from the bottom of my empty heart

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Throw Me Overboard

Loosely inspired by the nursery rhyme "row row row your boat"


Merrily, merrily

Nightmares all the time

The right words aren't enough to care about, I didn't see it coming

/long sleeved shirts/

No one hears you

And then when they do, they call you crazy

Unless you're visibly bleeding, from your head to your eyes to your fingertips

You're overlooked, because there are seven billion other people, their inner voices taunting them from inside

Merrily, merrily

/bright and early/

Cough into your sleeve, don't let them hear

Don't let them hear your voice

Pass me, pull my hair

Take a second, baby, slow down

I wouldn't bloom,

even for you

My eyes are clenched but I can see everything

I thought you were mine?
So whose shoes are that?

Whose lipstick smear is that?

But it's not too late

Take a second, baby, slow down, you should know, that I get overwhelmed

From the smallest words to the brightest lights,

you should still know

/that's what they call me/

The boat is too full, I'm the last one on

Everyone else is somehow already on it,

I wade outside, my head, my body, my eyes down under

Don't save me,

take a picture.

I won't beg, I won't scream,

I won't tell you I need help.

You know I do.

You know I scream.

You know I beg.

And you release.

The anchor is at dock, now floating out,

Take me,

I won't cry. Try me.

I said, try me. Try me until I fail. Try me until I lose.

Life isn't a dream. You should know that.

Take the fucking paddles.

Build a fucking home.

Who cares, you're all alone.

This is for me, not for you, so don't you go and try it to.

Make your mark and don't be sorry, but when I'm gone, you'll see it too.

The world in all its glory, it's entirety, and when you're flailing, my ghost will hold on to your ankles, and pull.

/i like it too/

But that's not how I do it

Because you're the culprit, when you see what you've done to me,

then you'll understand, and you'll see

It was never you, it was never me, but the moon,

it was pulling us up all this time, while we drowned at sea

magnetizing all our senses

until we weren't awake, but half-asleep

Our wits gone for all the world to see. We dreamt and sank, further down, until our limbs were nothing but dark shadows, made for breathing in and out.

Life is, in all extremities, but a dream.

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