I wish...

I wish I had a big fro,

I wish I could feel pretty,

I wish I was an average height girl,

I wish I had a real smile,

I wish My happiness didn't come and go,

I wish I could have a brighter personality,

I wish I could have more positive vibes,

I wish I had a best friend to feel whole,

A best friend to tell me I am pretty,

that I am lovely the way I am,

A best friend who would make me feel good inside,

A best friend who would help me live instead of survive,

I just wish that I had my own little circle of people who would do anything to lift me up,

but the sad part is I don't.

All this time I thought I had friends but I didn't.

I've just been wishing for something that I thought I had but reality had a lot of surprises coming my way.

I'm trying to knock on the door of the positive but no one is answering.

Is it because of me !? It's sad because people call me kind because I'd do anything for a best friend.

People say there is an end in a best friend but the truth is there isn't.

It's because are blinded by what they see and how they see their so-called 'friends' they haven't gotten a friendship like mine.

I have laughed a lot but also cried a lot and it was only these people who could lift me up,

it was only these people who could tell me that I am pretty,

it was only these people that could make me feel good inside,

it was only these people that could help me live instead of survive

and it's a friendship where there are ups and downs but we still managed to stick together somehow,

so I may not have a best friend who is another person, but I have a real friendship,

a friendship that has lasted and hopefully will last forever.

and they are called me, myself and I

and sadly I feel like that's the most real friendship I've ever had and the most real friendship I'm ever gonna get...