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Forever

By Tralalalaci All Rights Reserved ©

Poetry

Forever

In the beginning we promised our forever's to each other...

Broken hopes and promises
Recurring dreams awake me in tears forever was to short
The flame that was once so bright fades to nothingness
Never again to be ignited it has brunt out
Twisted truths and forgotten lies stole the beauty once between us
Time travels on my feelings fade, you left me wounded and betrayed
Love felt lost life made lost, time falls short
Love, life, and pain taken for granted
Time wasted love merely tasted is all that came of us
Forever was to short...


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Further Recommendations

CalvinPeat: This is a great concept, and you've done a largely excellent job of capturing the voice of Mal.You convey Mal's inner struggle well. Perhaps, though, you could reflect the hope in verses 13-17 of Psalm 90 a bit more. A suggestion: in the current version, Mal seems to be losing hope in the idea of...

crissy: Awesome work. The characters are so beautifully flawed and easy to relate to. The protagonist Bethany Hill is a woman that I would definitely want to meet in real life. The author has managed to make me visualize the story like a movie. The two time frames of past and present are also so beautifu...

Laraine Smith: My only suggestion on the grammar is to use www.grammarcheck.net. I have it bookmarked on Google Chrome. I see myself in the determination in this beautiful story! I have Cerebral Palsy, and I have dreams that I have been working hard for, too! The humor made me laugh!

Laraine Smith: My only suggestion for you is to bookmark www.grammarcheck.net. As an American nursing home resident, I can only dream of traveling to Europe! I was so lucky to find this story! This is a sweet one!

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