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Too Much

I don't know how to breathe.
I'm trying too hard, maybe.
I want too much.
Is that it?
I think I'm dying.
I think I'm losing.
I'm breaking,
I'm falling,
I want too much.
I wish I could take this knife,
slice through the lies,
slice through the pain.
I want to tear down my world.
I want to build it back up again.
But the bricks just crush me.
It seems this world is too heavy.
So what, is it my fate
to let the wreckage consume me?
I know I'm strong.
But it's so hard to be strong
when I'm too weak.
I walk through the halls
of my burning rage,
so I can tell myself I'm in control.
But what good is lying to myself,
when I'm so in love with being
out of control?
I don't want to restrain myself.
It's beautiful,
my fire.
It's pure, it's untainted.
It's so frightening.
I want too much.
I want too much.

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