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18+ A bunch of depressing poems. TW: SUCIDE, ADDICTION, ECT. (might be triggering for some readers ) This is a book of poems written by yours truly. Enjoy! Ps. These are very deep poems just keep that in mind.

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When Things got Bad…

I think it was bad when I could cry silently
I think it was bad when it felt like everyday was an eternal hell
And when shedding a smile was harder than shedding a tear
I think it was bad when my mascara was running down my face every night
And when all my screams for help where internal
I think it was bad when all I could think about was nothing
And using every second of everyday looking at a wall or ceiling
Instead of getting things done.
I think it was bad when the dishes on my nightstand started to pile up
Showing my leaning tower of depression
I think it was bad went from being my safe place to being my home
And when my room became a small studio apartment in New York City
I think it was bad when I was numb
And when I could have a conversation in the dark and cry right in front of them
And they wouldn’t even notice
I think it was bad when I drove to a bridge and jumped out of my car
And looked down
I think it was bad when I couldn’t see anything and my vision was blurry
From tears rushing down my face to make my body feel like there was something
There when there wasn’t
I think it was bad when I started to feel like I had nothing left
And when I felt like no one cared
I think it was bad when my days started to feel like a never ending loop
I think it was bad when the only thing that felt like a cure was to jump
I think it was bad when I took my last breath and saw nothing but water in my last second in the dark and lonely place
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