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Blinded By Rage

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Summary

He’s an injured soldier, and she’s his physical therapist. They’re about to cross a line. There will be no coming back from. Kolan I took an oath to fight for my country, and it almost got me killed. My best friend and sister betrayed me. The girl I was supposed to marry deceived me. Now I come home a broken man. Until her. She’s the light to my darkness. The only question is, does she hold the power to save me from my demons? Book Two of The Blinded Series(A Military romance series). It's recommended that you read "Blinded By The Web" first to get a feel for the character. This can also be read as a standalone. Intended for mature audiences due to explicit language, war violence, and sexual content.

Genre:
Romance / Drama
Author:
Jessica Lee
Status:
Complete
Chapters:
3
Rating:
n/a
Age Rating:
18+

The Day Life As I Knew Was Over

Anger is a killing thing; It kills the man who angers, for each rage leaves him less than he had before. It takes something from him.”

~Louis L’Amour~


Kolan

Three months earlier

I’m sitting here in this sweltering heat. You would think at night, temperatures would be cooler. Not in Baghdad. It’s about one hundred and five degrees currently. Which sucks donkey dick in all this fucking gear. At least it’s not windy. A mix of sand and wind doesn’t bode well here, making visibility impossible.

Sometimes I wonder why I joined the military. When I told my family I wanted to become a soldier, they said, “You’re bat shit crazy.” But, the day after graduation, I signed up and didn’t look back. Pops took it the hardest, which surprised the shit out of me, him being a veteran and all. In his eyes, I was a disappointment. I’ll never forget the day I told my family. It was the night before I started my training at Fort Sam.

The room has gone entirely silent, and Mama’s on the verge of tears. I can see her watery eyes from a distance. Pops is standing there with disappointment radiating off him. Hearing the words “I joined the army” is probably some parents' worst nightmare.

Mama can’t hold back her tears any longer. “Why didn’t you say anything? You just joined without saying a word. Have you thought about how this will affect your sister and the rest of our family?” At the mention of my sister, my chest tightens. Despite being a few years apart, Kennedy and I have always been close. We’re inseparable. I’m used to her following my friends and me around like a puppy dog. It doesn’t bother them anymore now that she’s no longer that little girl with the pigtails. She’s a woman now, and that thought alone scares the shit out of me.

I’ve always had this overwhelming need to protect her from this fucked up world. My friends know my sister is a no-go zone. I’ve thrown down with a friend or two for just looking at her the wrong way. I won’t be here to protect her from slimeballs. No one will ever be good enough for my baby sister.

Then, I heard the door open, and there she was. Just knowing I’m about to break her heart fucking kills me. “Why is everyone so quiet?” Kennedy asks with a worried expression on her face.

“Hey, rocket,” I say, walking towards her. Using the name I’ve been calling her since we were kids.

“What’s going on?” Kennedy asks eerily.

Before I could get a word out, Pops beats me to it. “It appears your brother joined the army without telling a soul.”

Kennedy turns to look at me. “What? Tell me, daddy’s lying.”

“I’m sorry, rocket, it’s the truth. I leave in the morning for training.”

“How long will you be gone for?” She asks with curiosity. I don’t know what to tell her. The truth is I don’t know how long I’ll be gone.

“I don’t know, but you’ll see me before I deploy.”

“Deploy?” My baby sister asks with a look of shock on her face.

“Yeah, after training, I will deploy overseas.”

“Overseas?” She furrows a brow. “Like Iraq.” I nod. Just like Mama, tears flood her face. Then she’s running out the door.

“Rocket,” I try to call out to her, but she’s already gone.

Pops clears his throat. “You don’t know what you signed up for, and you are in over your head, boy. You will regret this.”

I’m pulled out of my flashback when something hits me in the face. “What the hell?”

“Heads up, fucker, you got mail,” Donny says with a smirk on his smug face. Donny Baker is more like a brother than a best friend. Sure, he’s annoying as fuck, but he’s always had my back and vice versa. We’ve known each other since we were kids. He spent a lot of time at our house when we were growing up. I come from a good, wholesome family. Donny wasn’t as lucky. His dad died when he was only a week old; a drunk driver hit him. The irony is after that; his mom became a drunk. His nana raised him. She is a strict religious woman you wouldn’t want to fuck with; Nana Kane did raise his smug ass, so you gotta give her cred.

Curiosity hits me. I never get mail unless it’s from mama. She’s the only one I keep in touch with back home. Pops doesn’t say more than a few words to me. And my sister, we’re not really on speaking terms at the moment. “Whose it from?”

Donny whips the letter at me. “Look for yourself.” He says, smiling. Then I see who it’s from, Rocket. Just as I’m about to open it, a call comes from the SCR-300 that’s attached to my hip.

“Sargent Bishops just got word that one of the Hadar district’s safe houses has been invaded. Five potential terrorists.” Lieutenant Jones calls out.

“Copy that, gathering up the troops now.”

