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My Smile Brings the Night

It wasn’t in a certain moment that I realized.
It was more of a gradual awakening.
You see, my world is full of light.
I wake up, and there it is----
I see it in the sun, in others’ eyes.
You know, I used to see it in me.
I could smile and light up the world.
But that was then;
This is now.
There’s a reckoning on the horizon;
Justice is always served to the Darkness.
It’s only a matter of time before I am taken.
My heart is an abyss,
My soul is void.
My mind festers and putrefies as it sits
In poisoned thoughts.
This isn’t what I signed up for.
I don’t remember the pen in my hand,
Or the motion of my signature.
But regardless, here I stand;
Mending my broken pride,
Trying to gather the pieces of my shattered heart.
I know what you all see in me.
I know how you criticize.
It’s funny how I used to think I needed your support;
But I’ve found I don’t need any of it.
All I need is myself.
My cold black mind will keep me company.
You can tell me how much I need you
And your money and your false kind words
And your pathetic excuses;
And I’ll just laugh because I’ve already lived without you once.
I can do it again.
Life has made dark what was once so bright.
But that’s the thing about us humans, isn’t it?
We always learn to adapt.
So I’ve embraced what I’ve become----
And now my smile brings the Night.
And I am proud.

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