I woke up the next day wrapped all over Matt.
I think it was in my body’s primary instinct to always try to be close to Matt and now that we were finally together, I felt authorized to be curled up on him as much as I possibly could. My sleeping brain had allowed my hands to grab as much of Matt as they pleased, my legs were finally free to get tangled all the way into his, my arms were tightly wrapped around his waist and my face buried cozily in the bend of his neck. In this tangle of entwined limbs and mashed body parts, you couldn’t tell where Matt ended and I begin.
I felt like I’d woken up in heaven.
Our blanket had been kicked out of the bed, leaving Matt’s bare chest at plain sight. The view was extraordinary, I may tell you. That naked strong chest in broad daylight was something worthy of worship. No lie.
I sunk my nose further into his neck, trying to catch as much of his scent as I could. He still smelled slightly of beer, with a mix of sweat and cologne. It was an odd combination, but I still think he smelled pretty great, to be honest.
Then he stirred and began to wake up. I watched him yawning and stretching, making all the muscles on his stomach constrict in a stunning display of male anatomy. His jeans hung low, showing prominent hip bones and the waistband of his boxer shorts right below. The sight was drool worthy. My eyes slid slowly down from the soft thin trail of hair treading below his belly button to his crotch.
I glanced quickly up and Matt was watching me with sleepy eyes and an amused smile on the lips. He had caught me checking him out, there was really no point in trying to deny it, so I just gave him a wolfish grin of ‘yeah, you caught me, so what’. I was his boyfriend now. I had all the right to ogle him as blatantly as I liked without having to cover it up or lie about it.
“Morning.” I greeted, biting on my lips and glancing down to hungrily stare some more at his incredible abs. “Shame it’s not a morning glory though...”
“Pervert.” He playfully chastised.
“You have no idea.” I murmured with the most allusive tone I could muster up. “If you knew half the things that goes on in my head…” I said, leaning closer to his lips to kiss him.
He opened his mouth to say something when my ears caught the familiar click-clack of my mother’s heels in the hallway outside, coming towards my room. My eyes widened in realization and I knew I had to act fast. I didn’t have time to explain to Matt what I was about to do, so I just shoved him out of the bed as hard as I could.
My mother had no concept of privacy whatsoever. For as long as I lived in this house, she would barge in wherever I was, at all hours of the day and the night, without much of a warning. Bathrooms, shower boxes, the pantry, my room, there was no safe place where you could have a moment away from that nosy woman. The doors in the house didn’t have locks or keys, so, some ’alone time to be with yourself’ was a tricky thing to accomplish in the Holmes household, that’s all I’m going to say.
It was a tough life here for a horny hormone crazed teenager. Seriously.
Matt flailed madly with his arms before he landed on the mattress left on the floor last night with a loud thump. A second later, my mother called from the other side of the door of the room. “Taylor, honey, are you still sleeping?”
She waltzed right in, without even a one-knock-of-warning on the door. If I hadn’t pushed Matt out of bed just in time, my dearest mother would have caught us making out on top of each other in bed. Awks.
“Mooom!” I admonished her, scrambling to sit on the bed to give her a proper annoyed scowl. “How many times have I told you to knock on the damn door before you enter my room? A man has the right to have some privacy, you hear? I swear to god, I won’t even care anymore if you catch something you wish you didn’t see in here. The shame will be all on you. Don’t you ever say I didn’t warn ya.”
“Nonsense. You behave in here and we both won’t need to worry about me catching you doing anything you don’t want me to see.” She countered smartly. “Also, I’m your mother, you don’t need to have secrets from your mo-... oh, Matt’s here!” She clapped cheerfully when she heard Matt groaning as he sat on the mattress on the floor. “I haven’t seen you in ages, Matty! I missed you, you know? You shouldn’t stay away for so long.” She pouted, looking ridiculously similar to me when I pouted.
So I got that from her, apparently.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Holmes. I’ve been busy with school stuff. I’ll try to come over more often, I promise.” He said, smiling at her.
