"RING, RING RING!"
My gods! What time is it? Eros groaned as he picked up his phone.
It was only seven o'clock in the fucking morning!
Sitting up, Eros realized indeed he was not alone. There were also three sleeping naked mortal women in his bed.
Last night must of been some party. Dionysus always did throw the best parties. Eros smirked to himself.
"RING, RING, RING!"
Who could be calling at such a god awful hour? Eros took a look at his caller id. It was mother goddess probably calling him to scold him again.
To tell you the truth, he didn't care to hear her voice.
But unfortunately Eros decided to pick up on the third ring.
"Hello, mother dearest."
"Eros! I been trying to get in contact with you this whole month! Why in the hell haven't you been doing your job?!"
And there he goes regretting his life decisions.
"Mother, I just took a little break. Nothing too serious."
"That's the problem, my son. Your taking these so called "breaks" every other month! Your job is to help people fall in love and find their other halves not drop everything and party whenever you fucking feel like it!"
Eros began to fake a yawn.
"Ahhh,Well look, I would love to continue this conversation mother dearest but I gotta go."
"Eros, don't you dare! I'm not don-!"
He hung up the phone before she could finished her sentence. Throwing his phone to the side, Eros laid back down in bed hoping to get a little more sleep. He didn't want to get up just yet but mother goddess had other plans.
In a cloud of smoke, out came his mother. Her face was flushed red indicating her anger towards him. Even when mad, mother was still absolutely gorgeous. Being the goddess of love and beauty had it's perks.
"Eros! That's it! I'm sick and tired of your shit!"
With the snap of his mother's fingers, they were no longer in his hotel room on Earth. He was back on Mount Olympus Where all god and goddesses called home. Already there, was unfortunately my grandfather Zeus, his snake of a wife, Hera, and his brother Anteros. Aphrodite stood in between Anteros and Zeus.
Zeus spoke first. "Eros! It's been a while. How's life treating you?"
"Well, it was great until someone woken me up out of my sleep."
Aphrodite spoke up next. "Zeus, please don't pretend like his not in trouble."
"What? I can't even ask my grandson who I haven't seen in years how's he doing?"
Then Anteros jumped into the conversation.
"I'm tired of doing his goddamn job. I'm the god of required love, I avenge unrequited love. I don't deal with sensual love and desire."
Eros put his arm around his godly twin brother and pulled him in for a bear hug.
"What? You been doing so well in my place. People already mistaken you as me so what's the problem?"
Anteros pushed Eros away with a glare, and completely disappeared in a blink of an eye.
His mother shook her head in disappointment.
"Eros! The problem is that you haven't been the same since Psyche. I know after all these centuries, your still hurting but your still a god. You can't push aside your job anytime you feel like it. That said, me and Zeus have decided that you shall be banished from Olympus unless you get your shit together.
Banished? From Olympus? She must be joking.
"Banish? Me?" Eros looked over at Zeus, the king of gods himself refused to meet his eyes.
"I have decided that you shall not be welcomed back to Olympus until you finish a mission I've assigned to you."
"Wait? A mission?"
"Eros, silence. I think this mission will do you good and you'll be back here before you know it. That is if you fancy never being able to step in Mount Olympus ever again."
"What's so special about this mission that I have to be banished from my own home."
Aphrodite chuckled. "Well a certain human matchmaker needs your help. She needs our help and your the only one that can help."
"Mother, why would this matchmaker need my help? She's a goddamn matchmaker, for Olympus sake! Your not really going to banish your favorite son, from the only place over a goddamn human matchmaker?!!"
"Yes, that's the plan. As of right now you are not my favorite child. You do as I say until then you are banished from Mount Olympus! May the gods be with you my child!"
"Wait! Wait a min-"
Next thing he know Eros was transported in front of some sort of plaza building. It read "Heavenly Matches".
Ero's scratches his head. He went over possible options in his head. He could ask one his friends for help to return to Mount Olympus but he doubt any of them wanted to go against his mother. Aphrodite was nice women but her temper was even worst then Zeus's.
Beautiful but scary as hell. No wonder Ares avoided his mother like the plague.
Well all he had to do is prove to his mother that he hasn't lost his touch. After all he is the god of sensual love and desire. So finding the soulmate of one little matchmaker should be absolutely easy.
He'll be back in Mount Olympus in less then a day.
He was Eros! The god of love and desire!
Nothing can go wrong.....
"Veronica, I can't believe your ass set me up with that no good sexist ass, son of a bitch, last night!!!"
My good friend and secretary, Veronica Kenny looked at with me with sorry eyes.
"I'm sorry, Latoya. I swear I didn't think he was gonna turn out to be sexist. I thought he was pretty nice when I met his ass."
"Girl, this motherfucker told me that when we got married that I would have to quit my career and become a stay home wife!!! Lord have mercy, I was about ready to flip over the goddamn dinner table."
It's like this damn man had my whole future planned out with him before we we even sat down for dinner.
Latoya sighed in ignorance. What was she doing wrong in her love life? She was one the best matchmakers in Los Angeles. She was good at helping people find their perfect match but seemed to always to get the short end of the stick when looking for her perfect match.
She was getting headache just thinking about it. The blind date from last night definitely made her want to bury her head in work and accept the unfortunate.
God had gave her a gift with consequences. Maybe she was doomed from the start.
"Damn! I thought that guy was gonna be the one! He had everything you were looking for!"
"Yeah, sure he had the good looks and a very promising career but he was missing a good head on his shoulders! We don't live in the fucking 1800s anymore! Women can do more then cook and clean! Lordy, I can't talk about this shit anymore. Veronica, what's my appointments scheduled for today?"
Veronica took a look at her clipboard.
"Oh! Yes! Today you have four clients for today. In an hour with hotel mogul, Terry Connor, Miss CEO Jennifer Harris at 2, businessmen Harry Philips at 3:30, and Dr. T at 4:30."
"Okay, I'm going up to my office looking through the matches I have picked up for them. Just call me when my first client has arrived and remember to give them a very gracious welcome."
Veronica nodded. "Got it, boss lady."
Latoya went up to her office and sat right at her desk looking through the possible matches for each of her clients today.
Hotel mogul, Terry Connor was wealthy businessmen that own a chain of hotels all around America. Single dad of one six year son, age 38, never married, but wants to settle down and find a mother and lover for him and his son.
She had already had one women that would be perfect for him. All she had to do set up the date.
Tiffany Nicole Smith, a well off novelist who had just gotten one of her bestsellers approved for a live action tv series. Age 35, never married but also ready to settle down and create her dream family. Not to mention she loves kids and spends a lot of her time at orphanages.
As soon as Latoya met her in person she knew this women was the one Mr. Connor has been desperately been searching for. She smiled happily to herself, as she took a look at their schedules to set up a small date to get acquainted with each other.
After setting on a date, Latoya felt the need to go, so she decided to take a quick restroom break, before making the calls to officially confirm the date.
Leaving her desk, Latoya left her office very happy with herself and finally letting go that god awful date last night.
She decided love was just not in the cards for her and has completely resign in th fate god has given her.
Who would of thought a god would've bring her an actual living god at her lowest???????