Get Free Copy

100 free copies left

This novel is limited to 100 free copies due to its part in Inkitt’s Novel Contest.

0
Free copy left
You can read our best books
Anawrath would love your feedback! Got a few minutes to write a review?
Write a Review

A Venting Piece

By Anawrath All Rights Reserved ©

Other

Alone (draft)

I made my way to my room, dragging my feet while trying to keep the energy to even get there. Today had been a normal day. I woke up and complained about not wanting to go to school, joked around with my friends in lunch, and listened to music between classes like I always did. Which is why I had no idea why I felt like... nothing. 
I don't remember the exact moment it happened, but at some point in the school day I, or somebody else, must've said or done something to make me start to lose my grip on my happiness. I mean, it's not like I'm not used to this. This happens everyday, but I can normally fix myself right up or hide it easily before going someplace new or talking to someone. Today was different though. And nothing helped to make me get some feeling that wasn't self hate. The thought of food made me feel sick, my body refused to sleep, my computer refused to work, and I had no idea when my girlfriend would be getting online. 
I dropped my bag to the ground and faceplanted onto my bed, sighing quietly. 'My parents are at work and my brother is at a friends house.' I thought to myself. 'I'll be home alone for about 6 hours..' I replayed those thoughts over and over again. "Fuck." I finally spoke out loud. I pushed myself up and shut my door, locking it. Even if I was home alone, I didn't want to risk someone coming in and seeing the mental mess I knew I was about to become. With nothing else to do, I sat back down on my bed, back against the wall, and wrapped a blanket around myself. Despite it being somewhere in the 80's in my house, I was shivering cold.

I sat in silence for a couple minutes and tried to keep it that way, but nothing could stop the negative thoughts accumulating in my mind. 'You need to lose weight.' 'Your friends don't really like you.' 'You're annoying.' 'You could easily be replaced with someone, or just disappear, and no one would notice.'  These insults, and many others, repeated themselves, getting louder and worse the longer I sat there. "Shut up. Please. Nothing's even wrong?" I fought back by whispering to myself, but my thoughts were winning. I soon felt heat running down my cheeks and dripping off onto my blankets. At this point, I had just given up and sobbed. 'You talk too much anyways.' I shakily grabbed my iPod and let it play whatever song came on, trying to drown out my thoughts with music. And it kinda worked. The thoughts got quieter and so did my crying, until 'Still' by Ben Folds came on. I loved that song, but right now it just made my situation worse. I cried harder than I did before and it felt like something dark was smirking behind me and in my head.

I couldn't move at this point. 'You're going to get in trouble if you don't do something.' 'You have homework you need to do, unless you want to fail school this year.' 'Maybe your girlfriend will break up with you if you don't reply to her.' That's when everything went silent. I immediately stopped crying, thinking, making noise. All I did was breathe and replayed that last thought in my head. 'Reply to her.' Where had that come from? I never heard a notification go off. And yet, when I checked, there was one. Others had messaged me, asking for things, or letting me know about plans they wanted to make, but Shaydinn was the only one to just ask me how my day had been. I breathed a sigh of relief and messaged her back about the parts of school I could remember, and left out everything that had just happened for the past 2 hours. I was numb, which was better than feeling like shit, but I was able to make it seem like everything was okay. 
We talked and roleplayed for a bit. At some point I had gotten up, fixed up my silverish ponytail, and cleaned up my face. I was better at this point and pushed today's events into the very far back of my head. "I'm not sure how much more of this I can take." I stared at myself in the mirror. The grey bags under my eyes felt heavier and my, normally chocolate, eyes looked like bottomless pits. I sighed and went back to my room. I talked with Shaydinn until she finally went to sleep around 11:30, then continued to stay up till 2AM, before finally crashing from the numbness of today. 
Continue Reading Next Chapter
Chapters
1. Alone (draft)
Further Recommendations

Animeviewer: It is one of the best stories I've ever read. This story will have you riding a roller coaster of emotions and nearly dying to know what happens next.You will get very attached to the characters and in my case I relate well with some of their very traumatic or emotional experiences, Just Juliet f...

ank1983: I really enjoyed this story and I read through it quickly. I found it very entertaining and some of your scenes were very well written and descriptive. Every time a chapter ended I couldn't wait to start the next chapter. What girl hasn't fantasized over a cute teacher at school?! The story did...

AnnaLucia: This fanfiction has an amazing plot. It's very different from the books, yet the author still managed to keep the personalities the characters had in the books. Your Alec and Magnus still are themselves, even though you created a different plot where Bane had to seduce Lightwood to get informati...

bhodges11: I like the concept of the story, but there were things that I felt could use more detail. I like the back stories created, but was left wanting more from parts of the story. I like the cadence of the author's writing style - it was a very easy, enjoyable read. I felt like it ended on, not a cliff...

Patrick Johns: The Prince was an exciting read. I enjoyed the spoiled bratty protagonist and his drastic change through out the story. The world building was well though out and clear. The author did a great job painting a picture for the reader without having a map. I liked the connection to real life leaders....

Bella_Lee_Taylor: the plot of the story is good and I can't wait to read the second book, but you need to check your grammar because as I was reading there were were important parts of the story some of the spelling and grammar were out of place and the way you you worded things can be better but I can see that th...

milu: every chapter you find something new or you unravel a mystery.hatsoff to your writing style.the story revolves around the truth of abelia.we start each chapter hoping that atleast in this chapter we will find about the truth.it is that curiosity which draws us into reading this.

Alex Reltin: The way you build the world around the characters is amazing, and the way you get into the character's mind and make us feel for the characters through the entire story. There isn't much more I can say about this other than amazing! Are there going to be anymore updates any time soon?I also Vote...

johnksutherland: Very modern, and quite erotic. I write erotics myself, but from a strictly 'straight' point of view and not BDSM. I read the first story and skimmed the rest. The author's writing style is superb and very easy to read. The stories are simple and entertaining. I liked everything about it, and I a...

More Recommendations

Michael Hogan: If anyone would advise Lindsey Martin-Bower not to mix religion and politics, she would probably tell them to take a hike. This rollicking novella does just that. It considers the case of Yung Sung Gonne and his Universality Church and two young women trying to bring it down. Frustrated by the ru...

mrh: This interesting take on the Harry Potter series fascinated me from line one on. I am in love with this tale and its characters and cannot wait to read the next chapter. I look forward to more soon.When can I expect the next chapter? I am so excited to read it!

Bboyjoon: A brilliant but unsettling story about 5 murders committed by a serial killer. This novel scared me a little bit and I have to commend you for being able to do that. I wanted to know if you’ve actually met a serial killer before. I mean the way you’ve described the mind of a psychopath is extreme...

dapharoah69: I gotta hand it to you. This was a great read from start to finish. I am a big fan of witches, thanks to Anne Rice. The characters really reeled me in from the very first few chapters. You make reading fun.