Living With The Boys (Journey to Love, #1)

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03. Rushed Words

Hope’s POV

The next morning I wake up feeling like I’m being cooked, that is the only way to describe my body temperature right now.

I’m a little confused since in the last 3 months I have been sleeping with Mike he has never suffocated me like this, I literally feel like I might end up with second degree burns from this heat.

Of course there have been days when I would wake up and he would be cuddled up behind me or I would be the one to go over to his side and have my leg either over his or in between, I think on one of those amazing morning I fell in love with him.

There are just a lot of little things about these guys that makes it almost impossible for you not to love them and I have come to accept that I am completely and crazily in love with three guys.

Now I know it sounds completely ludicrous that I am not in love with a man like normal but my heart is stolen by three.

I then remember exactly what happened last night and if I wasn’t boiling right now then I’m sure that I would be blushing right now. I cannot believe that I slept with all three of them last night, I also can’t help the smile on my face as I realise that they feel the same way about me as I do about them.

That makes the past two and a half months of pure torture so much better and as if it never happened. You don’t know what torture it is seeing the girls on campus flirt with Mike, Martin and Mark, of course they didn’t do anything about any of the offers, as far as I know. However, it did seem a little weird to me at the time that they would turn down those gorgeous and smart girls but now it all makes sense.

That does wonders for my confidence.

What is also helping my confidence is the hard cock pressed against my butt and the one pressed against my stomach, what better way to wake up?

“I think someone is trying to pretend that they’re not awake.” whispers Martin from somewhere behind me but I know he is not the one behind me, so I turn my head to me Mark behind me which means that Mike is the one holding my waist and is clued to my chest.

“I’m not pretending, I just woke up.” I say in a hushed tone since I’m not sure if the others are awake or if my voice is going to co-operate this morning.

“We’re all awake, you can stop whispering, even though you have more of a stage whisper Hope.” replies Mike from beside me and I can’t keep the smile off my face as I think about last night and what it means.

I know it’s not the most normal thing in the world to be in a relationship with 3 guys and be in love with all of them but yet here I am in bed with them and there is nowhere else I would rather be, and anyway normal is so over rated.

“Do you have to be so loud? I’m still trying to sleep here.” complains Mark from behind me and because he is so close I can feel his chest vibrate with the words and his warm breath hitting the back of my sensitive neck, making me shiver in between them which seems to be the wrong thing to do since I end up brushing against two very happy guys pressed against me.

Mike and Mark groan at my little moment which caused me to rub against their morning happiness and in return I realise that I am not wearing clothes since we didn’t exactly need last night but it also makes me conscious that I have not showers since last night and I am all kinds of dirty right now.

I try and move in any direction so I can get out and head to the shower but I am stuck in a delicious sandwich that I don’t really want to get out from but the more I think about it the more I need a shower right now.

“I need to take a shower.” I whine since neither of them are moving to let me go and I feel disgusting and sweaty as it is weirdly warm here for early winter in the UK.

“Just cuddle for a little bit longer.” whispers Mark from behind me but I roll my eyes since he just wants to stay in bed longer, I swear if he decides he’s staying then there is no one or anything that will get him out of it.

Just as I was about to say something to make them move, Mike moves and gracefully rolls of the bed and I am finally free! However, I didn’t think past getting out of the bed as Mike is standing there buck naked and now I have to stand up and walk to the bathroom in the same outfit.

Really didn’t think this through.

I look around the floor in case there is a lose shirt or something I could quickly put on as I don’t think I am confident enough to be walking around in plain daylight naked while they can stare at every single little insecurity and flaw I might have, if anyone is that confident then could they teach me?

I don’t find anything so I sigh and get mentally ready that I’m about to be more naked than I was last night. Last night they were focused and preoccupied with other things than to be finding my flaws, they saw the main attractions and were happy with those.

I stand up and try to tighten and suck in everything as I can feel their eyes follow me around the bed and I should feel empowered and wanted but there are little thoughts running through my head that are stopping me and holding me back from just dancing around this room naked.

I take large steps around the bed as I try to look as natural as possible but also at the same time not seem as if I’m trying to run away even though I am, they don’t need to know that.

“Want me to join you babe?” asks Martin from the bed where he has turned onto his back and I have the glorious view of his abs and the classic sheet covering his lower half, how do guys always seem to manage that sexy effortless pose?

