Love, Lust, or Something Else

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Chapter 28: The end of love, and a poet’s journey.

That very first time that I ever

saw you I knew that one day
you and I would be together
in one way shape or form,
and from that night of our
first kiss which caused a spark
causing our fires to rage out of
control down below in our place
of heated passion that has burned
hotter than any sun ever known
as even our two hearts melted
from the heat that rose from
the sheets rising until it came
to an end by your hand,
causing our souls to disconnect
and become lost and confused
as they were grieving over the loss
of a lover and a friend. I know
that we are soulmates who have
lost one another in a war, as the battle
for addiction is ripping apart
whole families and we are just
another casualty in this loves
war. I never quit searching
for she the one who stole my
love but now time has finally
|revealed to me that I have only
been dreaming of the
life we have lived in the past
dreams are what we hope for,
when we close our eyes
and go to sleep, I have found
that mine actually remnants of left
over memories as I buried
all the bad one to hide the pain
to deep. I have always
thought that our love was
meant to forever last,
but finally today after all these
years of giving to you yet never
getting anything back, all that
love that i believed we two have
always shared has
been nothing more than just one
of the many lies that you have told
to me and actually you yourself believe
my heart and soul have gave you
more than they should and all they
had but they were all alone, for your
heart only beats for blood in your veins
while your soul was never born. You
are the one that is guilty and a
trial you should stand with charges
of murder and mayhem for who
it is that I now am. You played your
games to someone who wanted
so bad to believe in you then laughed
as he fell to the ground, you have
shattered my heart beyond repair
no longer will it heal and
I place blame on only for you are
the one who laughed while you murder
my soul as it never has been seen
again. I hope in life you find out
who you really are for when you
fail and fall again and you always do
I promise you
only one last thing I won’t be
there to save you this time for your
knock will never be answered
and the phone will continue
to ring. We come from two
different types of people they
are givers and takers by name
As I have always given you everything
that I could and more and
you have only taken advantage of
someone who only asked you
for honesty and nothing
more in return. In closing I have
one last thing that I
want to say for when I am finished
writing this letter it will be the
beginning of a very sad day,
Poets are so much more than just
rhyming a few words down
on a page it is a combination of
emotions and feelings that are
transfused into our ink though
everything that we have gone
through. you have always been
my muse they are the ones
that inspire us the key that
unlocks the door to our gift
that we use now there are
some that will inspire love while
others will stain in hate but
you should feel very special for
not only do you inspire me for
both I have become a master Poet
in art of lies, dishonesty, and my
personal favorites abuse, thievery,
and deceit.
However, to end this
addiction that I have had to you
for all the drama that you bring
I needed to finally be honest
with myself believing that you
were any more than who
you really are a selfish
self-centered addict who cares about
only yourself and can never in life
love anyone or anything.
The last is something that I must
do as it strikes fear deep inside
of me for when a Poet kills
his muse he may never write
again. Muse you are unlike any
other as the strength you
have with both good and bad
to inspire in all that I have ever
wrote, you have taken me higher
than heaven and even lower
than the depths of hell,
this journey I will always remember
for it is one that I shall never ever
regret you have help me and
many others heal and shown
me what love really is and why
we all must end the hate and
and finally give peace a chance.
The greatest gift you gave me Is
the reason that this now must all
end. The link that you share
with her in real life is with the
one who I will always love no
matter all the pain she has
caused to me when she cannot
find love for herself. I know now
in your lives whom I have been
searching for, she is the one who
had danced with my soul. These
tears that are now falling
are mixed with much sadness
and joy for I smile knowing
that what I truly believed in
was real and the sadness is for
what I now must do. I banish you|
forever in my mind, heart, and soul
never again to inspire me your ink
can no longer be allowed to flow
I must now give up my Poets
pen, the hardest thing I will ever do
for this time the door that I have
asked you to leave through
will never be allowed to open
again.in the past I have always
believed you but I know now
that they are and always and will be
nothing more than lies
for you have not only destroyed
|our relationship, but myself, my muse,
A gift from God to the world
and proven beyond a doubt that love
does not always win.

Poetry is a smile or a tear, laughter and fears, good times and the bad, happy or even sad, Poetry is and will always be, our hearts and our souls who need to speak.

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