The Neighborhood
My neighborhood is full of interesting fellows
Someone is painting their house a bright yellow
There’s always someone whose house is all green
And an old man who lives down the street that is mean.
A burst of music I never like
Wakes me up in the middle of the night
And don’t forget my next door neighbor whose strange
With the same shirt that he just won’t change.
And don’t forget the hot one who lives down the street
Working out in her garage, hoping she’ll meet
Someone, anyone, just not her spouse,
Making sure to wear a see-through blouse.
Oh yes my neighborhood is full of interesting fellows
Just don’t eat the surprise welcome of jello
That my neighbor across the street just made
If her kitchen was a restaurant, she’d get a failing grade.
So I put ‘No Soliciting’ on my front door
It should have read, ’No neighbors, especially that whore”
But still it seems, Mormons can’t read
Unless it’s the word of God, indeed!
Seriously though, my neighbors are nuts
Except for that one guy with the cute butt.
Did you see how his muscles fit in that tee?
Every time he passes I’m full of glee!
Can I have one weekend without a neighbor’s party?
In the middle of the night someone’s yelling for Marty.
And in the early morn someone’s washing their car
There’s a stain in the street that’s a little bizarre.
That stupid dog there always barks at me!
And the weird guy invited me over for brie.
Who the hell put beer bottles in my trash can?
At least you could do was share with me, man!
My neighbors are something else, you see
Except for that one they call Mr. Lee
The neighborhood gossip says he’s a kung fu king
Can trace his roots from the dynasty of Ming.
And what say you, of my neighborhood?
You’d live here too if you only could
And peak out your window very discrete
Whenever the hot guy walks down the street.
