Tear In My Heart

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German Construction Workers (Bonus)

Madison’s POV

There was no greater feeling than a stranger grinding on you on a Friday night.

The way the bass of the loud music courses through you and the crazy lights along mixed with the feeling of someone as lost and desperate as you felt amazing. Unbeatable. Especially when that person may or may not be the same sex as you and no one bats an eye. Even when you sloppily make out in the middle of the dance floor, no one tells you to leave or bugs you, they just let you drown deeper and deeper into your future regret. Shot after shot. Kiss after kiss.

Like I said, amazing.

I didn't know the guy skillfully moving his body against mine, but I knew I was probably going home with him to make some questionable decisions and undoubtedly regret them. But regret was a problem for the morning. Tonight, I just wanted to get lost.

The guy- Anthony? Paul?- turned to me with a drunken smile before he slung his arms around my neck and we swayed to the bass driven music. I threw back another swing of the drink in my cup I was holding, finishing it out. It burned as it went down and my thoughts became more and more distorted. Yeah, I was definitely going home with him tonight. I flashed him a grin, causing him to lean in and kiss me. He tasted like vodka and Red Bull. I smiled and pulled away. "I'm gonna get some more," I said as I shook my empty cup. "Want anything?"

He grinned as he bit his bottom lip, looking me up and down. I loved the lip biters. "I want something, but not here," he said suggestively.

"You'll get it soon enough," I said, equally as suggestive before I turned and headed back toward the bar for my fourth or fifth round. I think the alcohol was finally starting to do its thing.

I crashed onto an empty bar stool and gave the bartender a curt nod. "Another round." He looked me up and down as if trying to determine my drunkenness before he sighed as if to say "f it" and started getting me what I wanted. As I waited, I looked around me. A couple stools to my left were two girls really getting it on and on my right-

I was interrupted by another body crashing into mine. I was ready to let them have a piece of my mind but when I turned around...wow. There was a boy about my age who looked way too innocent and too much of a novice to even be here. But my...he was breathtaking. His hair was messy but in an attractive way. He was built and toned and had beautiful eyes that were looking apologetically at me. "Sorry," he bashfully stated.

I couldn't help but smile. "You're alright." I used my head to motion to the empty stool next to me. "You want to sit?" I asked, still smiling.

He offered me a smile of his own as he sat down, showing off his dimples. My heart fluttered. I was a sucker for boys with dimples.

He was more beautiful up close. His doe eyes held a bit of mischief and longing. The way he moved was free yet calculated. He was new to this.

"Hey, I think you're hot. I'm Noah," we're the first words out of his mouth, and right then my heart gravitated toward him.

I smiled. "Hey Noah, I'm Madison. You're pretty hot yourself."

He gave me a smile of his own, a bit bashful. Cute. The bartender slid me my drink, but I barely noticed it. I wanted to remember this.

"You wanna dance?" He asked, cupping my cheek with a hand. I looked back toward where the man I was dancing with had been but I didn't see him. Not that I really cared. I turned back to Noah with a smile and nodded.

"I'd love to."

He bit his bottom lip in an effort to hide his huge smile and I instantly decided that I liked the way he did it better than I'd liked anyone else doing it. He grabbed my hand and led me onto the dance floor. As soon as he'd found a place for us, he began moving. But he didn't move in an overtly sexual way. There was actually no "sexy" factor in his movements like there had been with the other guy. He was truly being himself. Free. He didn't care if he looked weird or if he was moving off beat and I liked it. He looked at me through his thick curtain of lashes, silently asking me to move with him. I complied. I wrapped my arms around his waist and carefully moved with him, aware that this was most likely his first time with another guy based on how tense he was. But he eventually relaxed and wrapped his arms around me too.

I closed my eyes and let all of the tension out of my body as I held on to the boy I'd just met like my life depended on it, our bodies moving perfectly as if we shared one soul that had been split into two vessels. His hips started skillfully moving against mine and a soft groan escaped my lips. He felt so good.

He looked up at me with a smile, proud he'd gotten that reaction from me. And as I looked down at him, my heart rammed in my chest. I had never wanted anything or anyone as much as I wanted Noah. Ever. And I wanted to hold on to him for as long as I could. As we continued moving, his hands wandered up and down my body. My lower stomach. My chest. My arms. Then finally interlocking behind my neck as he said, "I think I like you."

