Untitled; You Are Unworthy
The only date we ever went on was the only time we ever hung out.
We went for coffee, saw a movie, and ended up in the back seat of his car flailing about.
Classy, ain't it? But sadly, that's what I've come to know.
I've settled for thinking that's what I deserve, and I realize that's low.
Yeah sure, you call me gorgeous, but it's just 'cause you want to go all the way.
It's a lie I've been told many times, by guys who want to get laid.
I try to stay strong and have decency; have morals and say no.
But my heart seems to be my head's biggest foe.
Finding love is like finding that damned needle in a haystack.
After they have their fun and use me, they never look back.
I must look like a diamond on a land mine.
No one will take the risk, they won't take the time.
They don't care what I'm interested in; they don't care about my hobbies.
They just play with me; take advantage of my feelings for my body.
I'm a caring person, get attached and fall too quick.
My own necessity and tendency to fall in love makes me sick.
I ask myself, am I in love or is it just a state of mind?
A convincingly dreamy feeling, a lie that's one of a kind.
Maybe I'm too sweet, maybe I'm too nice.
Maybe I should be bitter instead, or be as cold as ice.
I don't understand how the definition of gorgeous has changed so much.
Or how they think it gives them the right to advance with every touch.
I want you to call me gorgeous, and mean I have a beautiful personality.
But most guys my age don't think that way in reality.
I think I've earned the right, to be respected and to respect myself.
I think it's my turn to be loved, in a way I've never felt.
I just want to apologize for caring too much about you, being there for you every day.
I'm sorry for actually getting emotionally attached to you; I guess that's all I can say.
I guess you'll find a new girl, one who doesn't mind being used.
But I'd rather be alone and single, if that's all you want to do.
One day I'll find my true love, or my soul mate will come find me.
But for now I'm giving up, I guess I'll wait and see.