Chapter 1: You enticed me
I am lying here on my bamboo swinger, swaying back and forth.
My hair blowing in the wind and my mind and body feeling so vibrant and alive. I love lying outside on my bamboo swinger just to relax my body, mind, spirit and soul. The fresh air feels so good whispering past me. It is a sunny day, but the wind is still blowing kind of fierce. I am glad I have my jogging outfit on. After I get through relaxing, all I have
To do is get up and start the jogging routine. There is
Something special about this bamboo swinger, that I love.
This is not your usual bamboo swinger, Bob had it special
Made and ordered from Europe. It cost him a sizeable
Amount of cash but the money wasn’t an issue when
It comes to Bob making me happy. He remembered how
Anxious I was, while I was there in Europe to purchase
This bamboo swinger. He talked me out of it, says
I didn’t need it and furthermore, how was I going to be
Able to bring it back with me? Bob must have
Remembered how much I loved and adored having
This bamboo swinger to take home, so I can relax and
Enjoy lying out in my back yard on it. I have a great husband
He does try hard to please me as much as he can.
That is why it is so hard for another man to take the love
I have for Bob away. It will never happen, as long as
Bob is true to me. I love my husband Bob dearly and
Will not allow anything to come between us. Bob surprised
Me on my birthday.
When I came home, he had ordered it special made from Europe. And it cost him a sizeable amount of cash too. Bob wasn’t concerned about how much it cost. He didn’t forget how much admiration, I had for it last summer, while we were vacationing in Europe. I had no idea that he would surprise me with it, by ordering it. This is the kind of guy Bob is. Loving and kind, always doing something nice for me to keep a smile on my face. That is one reason why I love Bob as much as I do. Even though we have heated arguments like most normal couples do.
Despite the disagreements, we still grasp on tight to what we have, the love and commitment to each other. This is all that really matters to us. I was in my bedroom when he surprised me with this beautiful gift. He said he had something to show me but didn’t want me to see it. I promised not to try to peek but to follow his lead. He put his hands over my eyes and led me outside. He took his hands off my eyes and I was shocked to see one of the most comfortable looking
bamboo swinger. It is awesome, the color is made of bronze tone and dark green leaves. It looks so eloquent but is yet so comfortable to lie down on and swing back and forth. It is really wide enough for two people to enjoy swaying back and forth. I feel this is why Bob wanted this particular type. He wanted to make sure we enjoyed
ourselves together lying here, whenever we decided to go outside and relax our minds. I have placed nice covers on it, which helps enhances it’s beauty. It is so comfortable and that is why I am lying here now. My mind is revolving around so many different things in my life right now. I look around and noticed the swimming pool, which is filled with glistering blue water. It is enticing to my eyes, making me want to dive right in and take a long swim. I choose instead to lie here and relax on my bamboo swinger. The view from this distance is breath-
taking. I can see everything from here. This is one reason why I like
coming out here to stretch out and relax. There is no one to disturb the peace and serenity outdoors. My dog is inside his doghouse, relaxing
and isn’t barking hardly any this morning, which makes it even better. My yard has a big wooden fence all around it where no one can see what is really going on. I have complete privacy outside. This is the way I like it. I love to get away and unwind sometimes. This is the perfect spot for me to do this. To unwind from the everyday frustrations and stress that has bogged me down. I can stretch out in my bamboo chair and swing back and forth and just let my mind be free. This is good therapy for my body, mind, spirit and soul. I can meditate alone. It is as if things I can’t seemed to figure out, or solve all of a certain, I am getting an answer to a once complicated problem that I couldn’t figure out. This is really the main reason I like coming here, to meditate and think of better ways to help me solve my problems, or at least come to some sort of reasonable conclusion. That is why I am here today, all sprawled out trying to solve some of my life’s mysteries. Which somehow lately appears to be impossible to do. I am not happy about the things that I already possess. All I do lately is cry about the least thing that seemed to bother me and I don’t understand why. I don’t want to get up and get going as usual. I normally would be up by now, getting ready for my morning jog. But for some apparent reason, I am feeling so emotional for no reason at all. The way I am behaving now would make me think I am under tremendous stress but I am not.
