Chapter 2: My Feelings
As I speak out of this feeling growing inside of me, so many try to doubt, confuse, or disillusion me, but there will be no intrusion, for it is not a game or façade. I give praise
to the Most High, our Creator and my Savior, as I mind my behavior. They say the proof is in the pudding, so as I watch the signs of the times and see what I see and believe what
I believe, I will not be deceived as I have received the spirit and his gift and praise him above all this mess and thank him that I am blessed, yet stressed as I wise up and rise up out of the ashes like a phoenix. I have turned my cheek week after week on the innuendos and slights. Not an entertainer or dancer you want answers to questions. I have some answers and questions of my own, but as I write these words that need to be heard, I am gifted in more ways than one. All praise to our Father in heaven and Savior at times. I may act wild, but still, I am kind and loving in spite of adversities, hurdles, and pitfalls as I begin to call out and ball out looking for my
queen in this life we live. Take a walk with me to see things have grown out of hand, and I begin to land blow after blow in this ring. I am king as I bring to bear this gift he has given me and to escape this misery and achieve victory. I hear the screams and agony of many and wish to lend a hand, and as I take a stand to the atrocities I see committed, I ask you what is it you do to your fellowman?
As I cry out not only to you, who are made in his image, but to nature and creation, that it is our station to be caretakers, not fakers or snakes. Wake up to what is going on around you as I begin to pound down and blast round after round, tearing down the lies as I try to reach out to each and every one. Time is running short, and he is watching, so be mindful of what you do to each other that are related; no matter the color, race, or breed in these last days. The wicked ways I am seeing are crazy and deranged as I arranged my own affairs; you dare as
I care more than you can imagine, but it is not a game, not a joke, so by these keystrokes, I explain this mess you cause with your games, who is to blame look in the mirror. As I begin to see clearer and grow older, hoping my warm heart does not get cold by the using and abusing of each other and then have the nerve to ask why the world is in such a state of dismay. Let’s be real as I deal out these blows and grow. The jealousy and envious ways are crazy. Again, I say I know I am not perfect by far, but I know what I am seeing.
There is no surprise to the demise as I make my entry and gently say the lies being told to hold power over others
is sickening as nation after nation rise and fall. We are all caught in a melting pot, so hot that it is boiling over as the seasons mix together not of the norm. A storm brewing while screwing up creation and our station to be caretakers, not destroyers, and so many claiming to be gods with fraudulent actions claiming to be grown. I see children doing tit for tat, the killing of innocent men, women, children, and nature wasting precious lives in this hive as we thrive to survive in Salem’s lot. The plot thickens as I have my own faults, but as we continue down this road of destruction, we are at the point of breaking or making. What road will we be taking as I make my way through this maze and give praise to our Creator and Savior that a new age is dawning as I yawn and stretch. This life we live is not a game as many claim, but a blessing and a lesson to be learned, so I ask, will you burn or learn and earn your way out of this mess as games are played out and time is of the essence?
So, as I watch and say a thing or two about what is going on in the world today with your laws and governments acting like boys with toys but of mass destruction. All the posturing and posing, threatening to destroy each other instead of working together to understand this world we live in and make it a better place for everyone. Instead of making war and weapons or, how about using all brilliant minds to make life easier and more pleasant. Longevity instead of misery exploring every facet of this wondrous world we live in. Begin to reach out to the stars once we understand where we live
and who we are. We were meant for so much more than war and savagery. In the world, I see where we live and breathe; there would be no famine or homelessness on this bountiful earth. Again, I say, since the dawn of man and Adam and Eve being deceived, we do everything to kill ourselves and each other with the knowledge we have gained. If we continue down this road, then we are headed for certain doom and destruction, but we can change if we decide to do so. Now is the time to make a U-turn and learn not to burn and earn the wings to fly to new heights and destinies untold.
As I open my eyes to the things around me and surmise the damage and the waste being done, we are one, yet factions and fractions of what we should be and could become in this life. If we make a change in enough time, we can avoid certain doom. I ask you, what will it be? Will we escape or make haste to waste in these last days? I believe we could and should be so much more if we pull away from this senseless violence and ignorance we do to each other, every nation, and every race. We chase certain destruction with this nonsense of superiority of race or breed. We all are one no matter the color or race. We bleed the same; feel the same pain, sorrow, love, and humiliation. Are we civilized or brutes, I ask you, animal or human? You claim to be mankind but where is the kind in man? It is appalling and disgusting the things I am hearing, seeing, and being done all over, and I ask how long will this continue, how long will this be tolerated—this waste of life and this treatment of each other and nature? Seriously,
grow up and wake the hell up to the nonsense. Because it’s really sickening, and he is watching and not happy. I tell you
I am certain of this whether you believe it or not.
This hell is getting hot, and I myself am done with the bullshit and the games as I look for my queen because I am king and done with the lies and the games. So, as I begin anew, and I tell you once again to watch your step and your mouth because I am beginning to nip and tuck the shit in the bud, I am not a killer, not a gangster, but I will protect what God has given me to the fullest. If you touch me, I will touch you plain and simple, so please don’t make me. So let’s get this together and make it better because there is so much more to this as I am seeing things believing but not believing
because it’s surreal, but I know it’s real, and he is watching and coming back. I have been blessed by our Father in heaven with the spirit, and I’m going to continue to do what I must and enjoy this blessing and nurture what he has given me and continue to praise him in his infinite mercy and love.
What does it take for you to understand that racism or hatred in any form is born of your ignorance and lack of knowledge? You, who would believe that you are better than another, what reason do you commit this treason against each other, who are your brothers and sisters no matter the color? What action can you do that cannot be done by another with the same knowledge or training? This sickness that you suffer to smother another because of color to gain power to see one cower, what joy is there in destroying another’s dream? To
hear them scream. I find it appalling and understand things are out of hand as I land these blows to let you know what goes around comes around and you will pay for the crimes you commit and the things you do to one another in this life. This is not all, there is to be as this misery is insane and the pain you cause each other, whether for self-satisfaction or monetary gain, is ludicrous and you will pay accordingly if not in this life, the next.
As you read this text, know that there is more to come. Because of your own lack of morals or values, you commit such heinous actions to another, causing grief and strife amongst families, friends, and nations for political power or gain. The stain you place on your soul—the price you will pay in the end. Believe it or not, you will be judged by the Most High and fry for your unjust actions. The suffering I see is uncalled for and undue to those that you force your will upon, and when that day comes, you cannot run and there is nowhere to hide because he sees and knows all. He is in everything and everywhere, so take care from this day on in what you do to one another as we struggle and juggle our way through this life and journey to our final destination. Stop wasting time on emotions of hate and anger that leads down the road of inevitable destruction. Pay heed to the deeds that are done one and all.