“Good. Taylor sulks nonstop when you’re not around. You’d be doing everyone in this house a favor showing up more often. Good Lord, what are all those bruises on your ribs, son? What happened to you?” she asked startled.
We exchanged alarmed glances and Matt quickly covered the bruises with his arm, looking flustered. We had completely forgotten he had no shirt on and his bruises were in plain sight for everyone to see. “O-oh, this was n-nothing. A few guys landed a bit hard on me at field practice a few days ago, is all. A couple elbows and knees in the wrong spot will do that to you.”
“Don’t you kids have gears and things like that to protect you in these games? This looks like sport’s brutality to me. I’m going to have a word with your coach about the intensity you boys have been playing, this doesn’t look right to me.” she berated, squinting her eyes at him.
“Oh, no! You don’t need to talk to coach, Mrs. Holmes. Seriously, this is nothing to worry about. Accidents happen in the field, is not a big deal, please. I’m okay, it doesn’t even hurt.” he lied, giving his best earnest smile.
She regarded him with suspicion, before giving him a nod. “All right. If you say so. But one more injury like that and I’m having a word with that man, accident or not.” She warned. “Now, boys, lunch will take a little while to be ready, so you two kill some time in here until I call you, all right? Play with each other until lunch is ready.” She ordered, before walking out of the room.
I sighed in relief and Matt slumped against the foot of the bed, looking as if he had just dodged a bullet.
“That was a close call.” I said.
“Yeah.” he agreed with a relieved nod.
“But she’s gone now. The coast is clear. Let’s go.”
He gave me a confused look. “Go where?”
I patted a spot next to me on the bed. “You heard the woman. Let’s ‘play with each other’ until lunch is ready, shall we?” I proposed with a wicked smirk.
Matt’s face turn the brightest shade of red I’ve ever seen on him. He stood up awkwardly, muttering something about needing a quick shower before he hurried off to the bathroom, without daring to look me in the eyes.
I hunched down and sulked on my bed for a while, trying to figure out what was going on with Matt today. He seemed so… skittish. Apparently, now that he didn’t have the bust of confidence that alcohol had provided him the night before, he was back to his shy, hesitant self again.
Vincent’s advice popped into my head again and I decided it was time to listen. Maybe the problem here really was because I wasn’t being active enough. I should take matters into hands and do something about it. I should make a move.
Maybe this could be the perfect opportunity to try something new?
An idea struck me and I skipped as silently as I could to the bathroom, and tiptoed inside. Then I stripped off my clothes and quietly slid into the shower box like the sexy ninja that I am.
“Hey! Do you mind if I shower too?” I asked and Matt jumped startled, covering himself with both hands while his eyes widened in surprise.
“T-Taylor, w-what are you d-doing in here?” He asked, giving a step back.
“I thought maybe we could take a shower together?” I said, eyeing him like a jungle cat ready to pounce on his prey. “Maybe you need help rubbing places you can’t reach?” I suggested with a seductive smile.
“I- I, it’s… I don’t really... I- I…”
“Why do you look so embarrassed?” I asked, frowning in confusion. “I’ve seen you taking showers, like, a thousand times before, Matt.” I pointed out.
“Yeah, b-but… it was in gym class. Now is different, you know? Now is… it just feels different.” he mumbled uncomfortably. “I’m done with the shower anyway. You can go ahead.” He skipped outside the box and left me there empty handed, with a baffled expression on my face.
I stood there in the shower, wondering what I had done wrong.
Had I gone too far? Should I have taken things more slow? Was he upset about what I did in the shower? Of course he was upset! I had practically cornered him in that bathroom like a big pervert with no self control. It was all my hormones fault! Since we got together, I couldn’t stop thinking about touching him. Why did I have to listen to Vincent anyway? Him and his aggressive corporate take-over moves. Matt wasn’t a soulless corporation, he was a person, with feelings. Now he felt violated, and it was all my fault!
I got out of the bathroom a few minutes later, after mentally debating what to do next, and headed back to my room. Matt had his jeans back on and he still looked uncomfortable, sat on the bed, waiting for me.
