Dear Coraline

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These are the children that cannot love

I read a quote once.
Of children that cannot love.
And neither accept it.
Children too traumatized in their first years of life to bond with anyone.
I wonder if it's true.
I wonder if I am one of them.
Because there are moments.
Moments where I feel the cold nothingness of distance between my friends and me.
The man I live with is but a man who cooks food with me and gives me advice.
The girl I grew up with is but a girl who talks to me and sends me funny jokes every now and again.
I know I love them because I am... comfortable. With them.
And sometimes I believe that's all that is.
That's all that friendship is.
Someone you are comfortable with.
But then the moment comes.
It comes when I instinctively push my face to love.
I feel it Scrunch.
I feel the heat and the love formed in the corners of my eyes.
But my chest. My heart.
It is cold and distant.
And I know.
That I will never love.
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