.
Skin ripping as he shoves himself into me.
My anus stings as if it were burnt.
Kicks me in the crotch.
The screen door slams.
I cannot move.
My skin, bones and ribs ache. I feel tears roll down my face but I am not crying.
A small plane passes lazily overhead.
I am terrified of being found.
Unsure if Sabrina’s mom or my mom sent him because of the cookies.
Can’t move. Made of lead and pain.
Please help me.
I call to the plane, to the birds.
It seems as if I passed out.
Suddenly I was aware of being surrounded.
A group of golden figures, crouched over me.
Reaching into me.
Stroking my forehead, rubbing my back, my stomach.
The pain, accentuated by every pulse of blood, decreases.
I feel warmth.
They soothe my pain. Numb the terror in my heart.
It seems as if I came to.
Mom says I acted perfectly normal for about ten minutes and then broke down. She changed my clothes, washed my face and called the police.
They came and asked questions. Didn’t examine my body. Everyone smiles and talks quietly but I can’t hear them, I barely could see them.
When I finally found myself again it was dark and I was alone in the house, still sitting on the couch wrapped in a blanket.
I lie on my back. Above, in the murk of the dark room, there is a small glowing light. The pinprick grows into a disk. The disk becomes a sun, then a face, then a hand reaching for me. I close my eyes but when I open them it is still there and has become a small glowing figure. It fills me with indescribable comfort and I fall asleep without realizing, wanting to keep my eyes on the image forever.
Predators were common on the island.
Lydia Sherrer: I first read The Speaker almost a decade ago when I first discovered author Sandra Leigh. I loved it then, and I still love it now. It is a simple, easy read, yet deep in meaning and rich in storyline. I do not know what kind of research or prior knowledge Leigh has of First Nation tribes, but sh...
jaslynnash2015: I absolutely loved the story from beginning to end and I loved following each of the characters throughout their journey! Very captivating although there were a few grammar errors, but very captivating still! Can't wait for book 2!
Bella_Lee_Taylor: the plot of the story is good and I can't wait to read the second book, but you need to check your grammar because as I was reading there were were important parts of the story some of the spelling and grammar were out of place and the way you you worded things can be better but I can see that th...
dd1226: I love reading about other countries and I think this story about Cambodia after Polpot creates awareness of the tragedy that happened there and the actions of the U.N. to hold elections. The heroine of the story is easy to relate to, a modern, middleaged woman looking for an adventure, wanting t...
Angel S. Adames Corraliza: Sensational! As a fan of superheroes, I have to say, you have a real winner of a story so far. I like that you made Allison a Wonder Woman expy, but kept her likable and relate-able in this first chapter. You showed us the Mother while also glancing at the Superhero, which I think is important to...
MissMadokaKaname: I was impressed and moved by this work. The characterization and dialog were strong, and really brought everyone in the story to life. Also, the setting was handled in a believable and compelling way. The story captured the complexities and pain of love, and also the harshness of living in such b...
ank1983: I really enjoyed this story and I read through it quickly. I found it very entertaining and some of your scenes were very well written and descriptive. Every time a chapter ended I couldn't wait to start the next chapter. What girl hasn't fantasized over a cute teacher at school?! The story did...
KC_Ward: Never A Choice beat any expectation I had when I started reading. I really enjoyed the plot of the story, and the twist at the end added something extra! There were some minor grammatical errors, but nothing that couldn't be easily tweaked. Worth the read! I do hope if there is a sequel that the ...
RedX9: I would love it if you would show how she is the bottom of the class. A paragraph alone isn't enough to show this.If she was such a screw up, how did she pass and graduate from the class. Are her teachers this lax that they would allow a screw up to graduate?I didn't understand the schooling syst...
FreakyPoet: "you made me laugh, made me cry, both are hard to do. I spent most of the night reading your story, captivated. This is why you get full stars from me. Thanks for the great story!"
Sara Joy Bailey: "Full of depth and life. The plot was thrilling. The author's style flows naturally and the reader can easily slip into the pages of the story. Very well done."