“Hey. Are you okay?” I asked, coming to sit with him on the bed, but making sure to give enough space between us. I didn’t want to step over the limits again.
He fumbled with the shirt in his hands, not daring to look at me. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He seemed so unsure though, and guilt gnawed at me.
I sighed, feeling like the scum of the earth. Maybe I had taken things too far. I just thought I needed to be more bold, more daring, since he was being so shy... but what if I had violated him instead of seducing him?
“Listen, Matt, I’m sorry if I pressured you into doing stuff you didn’t want to do. I can see you’re not comfortable. If you feel you’re not okay with something I’m doing, just tell me, okay? And I’ll back off. I promise.”
“No, it’s okay. I don’t mind when you want to do… stuff.” he mumbled, blushing a little and staring hard at the shirt in his hands so he wouldn’t have to look at me.
“You act like you mind, though.” I said with hurt in my voice. “You don’t seem to want to do anything with me.”
“That’s not true!” he protested, turning to me. “Last night was great, wasn’t it? Was I acting like I didn’t want anything to do with you then?”
“You were drunk. I’m surprised you even remember anything.” I mumbled. “Today you just want me to stay away. It’s okay, Matt, I get it. You’re allowed to change your mind. I suspected you were having second thoughts about us for a while now.”
“What? What are you talking about?” he asked startled.
I bit my lips and wrung my hands nervously. “You know that you’ve been avoiding being with me, Matt. After that night at the club, you never kissed me again. We just hang out and that’s it. I… I’m worried. I think you don’t want to be with me anymore. You’ve changed your mind about this. About us. Didn’t you?”
“You’re worried? Since when have you been thinking about this? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I thought it was best just to wait. I was waiting for you to make a move, or to reach out to me, in your own time. There’s a lot of things happening in your life right now, I didn’t want to be one more thing for you to stress about.” I told him.
“It’s not what you’re thinking, Tay. I mean, yeah, I’m trying to adjust, and there’s a lot of stuff going on in my life, but... I’m not having second thoughts about us, okay?”
“Then what is it? Why do you act so weird around me now?”
“I just… I don’t know.” He said.
I gave him a puzzled look. “You know what? Maybe we should take a break from this. When you figure things out, we can start over-”
“No, no.” he interrupted me. “What I meant was, I don’t know what to do, Tay. When I’m around you, I don’t know how I should... engage? I’ve never been with a guy before. I don’t know what to do. I act weird, because I’m overthinking everything and inside I’m freaking out, thinking I’m going to do something wrong and I’ll just… ruin this. I don’t want to mess this up.”
“Really? That’s all it is?”
He shrugged, as if he wished there was a better explanation, but unfortunately there wasn’t and this was all he had to offer, so I better take it.
“But you’ve never been insecure about this things, Matt.” I mused. “You are Mister Confidence in everything you do.”
“Hey, I know what to do with girls, okay? But I have no clue what to do with you! Girls are easy to handle. All I have to do is chase them around for a bit, work for their attention, wait until they feel okay with more intimacy and then I make a move, but you...” he turned to face me with narrowed eyes. “You don’t wait. At all. I don’t think you even know what shy is! You go straight from ’first kiss’ to ‘let’s do it in the shower’. I’m having trouble keeping up with you, okay? A minute ago you were only my best friend, man. And now you’re… you’re...”
“Dry-humping you into oblivion and stalking you in the shower.” I finished for him, feeling all kinds of inappropriate. “Sorry about that.”
“Things are changing too fast.” He concluded, scratching the back of his head. “I just a need a minute to catch my breath, is all.”
I nodded, finally understanding what was going on with him. I needed to give him time to figure things out by himself. Just like Vincent had said. I guess he was right about this too. Again. Damn the smart-pants genius rich boy.
“It’s okay, Matt. I understand. I didn’t mean to make you feel this way. I’m sorry, okay? I’ll take it slow from now on.” I said, holding his hand. “We don’t need to rush anything.”
He hunched on the bed, looking dejected. “I feel like a girl with all this ’let’s take things slow’ talk.”