There is nothing in my life stressing me out. I have all the tale-tale signs of depression. But I most certainly am not. Why should I be? I have majority of the things in life I need and want. It is difficult for me to understand why all of a sudden I am finally beginning to realize how blessed I am. I am lying here thinking about all the things my husband and I have accomplished during our marriage. I have all the things a
young woman could desire from her husband and marriage. A loving little boy, named Joey, who we both love and admire. A handsome husband, beautiful home, car, jewelry; even some diamond rings, clothes, fur coats, shoes, designer purses. What more can I desire and
want for? But regardless to how many material things I possess, there is still something I feel missing in our relationship. I can’t figure out what is going on with me. I hadn’t really considered how blessed I am until this particular morning. I am too busy with my career and family until I have been taking These important things for granted. I feel guilty and now at this particular time of my life feel depressed or stress for not noticing them. This particular morning happened to be the day I am reminiscing about all of these wonderful blessings. This is one of those days for me. When I woke up it seemed as if I was in another world. I don’t have any explanation as to why I am feeling in this manner except for not enough sleep. Sometimes the trials of life can either make or
break you. My life so far has been smooth sailing. There has been no major catastrophe occurring, or any health issues, family problems, nor any financial crisis lately. That is why I am questioning myself right now, as to why am I feeling discouraged, or as some may call it distraught, for no apparent reason. I have every reason in the world to be happy and satisfied, but I am not. especially on this lovely spring day. This is so complex and confusing, the way I am allowing my emotions to over-whelm me with distress, for no logical explanation. I have to make myself get up and get started.
I will be late if I lay here any longer. I definitely want to be able to take my morning jog. I managed somehow to get up off the bamboo swinger. I got prepared to start jogging. While I was leaving out of the back-yard, my self-conscious mind began tormenting me again with what I have to be thankful for.
My name is Pam, I am a twenty-six-year-old
female who considers herself to be attractive, with very good attributes. I am not really just into my good looks, but rather majority of my energy is focus on my family and their security. I should take more time to take care of myself; instead my family is first priority, and is always in my heart and mind. I have a great career as an English Professor, at one of the universities here, in the City of Montana. Why of all mornings, life made me realize what a wonderful life-style I have. Before I could begin the morning walk, I am standing here gazing at my home, thinking all kinds of thoughts that are cluttering my mind.
It is a chilly spring day, and the sun is shining so bright.
The leaves have fallen all over the front lawn. The big trees stand so lovely and tall, with an air of enchantment. It’s as if, it is some sort of mysterious atmosphere. The scenery beholds so much charm and grace. People walking past my house, would be amazed at its beauty. My desire was to get out of the house, and browse around for a moment, but by me deciding do this is when I began to realize how blessed I am. The things that I have been taking for granted, now appears to be materializing before my eyes. But I began focusing back on jogging. I will be late for work if I don’t get started. I returned to the norm, beginning my morning jogging. This helps to relieve my stress, especially before I start my work day. It helps me to be more focus and relaxed. I was feeling calm and relieved afterwards, as if a burden had been lifted off of me. It helps me to compose my thoughts, without any interruptions from anyone. The moment my husband awakes, he is calling my name, wanting me to
make him some coffee. My darling little boy Joey, who is six years old, has those same good looking features that Bob and I have.
He is always wide awake, beckoning for me to come downstairs to fix his breakfast. Bob is my husband, and he is twenty-seven years of age. He is a loving, kind, attractive, affectionate man. His love is sufficient enough for me.
He loves me and Joey unconditionally, and is very protective of both of us. He has a prominent job with one of the town’s local bank. His position is Vice President. And have a fantastic income. He has
been employed there for five years. The job is beneficial to our family. It gives us time to travel and enjoy the finer things of life. We love Traveling overseas and loves visiting places like Europe, Italy, France. and Africa. Mom always keep Joey for us whenever we
traveled to these places. Except for whenever we traveled to Florida, Joey would tag along with us to Disneyland, and would have a great time. Mom loves Joey and didn’t hesitate to keep him for us. My mom is wonderful and that is why she is appreciated for all the good things she does for me and my family. Whenever problems are surmounting, mom is the one who has always, been here for me. She always offers plenty of good advice, and wisdom to help encourage me along the way. I Nick-named her, “My problem solver.”
She doesn’t do anything but laugh when I say that. She likes it, whenever she is being referred to that name title.
The title is compatible to her sweet personality. She is someone dependable in time of need. Dad is wonderful too. I can recollect when Bob and I first got married, and was having financial problems; dad bailed us out of
the hole. He paid all the extra bills we had accumulated.
Bob was so distraught whenever he had to depend upon Dad to assist us. He is an independent man who loves being able to support and take care of his family. He hated having to bother dad for anything. Once he got himself out of the red, as it is preferred to, he kept tabs on his money, and made sure every cent was accounted for. He invested his money in lots of different money making schemes that helped his money to increase and grow interest. This is a wise decision on his behalf. It kept our financial situation more stable. He didn’t like the fact that he had to approach my dad for help. I understood how he felt, because that is the way his character is. He is very independent and strives to accomplish his goals. He always reminded me, the reason he attended college, is so he can support his
family. He has always wanted to stay focus and strong for the younger generation. He wants to be a role model for his son, allowing him to experience the magnificent, of living a successful and independent lifestyle of his own.
