Trusting Him (Journey to Love, #2)

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10. Approved


Lily’s POV

“Are you guys going to finally admit that you’re dating?” Hope speaks up as we down at the pub grabbing a quick drink. There is a small part of me that starts panicking at her words, just because I really like Jules doesn’t mean that I still don’t have my issues with relationships in the first place.

“Don’t say big words, you’re going to scare her away.” Whispers Jules from beside me and everyone starts laughing but me. I’m not mad at him but does he have to be so damn perfect all the time?

“I should have never invited you both to the same party, you’re sick together.” moans Joe from beside Jules. I know he’s trying to rile us up or scare me, I don’t know which but weirdly his words have the opposite affect on me. It makes me happy when people think that we make a good couple.

“You know we were bound to meet somewhere.” replies Jules again and as cute as it is, I don’t share his sentiment. I don’t believe that some people are just bound to meet, I’m very happy that I did but if it wasn’t for Joe’s party then we never would have met.

“How you’re this romantic and have a dick is beyond me, Lily is less of a pussy than you are.” Joe jabs at Jules once again and this time I laugh alongside all of them. I know that they don’t mean it when they throw insults at each other and it’s actually pretty funny how bad Jules is at insulting other people.

“You’re just mad because you are a dick.” He throws back at him and I laugh maybe a little too loudly. But I have to give it to him, this insult is much better than all the rest he has been giving out, maybe I am starting to rub off on him and transferring some of my bitchiness to him.

It might only just be a couple of us out on this cold night in March, but the place is packed and the atmosphere is light. Hope is here without any of the guys, even though she is looking much happier than a couple of weeks ago. I have yet to get all of the details from her but just from the smile on her face I can tell that any issues she was having have been mostly resolved.

Good, because I love seeing her happy.

It’s just Hope, Jules, me, Joe and a couple of his friends who started off at our table but have since moved over to the darts where there is a group of girls. It feels intimate to have such a small group of our closest friends and at the same time Jules has his arm around my shoulders and my hand is in his lap. There is no mistaking that we are out as a couple.

I think this is the first time we have been with our friends like this, and I don’t have the urge to jump out of my skin and run out of the door. It’s the little changes in myself that I have been shocked by the most, I never thought that I would be able to have such a normal night out.

I was never really addicted to the alcohol but maybe I was drawn to the idea that going out and drinking was going to make the demons inside my head quiet for a little while. Of course, that never lasted long and it never worked.

Jules has been some kind of light that has come into my life out of nowhere. I don’t know how I expect people to meet but something as random and boring as meeting at a New Year’s party in my head doesn’t create a good start for something that should last. But here we are, nearly 3 months later and I am more than warm to the idea of having him as my boyfriend.

I already know that Hope approves of him, the very little I have told her about him and what has been going on between us. That is also another thing that I am trying to work on. I have to stop shutting people out, I did it with Jules and I’ve done it with Hope.

Little by little I am seeing these changes in myself, these little things felt impossible a couple of months ago and yet here I am doing them. But like every time something good happens in my life, I am scared of the way it is all going to come tumbling down.

I am afraid of losing everything I have gained, that’s the side effect of being happy that no one tells you about. When you are happy you actually have something to lose, before I had material things to lose but it also felt like life was going to take them away from me anyway so I might as well expect the worst.

“You can’t seriously expect me to believe that you made a woman pass out simply from gazing at your huge dick?” Is the sentence that breaks me out of the weird fog my brain was in and those were also the last words I ever expected to hear come out of Hope’s mouth, I always thought of her as the young and innocent little girl.

But I guess when you have been fucked by three sexy guys, it tends to loosen you up a bit and you no longer worry about swearing or being brass.

The other thought that flies through my head as I process her words cause me to throw a sharp side glance at Jules. I have seen his dick, it is mighty impressive and he knows how to work it but I do not want to think about some other woman looking at what is mine.

“You can choose to believe whatever you like but the woman passed out as soon as I got my dick out of my pants.” Joe throws his hands up with a smirk on his face and my body relaxes when I realise they weren’t talking about the dick attached to my boyfriend’s body. It’s just Joe trying to impress and shock Hope because he doesn’t know her that well.

“She was probably drunk out of her mind and you got lucky she didn’t throw up on you.” She replies and I am proud of my little girl for holding her own. It’s a weird feeling that I am having for the first time seeing two friends that I am close to in different ways and are parts of my life in different ways banter with each other.

I might have always been the one with her mouth open all of the time and talking for a dozen people, but I’m enjoying sitting back and listening to them bicker while enjoying the feeling of Jules’s body pressed against my side.

“Are you telling the fainting story again?” laughs Dillon as he joins us back at our table but Max is nowhere to be seen. I chose to keep my mouth shut when I realised what story he was going on about because he tries to impress me with it the first time we met as well. It also doesn’t help that the girl in the story was the sister of a girl that lived in my building.

“You’re just hating because my dick is more impressive than all of yours combined.” Joe huffs and pouts like a little kid that his trick didn’t work yet again.

“I hate to break it to you Joe but Hope is dating an engineer and I’m dating Jules, so your tales about your dick aren’t as impressive as our realities.” I break in and throw him a wink, but I’m glad he knows I’m just teasing him. But in reality from what little Hope has told me, all of her guys are talented in the sack and my own reality is that I have a sexy Frenchman in my bed.

“You and your sick relationships.” He moans once again but chuckles once he points out the fact that Jules is blushing. I love giving him random compliments here and there and it’s even better when they’re a little suggestive and I get to watch him figure out how to react.

“I’ve got to say, I never thought you would end up with a girl like Lily but man is she perfect for you man.” Laughs Dillon and it’s such a little comment from his side but it means so much to me. This night feels like the final stamp of approval from our friends and now I see nothing holding us back.

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