“It’s okay, Matt, I can be a gentleman and wait until you’re ready. It’s really not a problem.” I joked to lighten up the mood.
I stood up from the bed and Matt caught me by surprise then, grabbing my arm, yanking me back and slamming me against the mattress. He crashed his lips hard on mine, his tongue pushing its way into my mouth, demanding and urgent.
He slid his leg between my legs, making me gasp in shock, while his hand sneaked under my shirt to grope me.
“I’m done being the girl here.” He growled into my lips.
He reached down to my jean’s waistband, and his kisses slowed, getting uncertain again. The discomfort he was clearly feeling was enough to make me want to stop what we were doing. He clearly wasn’t ready to take charge of anything here.
“Matt, it’s okay... you don’t need-”
“No! Stop saying we can ’take it slow’! I’m not a damn girl, Taylor!” he snapped at me.
“I’m not... I- I was just kidding, Matt! Wait, are you doing this just to prove a point to me?”
“Yes! I’m proving to you I am not the girl in this relationship!”
I pushed him away from me. “God dammit, Matt! You’re so dense sometimes!”
He stumbled back and looked at me as if I was crazy.
“But… isn’t this what you wanted me to do?” he asked, confused.
I pushed him hard on the chest. “No, I didn’t, you moron! I don’t want you doing anything just to prove to me you’re not a girl! I. Was. Joking, Mathew! I know you’re not a girl!” I shouted exasperated. “And FYI, being a girl is awesome, okay? You think being a girl is the same as being weak? You’re so fucking wrong, dude. You wouldn’t last a week dealing with the shit women have to deal on a daily basis, all right? And here’s another important thing you need to know: there are no girls in this relationship, you hear? There’s only two guys here. We are both guys, who happen to like each other. That’s it. That’s all that is. Okay?”
He gawked like a fish out of water, trying to find the right thing to say, but failing miserably.
“Look, I’m going to give you a pass on this because it’s all new to you, so, I get it, you’re still confused about a lot of things. It’s fine. I was like that too, when I first realized I liked boys. But don’t you touch me just to prove a point, okay? Specially a stupid point like this one. I want you to touch me because you want to touch me. If you don’t want to, then don’t!” I huffed out.
“I- I want to.” he said hesitantly.
“Yeah, I can see how badly you want it.” I grumbled.
“No, Tay, I- I do.”
“Right. Just... forget about it, Matt.” I muttered, waving a hand at him and walking towards the door. “Let’s just go downstairs, okay?”
He grabbed my arm again and drag me back to him, but this time gently. “Hey, you’re not listening,” he said, pushing me close until our foreheads were leaning against each other. “I want you, Tay. I really do.” His hand brushed softly against my face. “Let me show you.”
He kissed me so deeply that I melted in his arms.
God, he was such a good kisser. I didn’t even remember anymore why I was so angry at him a few seconds ago. He stopped kissing me but still held me locked in his arms, not letting me go. I sighed in bliss and opened my eyes.
That was a hell of a good kiss.
“I’m so sorry, Tay. Please, don’t ever think I don’t want to touch you. I do, all the time. It drives me crazy, I think about it everywhere, every time I’m near you,” he said, his eyes burning on me, urging me to believe him. “I just need some time to adjust, okay? I’ve never done this before, you know, to be this close... with a guy. When it comes to the protocol here, I get lost. I mean, what if I do something I’m not supposed to? Just like I did now? I don’t want you to be mad at me.”
I sighed again. My clueless dream boy. My adorable, beautiful, Matt.
“Okay, Matty. Let’s make a deal? If I do something you don’t like, you tell me to stop and vice versa. How about that? If I’m going too fast, you tell me to slow down. If you need time or space, just ask me. I’m here for you. I’ll be listening, okay?”
“All right. I can do that.” He agreed, smiling down at me.
“You don’t need to worry so much about getting things wrong. If you mess something up, you keep doing it until you get it right. Practice makes perfect, yeah? And when in doubt, ask yourself, ′what do I like?′ There is really no secrets here, we’re kind of working with the same equipment. If you managed to make it work with a girl, which is like, mystery land to most men, then with a guy is going to be like a walk in the park for you. You know all the tress and pathways in this park, and the shortcuts you need to get to that great spot where everyone wants to be. You know this park like the back of your hand, if you catch my drift.” I said making a jerking motion with my hand.