Bob’s parents died tragedy in a car accident and this really dampened his spirits. Bob constantly reminded me of how they both were good parents who he loved dearly. His parents were employed in the corporate world. Bob’s father was an executive officer for a big insurance company. While his mother held position as executive head nurse over the critical care unit in the hospital. They both had good working careers and made sure Bob was able to attend college to get a good education also. Bob and I are only children. He has no other siblings and neither do I. I always encouraged him and uplifted his
spirits as much as possible, especially after the unfortunate accident involving his parents. This was a difficult time in both of our lives.
somehow he managed to keep hope alive and to live on. Little Joey
has been a blessing to him. He kept Bob strong and stable, along with my love too. Bob managed to cope with their tragedy a lots better. He eventually returned to his old self again and I was happy about that. This is the happy, loving, caring man I had married. I was glad to see his old characteristics return and for my Bob to be himself again. This is why my parents play such an important role in our little boys’ Joey life. This happens to be one of those days when I am reminiscing about all the many blessings that has been bestowed upon us. A wonderful husband, a loving child and secure jobs, which provides and help support our family, without us having to struggle. This means the world to me. I am realizing how this eloquent life-style of ours came about. It is attributed to hard-work, perseverance, and the will to reach those goals and accomplishments. Which brought us to this status in life
we are presently enjoying. It is beginning to get chilly outside, the
wind has started blowing right in my direction. I lost track of time, lying on my bamboo swinger day-dreaming and it’s gotten late. Normally I would be jogging by now. I am determined to take my morning jog, but might be late preparing my husband’s breakfast or coffee, but it doesn’t matter. It has never been like this before. Normally, his breakfast and coffee is always ready for him. He has nothing to complain about. He can always prepare his own coffee and I know he can fry an egg. Somehow I managed to get myself together and get up and start the daily routine. I unlocked the back yard gate and I began walking through the pathway from my yard, this is the usual path I normally jog. The scent of roses, always put a special aroma in the air, and was so invigorating. The air smelled so fresh and clean.
This scent elevated me more, and puts me in a good mood. The scent of spring was in the air. I was compelled to smell the scent of the rosebushes this morning, as I was walking down the pathway. The the fragrance coming from the flowers are arousing. I hear and feel nature all around me while beginning my journey to jog. The birds was humming a beautiful song that mesmerized my ears. I Loved hearing it and it also helped soothe my soul. The crickets in the trees are chirping, making those weird sounds as I was passing by. I
recognized the crickets chirping, making that weird sound as I passed by. Some of my neighbors, are walking with their barking dogs, through the pathway. We spoke to each other in a casual way. By it being such a bright, beautiful spring day, I wondered why the atmosphere felt somewhat strange, and different to me. I tarried about, walking, slowly instead of jogging in the pathway.
I MEET THE HANDSOME YOUNG MAN:
When all of a sudden, here comes a tall handsome, classical looking young man, who appears to be about twenty years of age, jogging along the pathway. He was wearing a gray jogging suite that showed off his well-built body. He was jogging so fast until he almost ran into me. His head was down and he had earphones in his ears. He bumped into me and then stopped. He apologized for bumping into me and said he was sorry. I assured him that everything is alright. He stared into my face and I couldn’t help but stare into those big beautiful eyes of his. He had me captivated. I couldn’t bulge, it’s as if, I was frozen and couldn’t move. I asked myself, “Pam what is wrong with you, why are you behaving in this manner?” “Don’t you know you are a married woman and have a child? You might as well wake up out of this fairy tale and come back to reality”.
He might have thought, “I am crazy or something, standing there in a daze?”
He repeated himself, and asked me, “Are you alright again?
I slowly blurted out of my mouth, “Oh yes.” “Sorry for staring at you like that, But your face looks familiar to me.” I hated lying, but had to think of something really fast to justify my actions. I am going to be late for work, because I started out late this
morning, for my regular jog, and must be finding my way back home. He tried consoling me, by reaching out his hand for me to shake it. I refused to shake his hands and walked briskly away from him. While I was walking away, he was watching me leave, as if to say, “I Will see you again”. It was if my mind was in tune with his at the same time.
I was saying to myself,
“I want to see you again too”.
I Wondered why these kinds of thoughts are entering my mind?
This sounds ridiculous and I must get myself together.
My Bob is enough for me at home. He gives me practically everything imaginable. Bob is a good lover and there’s no complaints, about him in the bed. This is what’s confusing to me. I am being so thrilled about another man’s eyes? Bob’s eyes are just as beautiful.
I think Bob and I should go somewhere special. We need some alone time and that is exactly what will be arranged. We need to eat at one of our favorite restaurants and have a good meal. Maybe drink a little wine and just relax our minds and rekindle our love, like we have never done before. I need to reassure myself, that Bob is all the man for me. This lustful spirit must be eliminated.