Slowly and nicely does the breeze go by,
I look at it and tilt my head,
The reason it's softness brings me comfort I wonder why,
The breeze brings me safely to my bed.
In my bed is my dreams,
In my bed is my nightmares,
In my bed I feel the urge to scream,
In my bed I don't get scared.
I get up from my bed without a care in the world,
I put on a happy face for the people to see,
Everyone wishes for me to dance and twirl,
I grant them their wishes however that's not me.
Everyday feels the same way,
I am waking up to the endless loop of the same old feeling,
But I have to ignore those things for people everyday,
Because they never knew that I wasn't doing any healing.
They believed my truths only for those few days,
But that moment ended and became my nightmare,
Their backs are now turned and faced the other way,
And I am no longer allowed to be scared.
Their eyes blinded to the reality behind my mask,
Their minds still burning with their accusations,
I told them my pain was real and how it'd be easy to grasp,
But before I knew I was sent to a different location.
That location I believed was real,
But come to know it was a trick,
My guilt still echoes in my mind as a punishment that'll never heal,
That thought of theirs will forever stick.
Little by little my heart begins to break again,
Over and over this process,
I'll never be able to look up and pray for the 'Amen',
I'll never be able to recover from the things I have confessed.
On the edge do I stand,
I'm on the verge of the act,
But my guilt for the things I have done is why I still continue to be on land,
Although all I want it to end it all with the trigger's snap.