I gave him a teasing smirk, wriggled out of his arms and headed to the door. Matt stood in the middle of the room, making a face like he had just discovered a mystery murder case.
I laughed and skipped to the hallway. “Come on, Matt! Let’s go check if lunch is ready! I’m hungry!” I shouted and ran downstairs.
He joined me in the kitchen a few minutes later. My mother was finishing cooking lunch for us when Matt took a seat next to me on the table and grabbed the glass of juice I was drinking out of my hands.
“Hey! I just poured that for me!” I protested while he shot me a cheeky grin and took a big gulp out of it. It was common occurrence in my house to have Matt stealing food and beverages from me.
“So, boys... did you get tired of playing upstairs?” My mother asked with her back to us, while messing around with something on the stove.
Matt almost choked in mid sip then.
I stifled a laugh and eyed him while he thumped on his chest theatrically.
“I was up for it, but Matt wasn’t in the mood for playing today.” I told my mother while pretending I wasn’t seeing the glare he was giving me.
“Well, we did play last night, if I remember correctly.” He quickly added. “I finished Taylor off so fast, he didn’t even had time to plea for mercy. And it was my first time playing that game too. I’m so good, it’s not even funny.” He bragged, all smug, and smiled evilly at me before giving me a ‘two can play that game’ cheeky wink.
“It was beginners luck.” I mumbled embarrassed and tried to defend myself. “I’m very good in that game, okay? Last night was a fluke.”
“You were still beaten into a pulp though.” he hummed teasingly. “A very sticky, gooey, slimy pulp.”
I blushed so hard that the tips of my ears ears were boiling red. My mother mistook my speechless mortified expression for being a sour loser, and tried to console me, which made matters even worse.
“Come on, sweetie. I’m sure if you practice a lot, you can finish Matt off too in no time.” she said, patting me on the back for support.
“Yeah, Taylor. I’m sure you can do it.” Matt said, smirking like the devil. “I gotta warn you though… it’s going to be hard. The hardest you’ve ever had.”
I choked on my spit then.
“You’re so competitive, Matty.” My mother berated. “Why don’t you practice this game with that lovely boy, Taylor? What was his name again, Vincent, was it? He was so well mannered and polite. You two can take turns playing with him, what do you think?” she proposed cheerfully.
Matt and I exchanged flustered looks, trying to come up with a clever way to respond to that proposal, but all I could think of now was me, playing with Matt and Vincent together in my room upstairs. I began sweating on my seat with the mental images my brain was catering me with.
“Actually, Mrs. Holmes, it’s funny that you mentioned him, because Vincent had invited us to go to his house today. I think he wants some company. We’re going to hang out at his pool. Can Taylor come?” Matt managed to reply.
“Oh, that sounds like fun! He was around here almost every day for a while and then he disappeared. I’m glad you boys kept in touch with him. Such a handsome young man.” Mother chirped, batting loving eyelashes at the air.
I rolled my eyes at my mother’s blatant flirtation.
I took a sip of my orange juice when Matt added. “We can practice that game again at Vincent’s house, Taylor.” He suggested at the same time that he put his hand on my thigh, under the counter table, and slid it upwards until he was brushing against my crotch. “I’ll bet I can finish you off again as fast as last night.” He cupped me and squeezed softly.
I jumped a few inches off my chair and spit juice all over the table.
“Taylor Holmes! What’s wrong with you today?” Mom scowled, hurrying to fetch a cloth to wipe out all of the mess I’ve made on the table.
“Sorry, mom.” I apologized glaring at Matt, who was laughing quietly on his seat.
“Like a walk in the park.” he murmured close enough for me to hear it, with a private smile dancing on his gorgeous lips.
After lunch was done and over with, we hurried to Vincent’s mansion. This Saturday promised to be great if I could make Vincent agree to do what Matt and I had planned for the day.