The letter slips out of my hand as I speed, walking towards the guys. When I reach my brothers, they can already sense something is up. “Just got word terrorists have invaded one of our safe houses. Get suited up; we leave at twenty-three hundred. Let’s go.”

While getting suited up, I look at Kenton and see a letter clutched in his hands. Did Kennedy write him, too? The thought only makes me want to rage. That bastard is still talking to my baby sister. But, before I rip that letter out of his hand and give him a fist to the jaw, we’re already suited up and heading towards the convoy. I hop on the driver’s side, being the top commander. Also, I know where the location is.

Kenton goes climbing in the passenger seat, and I halt him. “Ty, you’re upfront with me. Kenton, get your ass in the back with Donny.” He looks at me with a clenched jaw but listens to my command. I can’t stand looking at that fucker for longer than two seconds. And to think I used to call him a “brother.” When he was fucking my sister for months behind my back. Worst of all, I caught them in the act. An image that will forever be engrained in my mind; one image a brother should never have of his baby sister. The thought of it causes bile to rise. Have to keep my head in the game.

As we get closer, I hear bombs going off in the distance. Then time stops. An explosion erupts, causing the convoy to flip up in the air. I feel a pain in my head when I hit something hard. My head isn’t the worst of it. Trying to open my eyes, I look down, and all I see is red. Blood is everywhere, and smoke is in the air. I’m unable to move, my ears won’t stop ringing, and I can hear the screams. Footsteps are coming closer. The terrorists are coming, and we can’t defend ourselves.

“Ty. Donny. Kenton.”

I try calling out to my brothers. Then I’m being carried and put in an armored tank. Where are they taking us? Are my brothers alive? I hear voices speaking in Kurdish. Every time I open my eyes, all I see is blurriness. I don’t know who has me or where I’m going; this can’t be the end for me.

Then the darkness takes over.


“Kolan.” I hear someone call my name but can’t make out who it is. A heaviness behind my eyes makes it impossible for me to open them. I feel warmth touch my arm. Who is that? Where am I?

“Please open your eyes. We need you to come back to us, son.” Pop? I get one eye open. The other one is closed shut.

“He’s opening his eyes. Get the doctor.” I hear a voice that sounds a lot like Mama. Am I in a hospital? In seconds, a ray of activity happens. Nurses come running in, shining their fucking lights in my eyes. With only one eye open, it’s difficult to see my surroundings.

I see a large man in blue scrubs standing over me, checking my vitals. I guess it’s the doc. My suspicions are confirmed when he speaks. “Mr. Bishops, glad to see you’re awake. I’m Dr. Ambrose, the surgeon on call tonight.” Once my one eye is completely open, I can look at my surroundings. Mama is on one side of me, and Pops is on the other. All I feel is pain radiating throughout my body. At least I’m alive. I have a feeling that I’m not going to want to be.

Wait! Did he say “surgeon?”

“Kolan, you suffered extensive injuries from the explosion.” What? Explosion. “You suffered severe burns over forty percent of your body and some head trauma. But, unfortunately, those were not the worst of your injuries.” I try to pick my head up as he’s telling me all this shit, but it’s impossible.

“Mr. Bishops, do you understand what I’m saying?”

I give him a look of confusion. “Huh.” Mama’s sitting beside me in tears.

“Your right leg suffered the worst of it. Unfortunately, we couldn’t save it.” What the fuck does that mean? Before he can say another word, I’m forcing my body to sit up, sliding my hands down my legs. I feel a bandage on the right. That’s when I feel the lower half of my right leg is missing.

“No. No. No.” I scream. Grabbing the tray by my bed, I toss it at this asshole doctor’s face. He ducks just in time and calls out for some help. This fucker just told me he cut off my leg. How the fuck am I supposed to react?

Before I can comprehend what the surgeon told me, a needle is jammed into my thigh, causing me to see nothing but darkness.


I wake feeling groggy and hoping this is all just one fucking nightmare. And I’m going to walk out of here with two legs. My hopes are gone when I open my left eye and see half of my leg gone. I realize this isn’t a nightmare.

It’s my reality.

Once I’m awake, the surgeon tells me about my injuries—the most severe being my right leg. My career in the army is now over. I’m an amputee. I would have been better off dead.

My mind tries to block out the news I just received, but I feel there’s more. Pops stands by my side, placing his hand on my shoulder. He hasn’t been this close to me since before I joined the army. Being a big, burly, gruff man, even I can see the worry in his eyes. My mind goes back to that moment in the convoy before the explosion. Ty was sitting beside me; Donny and Kenton were in the back. Did they survive? Sensing where my head is at, Pops speaks.

“Donny and Kenton suffered head trauma but should recover in time.”

“Ty?” He lowers his head. I already know before he can even get the words out. Ty’s dead, and I got him killed. It should have been me.

Life as I once knew it was over. I should have been the one to die that day.

Who am I kidding? I’m already dead!

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