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Are You Straight or Are You Gay? Pick One

By Ruth Dempsey All Rights Reserved ©

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Chapter 1

“Are you straight or are you gay?”

This is something people ask themselves when they’re kids after they find out what the words mean. The question is usually answered very quickly as they start to develop feelings for people and discuss their crushes with their friends.

But what about the people who can’t join these conversations? What about the kids who don’t have any crushes to speak off? As all my friends go in a circle asking everyone to name their crush I sit awkwardly in silence dreading my turn.

“You can’t not like anyone. Why won’t you tell us who it is? Do we know them?”

The lies roll off my tongue. I make up stories of the perfect person from another school but they quickly get bored as the next person takes their turn. Maybe I’m just not ready to like anyone. Maybe when I’m a little older. But as the years go on I’m still lying about the same prince charming to avoid suspicion but the questions keep flowing.

“How come you’ve never kissed anyone? Why won’t you date them? Are you gay?”

People always have a one track mind. I get into a relationship to get people to leave me alone. To make the questions stop. But nothing ever changes. I still feel nothing. I just feel empty. My hands flinch away from theirs. Their lips feel wrong. They lose interest quickly and break up with me. I wasn’t interested in the first place.

“Are you straight or are you gay?” PICK ONE.

But what if you can’t pick one? What if you’re neither? What if you just can’t relate to your friends as they have multiple relationships and come back bragging about their sexual conquests? What if you’re not interested in sex even though it’s all anyone talks about?

Is there something wrong with me?

Why am I the only one who seems to feel like this? Why do I feel so different to my friends? How would they react if I told them? They refused to believe I didn’t like anyone when we were kids so why would they listen now?

In class we discuss relationships and sexuality. I already know all about straight and gay but what am I? It’s getting harder and harder to keep pretending I’m the same as everyone else. I can’t be the only one. Please tell me I’m not the only one.

I scroll through the internet and a word in a text post catches my eye.

“Asexual”

In the back of my mind I remember a biology lesson about strawberrys but that why would someone be talking about that? I stop to read the post.

“Asexuality refers to someone who doesn’t feel any sexual attraction to either gender. Demisexual refers to someone who only feels sexual attraction after forming a strong emotional bond with someone.”

Could this be it? The answer I’ve been searching for since I was a kid.

“Are you straight or are you gay?”

I am neither. I am in this gray area that no one ever talks about about. Even though no one ever gave the option.

Why did it have to take me so long to figure it out though? Why did I have to wait so long to discover these options? Why weren’t they discussed at school? Why did I have to be made feel alone and broken?

We’re ghosts. According to media we don’t exist. No one is aware that there are more than those limited options you’re given.

“Are you straight or are you gay?”

I say straight because I don’t want to have to explain myself. I don’t want to argue that it’s real. I know what I am. I no longer feel alone. There’s nothing wrong with me.

My confidence grows. I feel whole.

“Are you straight or are you gay?”

I am neither.

And that’s okay.

Write a Review Did you enjoy my story? Please let me know what you think by leaving a review! Thanks, Ruth Dempsey
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Sarah D: I absolutely adore this novel, it really tugs at the heart strings. I work with autistic young people and the way the story is told is unmistakably beautiful and is written in a why that deals with the subject of autism in the kindest manner I strongly recommend this to everyone.

shantai79: I like the sort little to no errors, but slow updates. I would like to read more from this author. I like the concept and plot and hope there is a sequel.

Loren Williams: This book was just wonderful. One of the best MC books out there. It was different, it wasn't violent like I expected it to be. It was halarious, full of love and very unique. In all it was a great read. All your books are.

Crystal Snow : At first the progression of the story was slow, so I was expecting it to be a boring book, but then that all changed. As I kept reading, I started to feel the emotions the author wanted me to feel. I cried. I cried throughout the entire book. The way that the author portrayed the feelings of the ...

KittyLove: It was a good story but it ended crap. In my opinion you cant end a story in the middle of no where. I found quite a bit of spelling mistakes and could tell that there was not a prof reader or that the author read through it again.

SparklingFireLife: SPOILER ALERTI don't think that Emmary should die at the end, maybe Addeck threaten her into going along. Other that that, ITS GREAT.

Judith Vrij-Peeren: Good story, I couldn't put it down, but I didn't like the end though. A little more info on Abelia's creation and the myths concerning her would be nice. Who are those plotting against Fin and his family. So many questions.We need a sequel!

John Davidson: I personely loved it i am an hi bread an its story line merrers my own live an i hope an pray that you heave us an part 2 of this stroye necas like i sade i merers my life to an frighiting t an now tjat you got my atenshon

shivanikedia18: Love this book ... love the character and how mysteriously they fall in love slowly as most of the book have mate concept so mostly they fall in love instantly .... this book shows how love in reality actually transpire within human or u can say in real world... Waiting for that part two of this ...

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bemewtyoutoo: Its very well written and I admire the fact that it describes the characters feelings and the scenes so well that its almost tangible. Its just amazing that a book is this good. Keep up the good work author. You earn yourself a loyal fan.

K.K ☆: This is beautiful! I love it so much, there was a bit of grammatical errors but it was worth it!

Martinez990: This story is very original and intriguing, it keeps you connected at all times. Very well put together and thought through. The style is captivating and intriguing.The author has done a really good job creating something that will attract the reader's attention.

pearlandglitter: Omg it's very sad. I will just cry rn. But overall it's a great book, even if I'm not a fan of angst myself. Very recommended

Jianne Harper: I loved it I mean it may not be completely perfect but life is not even in this story it have challenges but it was beautiful and I can’t wait for the continuation,I do hope it have one.

Olivia8Grace8: I love all of the drama and the plot twists.

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