In the olden days there once was an act,
That if someone were to steal they'd be punished with an ax.
Now that we're in a modern day world,
That old punishment was forgotten over time's twirl.
But I never forgot that little act for the crime,
The little thief in my house is gonna have a bad time.
First I shall hold him and cut off his hand,
Put needles in his feet and force him to stand.
Tie him to a chair and tell him not to speak,
For I'll cut of his tongue if he let out a peep.
In a dark place is where the rats will come to eat the wailer,
Like the captains would do to their drunken sailors.
Once the rats have had their tasty meal,
I'll take out my rusty ax for things are getting real.
I'll brandish the blade against his skin,
I'll dig it so far that'll he'll be missing his limb.
Cut after cut he'd turn the color of blood,
I'll tie a hand grenade to his other hand for his hopes it's a dud.
After the explosion his hand goes boom,
I'll take out the pliers and dim the lights in the room.
Slowly I'll rip a finger and then a toe,
I'll repeat this process like an eager ho.
I know you think that after this I'm insane,
But revenge is the time where no one feels the shame.