Grown

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Floor Blues

My mother used to come into my room

And scream at me to get off the floor


But rather than listen to her and be a good girl

I started closing my door, to ward off her advice

And feed into my vice


She didn’t understand, I though repeatedly

How necessary, how vital it was for me

To be, that close to the ground

When the whole world felt shaky,


And I was weary, at the age of fourteen

Already scared, of what,

I did not know


So I lay on the floor and felt the cool weight

Of my restless head on the soft carpet

In a horizontal position that forced my vision

Up, away from the troubles I saw


Until it made no difference whether I closed

or opened my eyes

And all that mattered was the music playing in my ears

And the ground I felt so near


My hands clenched at my side

The salty drops trickled by

I let the lyrics transport me to a place

Where I was just another face


And no one relied on me,

No one expected anything of me,

Where I could lie on the floor and pretend

That everything was fine, everything was great


And I know just how lucky I got

That my thoughts never took me

Deeper than the floor

That my mother never stopped

Interfering with my will


For I pity the parents who

Not knowing what to do


Knock down that door

Just one minute too late.

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