“I think I’m a bit sore.” I answer truthfully but they all get those confident smirks on their faces as I realise why they all look like dogs that just got their treat, that’s because they did.

“Then Mike’s your guy.” answers Mark as he turns over and goes back to sleep so I stop for a little while to stare at the two of them in bed as they look so cute but I am quickly distracted as I feel Mike walk up behind me and I get those weird butterflies in my stomach as his arms go around my waist and pull me back into his chest where I just have to close my eyes to savour the warmth and comfort his hold offers.

“I’ve been told that I’m quite good with my hands.” He whispers in my ear and I quickly turn to look at him in surprise since he didn’t strike me as the kind of guy to make those kinds of comments but the sudden need to tighten my thighs together is more than enough evidence that I love this side of him.

“I think I need to gather more evidence before I can agree.” I reply in the same tone he did but I don’t think he expected me to reply since he looks away and gets this cute flush to his cheeks before looking into my eyes before making his way into the bathroom, while I just stare at him a bit confused but in awe at the same time.

I just don’t know how I was ever lucky enough to meet them all, I could have ended up in a house with assholes or in some disgusting little room but yet here I am. Also how could his ex ever cheat on Mike, he is probably the most genuinely nice person I have ever met.

I hear the water turn on so I decide I’ve wasted way too much time overthinking this and I should enjoy the present, right?

When I walk into the bathroom I am hit with the warm air but what takes my breath away is Mike standing naked in the shower with water gliding down his back and with his hand outstretched to me and a small shy smile on his face.

I return it and reach out to grab his hand as he drags me in with him underneath the hot water but I don’t feel anything else but his hand in mine as my eyes drift close when his other hand goes to my face and I wait for his kiss.

Last night is a little blurry in terms of who I kissed and who was where, I just know that I had the night of my life both physically and emotionally but being here like this with him is so much quieter and less hectic, like I can really think about and feel every single second passing by.

It’s just a couple of seconds which felt like minutes before I felt his lips press softly against mine, unsure and gentle at first as we both get used to kissing each other but as the sparks fly hotter with each passing second we can do nothing to fight it.

Our kiss becomes more passionate, not rushed or forceful but the need to express our feelings through the kiss is undeniable and neither of us wants to fight it anyway. It’s really not as poetic as I’m making it sound since as soon as we both become more relaxed, we forget who is in the other room and that there is anyone but us.

My arms reach up around his neck and bring him closer, letting our bodies touch with nothing hidden here in the bright lighting and curious hands. I trail my hands over his broad shoulders and just feel his soft skin underneath my fingertips, skin I have I wanted to caress for the past 3 months and sleeping next to him was sweet torture.

His hands do the same as they both go to my waist and effortlessly pick me up and I take the hint to wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his shoulders to hold on. All the while we have not broken that first magical kiss.

I reluctantly pull away from him and just stare into his beautiful blue eyes that seems to be staring deep inside me in a way that no has done before, there was no one before him that I would let inside.

Even though both of us are out of breath and soaked which is probably not my best look, he is still staring at me as if I am the most beautiful woman he has ever seen, I don’t know if he is thinking that but he is making me feel like it which is even more precious.

“I love you.” I whisper by mistake, breaking the comfortable silence we had cached ourselves in and I regret it instantly as I see him shut me out and hold me in silence.

“You guys going to shower or fuck?” asks Martin from the doorway as he smirks our way, breaking the tense silence and getting a smile out of me even though I want to crawl into a hole and hide for the next couple of years.

“Shower.” replies Mike as he sets me down on the cold tile floor and turns with his back to me while he grabs his shower gel and begins to shower, leaving me behind him with not a single word towards me.

I hold back the tears in my eyes as he continues to ignore me so I grab my towel and walk out of the shower and back into the bedroom where Mark is no longer in bed and nowhere to be seen but Martin is right behind me as he had just finished brushing his teeth, I can always count on him to make me laugh and smile when all I want is to hide from the world and sleep.

“So do you have any lectures today?” asks Martin from behind me as he wraps his arms around my waist and follows me down the stairs once we had both gotten dressed for the day.

“Yeah, I only have an hour long one in the afternoon but tomorrow I have a full day from 9 till 4.” I answer with a small smile as he pushes us towards the kitchen which is something normal for Martin as he is always eating something.

