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The Life in Rhymes of an Angsty Teenager

By Lindsey Olver All Rights Reserved ©

Poetry / Other

Contemplation

Here I am, in deep contemplation, all by myself.

Here I lay, holding in a secret that I will never tell.
And while I know you too are contemplating, I still cannot shake this feeling.
An unsettling feeling of uncertainty, as I stare up at the ceiling.
Along with my uncertainty, a copious amount of other feelings cloud my mind.
Unfathomable emotions that I never imagined I'd feel wash over me; ones I wish I could forget about and leave behind.
The unfortunate part of the situation is that I just can't force myself to forget this.
But if I don't then I'll be labeled a home wrecker, and I know that I'll regret it.
But it isn't fair that I appreciate you, and your appreciation towards someone else is not reciprocated.
Not only do you hurt, but it hurts me to see you like this; the suffering unmitigated.
I keep telling everyone different, but inside my heart betrays my voice.
The words of denial I try to convince myself of, clamp down on my heart just like a joist.
And no matter how much I want it to work, there's a part of me that always wants you around.
But I know that isn't possible, as long as you're constantly being brought down.
I feel like we're meant to be together, in one way or the other.
But until then I'll keep on contemplating, whether or not you'll always be with another.

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Chapters
92. Contemplation
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