Inside my Mind
There are things I have trapped inside my mind,
Things I can't speak of because I'm too afraid,
Many tell me that if I talk it'll all be fine,
I won't talk because I can't be saved.
I smile despite the voices telling me to stop,
I tell everyone I'm fine when I'm not,
I never felt like I was on top,
I want everyone to be okay because I feel the hurt a lot.
It's hard when you're surrounded by shame,
The pain takes over and I can't control my mind,
Everyone always thinks that I'm happy all the same,
But it hurts worse every fucking time.
I tell myself it's fake but it never feels that way,
The idea makes me want to do things I don't want to do,
I can't speak the words in fear of what they'll say,
The guilt of telling my pain would be the same if I were to kill you.
I don't want to hurt anyone yet I do everyday,
The voices in my head feel like I'm being stabbed in the heart,
I try to tell myself it's okay,
But eternally I'm falling apart.
I just want some peace from all this pain,
All these selfish songs I should've never sang
But the cloud over my head never stops it's rain,
Now my spirit will be the one to hang.