“Great! I have a lecture today as well so I can walk with you.” he gives me a big smile before pecking my lips and moving on to raid the fridge.

“Do you still not know my schedule?” I ask as I take a seat on one of the chairs and stare at his naked back, he did get dresses but he apparently forgot his shirt.

“I don’t remember things I don’t need to, I can just ask you.” He replies once again with a massive smile on his face as he makes himself a sandwich and slides one across to me as well, making me smile at the little things he does.

“Fine.” I reply with a fake frown on my face but it’s quickly turned into a smile when I feel a pair of hands on my sides tickling me, which would mean me on the floor if the hands weren’t there holding me up on the chair.

“Why is my princess frowning?” came a cheery voice behind me and I laugh as Mark continues to tickle me while I try to fight him off and free myself from his devil hands.

“She’s just playing.” Mike pipes in as he walks in the room and my mood is once again down in the dumps, why did I have to slip up and say it?

“Well I have a shift now so I’ll be leaving.” Mark interrupts while looking at me with sad eyes, knowing that I’ll see him tonight is just too far away. I miss them when they have to work, even if it’s just for half a day or a couple of hours.

“Have a nice day.” I reply with a smile since I don’t want him to be sad or worried about me while he’s at work and there’s many other things that he could be worried about but knowing the boys, they’re always thinking about me which is incredibly sweet but I don’t want to be that kind of a burden.

“Bye babe.” He replies with a smile before pecking my lips and waving goodbye to the guys as Mike is leaning against the counter and drinking coffee while Martin is still eating.

“Well I’m going to get dressed and get going.” Martin says breaking the now awkward silence and gets up and leaves the kitchen all in a couple of seconds, of course leaving me and Mike behind which cannot be any more uncomfortable for me.

We spend a couple of seconds avoiding each other’s gaze before I just get up and walk out of the kitchen and up to our bedroom to grab my bag and books for today as the hurt is wearing off and I am starting to get pissed off at him.

If he wants to act like a child then he can do just that but he is not going to take whatever is on his mind on me as I have done nothing wrong. Maybe I rushed saying those three words but that doesn’t mean he has to ignore me and act as if I am gum on the bottom of his shoe.

I thought that this whole thing was meant to be more than just a quick fuck but he is not acting like the others are. I just don’t understand if I am someone special to him and if he cares about me, why would he become so cold after I tell him that I love him?

That’s not a bad thing, at least I didn’t think it was before I said it out loud. Of course I hoped that he would say it back but that doesn’t I would have been mad when he didn’t. However I wasn’t expecting him to complete switch on me like that.

“You ready?” asks Martin from the doorway as he leans in with a smile glued on his face, waiting for an answer from me as I am just standing in the middle of the room with my bag in my hands and staring at the wall next to him.

“Yeah.” I answer with a small smile just to reassure him and walk behind him down the stairs and past the kitchen where Mike is nowhere to be seen and right now I don’t want to see him anyway, I lie to myself.

“I would think that after last night you would be pretty happy.” Martin jokes beside me with a proud smirk on his face as I laugh and roll my eyes at his macho display.

“I am happy.” I grin at him and grab his hand in mine to link our fingers while walking on the little road that leads us to the main campus. We only live 15 minutes walk from the university.

“You know you can’t lie to me.” he stops us as he wraps his arms around my waist and looks at me, more seriously than I have ever seen Martin be.

“Can I sleep in your bed tonight?” I ask instead as I don’t even know how to describe what I’m feeling right now and why I’m lying to him, I know that he’ll understand but there is something holding me back.

“Of course you can, but why do I get the feeling that this is not because you want to be with me but because of something else.” he says with a frown on his face and I reach forward to wipe it off of his face since it’s not right for him to be frowning and I want him to understand that he is not second or third choice.

“I want to spend more time with all of you and I’ve been sleeping with Mike for the past 3 months, maybe its time that I got to cuddle with you.” I reply truthfully since I love all of them and want to be near all of them and not just Mike.

“He said that you guys don’t cuddle.” he asks with a confused look on his face which is adorable.

“We didn’t, so you’re going to be the first one I cuddle with.” I smile widely at the thought as my mood improves thinking of how much fun it’s going to be being with Martin most of the day and through the night, he really is the one that can make me laugh and smile when I want nothing to do with the human race.

