Alive
As the calendar pages fly by, the sun becomes our guide and the stars become our ally.
We’d soon become the person we want to be. We’d soon become the human being who’s not afraid to see the world so clearly, who’s not afraid to dive right into the ocean so vast. We’d finally find the answers to all the questions we’ve asked and all that’s been lost from the shipwreck that caused another chaos. And heartache will go straight through the shore. We’ll begin again as we reopen our eyes to see a universe made of steel.
For life gets tough from time to time. But what I want you to know is that, you are tougher than life.
I know. I know how life drastically brings you down and I know that you’ve been hurting yourself for god knows how long.
I know how you are when you feel like the whole world is against you.
And I know how it feels to be lonely for years. And I know what it feels like to be on the edge of taking your own life.
I know how it feels to fake a smile and suppress what you feel inside. I know the feeling when you want to let it all out but no one is willing to listen.
I know how it feels to hold on for some time, but when you finally get to see a flicker of hope, that’s when the villains come out and begin to scream so loud. Your soul is nowhere to be found and the monsters never stops taunting you until your lungs give out, until the screaming turns into nothing but mere silence. The pain is then multiplied with anger, divided by frustration. And the pieces will just leave you another empty bottle of hope.
I know the feeling of getting ignored, disliked, and underappreciated by the ones you value the most.
I know how it feels to stay in the corner of the crowded room because the people make you feel invisible.
I know how you are when you’re all alone — I know how much you want to scream, cry, vent, talk to someone but instead, you keep it all to yourself because you know how it feels to be judged and be labeled as attention seeker.
I know what it feels like to be in the same room with the one who makes you feel small.
I know how it feels to have low self-esteem when you’re looking at the screen. Or when you’re staring at yourself in the mirror and you see the ugly marks and scars glued on your body. You tend to ask again why.
“Why am I still alive?”
I know what it feels like to go outside and be seen by many — a number of familiar faces specifically. Sometimes they see you like flesh. Sometimes they look at you with pure disgust or some sort of sickness. Yes, I know how it feels to be mischievously stared at.
I know the feeling of getting physically and verbally abused. I know how the bruises, cuts, and stitches disgust you so much. I know how it feels to get harassed by a cruel unknown.
I know what it feels like to look for a hand to hold when your world seems to crumble.
I know. I know how you look at the world now. I know how cruel and dangerous and hideous it is for you.
I know ’cause I’ve been there too.
But haven’t you seen the other side? Haven’t you realized then how much you overlooked the beautiful things in life?
All that you see, most probably, are the ugly ones. Yes, there are hundreds and thousands and millions of shattered glasses, empty promises, and broken pieces lying on the ground searching for nothing but peace.
But the world isn’t that terrible at all.
You may see a selfish society, or a land full of beasts who wage nothing but wars, or an entire region of broken people who also tend to break other people.
You may think that the world rejects you so you reject the world.
And when you reject the world, you reject yourself too, perhaps incrementally.
Yet amidst the imperfections we all see, the system’s flaws and the animosity, I think it’s safe to say that there is still beauty in every tragedy.
The pain, the cries, the wounds, the gray skies — all of them will soon vanish into thin air.
Because my dear, pain is never permanent. Everything fades, and so do our minds change.
Sad, gloomy, mad, afraid, confused, angry, empty — there is so much more to life than what we feel inside.
The world is beautiful because it has you. You’re alive. Despite the things you’ve been through, you survive because you choose to. You’re alive, amidst the hurdles in life because you choose to fight.
You choose to live, you choose to stay. Because who would want to see your loved ones cry all day and blame themselves for the rest of their lives?
No one, right? Because my love, all those suffering and pain will always give you a lesson in the end — a firm reason to stay. And believe me, you’re a blessing.
A world without you will not be same for your family, for your friends and for the ones who utterly love you. Because no matter how much you try to destroy yourself, there is only one ′you′ in this world.
Please know that you are special. You are one of a kind. And I am so damn proud of you.
The world is beautiful because it gives you hundreds and thousands of reasons to be happy and be thankful for.
The verdant fields, the morning glory, the splendid sunrise and sunset in the sky, the refreshing air of nature.
The atmospheric sheath filled with stars gleaming with delight, the moonlight in the nocturnal sky, and in the lovely morn comes the sunshine.
The picture-perfect sceneries, and the unseen beauty of the oceans and seas and waterfalls and streams flowing so smoothly.
An adventure into the wilderness — the epic journey as you wander through your favourite places and some that you’ve never been to or even the smallest things might still do brighten up your day.
A song lyric, a piece of music, a bunch of poetries, hot coffees, or whatever passion is floating in the air screaming for you to find him.
All those stuff, all those little things mean something. You just have to dig a little deeper to see the world a little brighter.
The world is beautiful because the person reading this smiles. One genuine smile from a person can make someone’s day complete.
The world is alive and so are you. It just takes a little sprinkle of self-love, acceptance, and courage to grow stronger than ever.
And my love, never forget that you were born to be a warrior. The hurricane may be strong, but you are stronger. You are human. We all are. You’re bound to make mistakes. And so do we.
So long as your eyes still shine when your heart keeps crying, you’re alive.
-c.v.