I guess you could say that he is my favourite human.

He smiles widely at me as he takes in my words and leans forward to kiss my lips gently before biting my bottom lip and sucking it gently into his mouth before letting go and pressing multiple small pecks on my lips, making me laugh in joy at how cute and adorable he is.

“Tonight you’re sleeping with me.” he says quietly almost as if he can’t believe it and the smile on his face is contagious, making me feel elated that I’m the one making him this happy.

“Don’t look so surprised.” I laugh at the face he is pulling and hug him, basking in the warmth and comfort his arms offer.

“I’m just so happy, that’s all.” he replies with one of his smiles and I’m really glad in that moment and he is one of those people that are unafraid of voicing their feelings and don’t beat around the bush, well he did for three months but so did I so he’s forgiven.

“Well maybe we should be less happy and head to lesson.” I say with a small laugh as I realise that there are people around us running and rushing towards the campus, meaning they overslept and that we’re going to be late if we don’t hurry up.

“Oh shit I forgot about school.” he curses and takes my hand before running towards the campus with me laughing and stumbling behind him.

For the next two hours I don’t see him as I am engrossed in what my professor is teaching and nothing outside of the lecture hall is important as I try and keep up with the note taking and also think about what I’m being told.

I’m not going to lie, university is very hard work but when you are doing what you are truly interested in then it’s not a chore for you to learn that extra chapter or do those extra 30 minutes of work just so you know more about your field.

However, saying all those things it doesn’t mean that your brain isn’t fried when you come out of those lectures since right now I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to do simple maths with the pounding headache that I feel coming on.

I gather my stuff and say goodbye to some of the people I have befriended in class, making promises and plans for the weekend which I gladly accept as I would love to get to know everyone more as we are going to be together for the next couple of years and people always say that your friends from university are for life so I want to see if I can find those friends.

I don’t keep in contact with any of my friends from high school except for my best friend from whom I haven’t heard of in a couple of weeks but he’s excused as he’s in medical school and we all know how hard that is.

I’m one of the last people to walk out but I don’t mind since right now I need some time to cool down and take things a little easier after that long lecture, today he really went for it, I guess we are starting the more complicated stuff and leaving the a-levels behind.

I frown once I walk outside and see that it has once again started raining and I didn’t bring an umbrella since I checked this morning and it wasn’t supposed to rain, but I guess that’s what you get for living in England.

I look around to see everyone rushing to their cars of running with someone as they try and fit as many people under an umbrella as they can. I sigh knowing that I am going to either run the race of my life or just accept that I am going to be sick tomorrow and just walk home.

“Looks like someone needs help.” says a voice beside me and I tense up knowing that it’s Jake as he has made it his mission to pop up around campus out of nowhere and bug me. I would not mind if he just wanted to be my friend or just toned the awkward flirting down but that’s not the case and he makes me uncomfortable.

I go to open my mouth and decline his offer that I know was coming but an arm comes around my waist, tugging me back into a hard body that I know too well and I can feel his chest rumble as he almost growls at Jake.

“She doesn’t need your help.” Mike glowers from behind me and if not for who the words are directed to then I would have pushed him away and walked away but I want Jake to go and if I have to let Mike deal with it then I will selfishly let him do this.

“Who are you to know what she wants?” challenges Jake while staring Mike down, not showing an ounce of fear at the subtle threat from Mike.

“I know her better than you do and she is coming home with me, back to our home.” Mike growls at Jake before grabbing my hand and pulling me away from Jake and towards one of the gates of the campus, in the opposite direction of where we live.

“Where are you taking me, let go!” I hiss at him quietly as he doesn’t slow down even after we make it to the parking lot and we are drenched in seconds, making the last 20 minutes completely pointless.

“Just shut up.” he snaps at me and I am taken back at how hostile he is towards me without an explanation or apology from this morning.

“Is she bothering you babe?” comes a sickening sweet from beside us. I turn towards the voice as I don’t recognise it and didn’t think the words were aimed at us since I don’t know who would be calling Mike ‘babe’.

“Who are you?” I ask before I can think about how I sound and now I am the one sending silent threats.

“I’m Alyssa, Mike’s girlfriend.” the woman replies with a smirk on her face and suddenly the freezing rain is nothing compared to the hit my heart just took.

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