I grinned. "You don't seem too bad either."

His lips pulled up into a grin and I wanted to feel them against my own so badly. But I controlled myself, not wanting to risk rushing things and scaring him off. Seeing my struggle, his grin turned into a mischievous smirk as he leaned into me, his lips barely brushing up my neck, causing me to tense, before he reached my ear and whispered "Come get a drink with me," Without waiting for an answer, he laced his fingers with mine and pulled me through the crowd back toward the bar.

As the night continued, we shared gentle touches and messy laughter, especially when Noah drunkenly repeated "I want to be the German construction worker to your sidewalk", whatever that meant. To make things better, he was only over a year younger than me. And though I wasn't really one who believed in love at first sight, I think he changed that. I think. By the time the thirty minute closing warning was out, it was already two in the morning, but it felt like I'd just met him five minutes ago. Crazy.

I didn't want to say goodbye.

"So, uh, do you live nearby?" I asked as I stirred my water with my straw. I hadn't had another drink while I was with Noah. I wanted to remember all of this.

"Maybe," he said. "Do you?"

"Yeah. Less than five minutes away."

"I wanna go."

I was kind of taken aback by his bluntness, but it also intrigued me even more.

"Are you sure you wanna do that? I mean, I could drive you home if you want."

"You can't drive me somewhere you don't know, cause I won't tell you," he grinned.

I grinned and shook my head. "Noah...you're going to get me in trouble, you know that?"

He shrugged. "It's my specialty. Now," he said as he grabbed my arm and wrapped it around himself, "take me."

I thanked God that we were both of legal age.

It didn't take long for us to arrive at my apartment complex. Our laughter chased us up the stairwell as I helped drunken Noah up the endless stairs. When we entered my apartment, he instantly rushed to the bar and sat. I felt a bit conscious seeing that I had a fairly small apartment that wasn't necessarily the neatest. I mean, I'd walked out expecting to come home with someone no more than a sloppy one-night stand, but I ended up coming home with...him. I just didn't want him thinking bad of me.

"Can I get something to drink?" he asked.

"Sure. Like what?"

"Orange juice," he instantly said. "I don't care what brand or what kind. I just want orange juice."

I smiled and headed over to the fridge. "Luckily for you, I have a little bit left." I poured the drink into a glass and slid it over to Noah, who instantly picked it up to drink it, but it completely missed his mouth and got all over his shirt. I couldn't help but smile as he looked down at himself and frowned.

"I'm wet now," he pouted before looking up at me with his adorable eyes.

I chuckled and extended my hand. "Here, give it to me and I'll wash it."

He smiled before he did so without a second thought, showing off his toned, sculpted body. I had to force myself to look away as I took his shirt before I put it in the washer. Then I walked into my bedroom in an effort to search for a shirt to give him, but I heard movement behind me, causing me to turn around just to see Noah taking off his pants and discarding them on the floor near the bed. The moonlight pouring in through the window was the only thing illuminating his sculpted body.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I'm hot," he said lowly as he walked toward me, only stopping when there was less than a foot between us. I couldn't help but look him up and down. He was hot. "Let's do something," he softly said, the smell of alcohol clinging to his breath as he ran his hand up my inner thigh, causing me to suck in a breath and close my eyes in an effort to calm my growing excitement. He continued moving his hand up me until his fingers were tangled in my hair. "Am I making you excited?" he lowly asked, though we both already knew the answer. "Then let's do it."

Even in the dark, I could see the want, excitement, and a bit of fear in his eyes. And though every fiber of my being wanted him more than words could describe, I had to stop myself from giving into my cravings, no matter how good he felt against me. Not only was he drunk, but I was also most likely the first guy he'd been with and he deserved to have a special first time doing anything, even if it was just a simple kiss.

And I couldn't give that to him.

"I can't," I said, every syllable tasting bitter on my lips. "I'm sorry."

He frowned, but thankfully he didn't try to press it any further. "Will you at least lay with me?"

I grinned. "Yeah. I think I can do that." He smiled before he headed over to my bed, making himself comfortable in the sheets while I stripped down and slid on my pajama pants and slid in with him, opting to remain shirtless. Our feet were touching as we laid there looking up at the ceiling.

"Madison," he softly said in the darkness.


"I had a lot of fun," he said as he tentatively put his head on my chest. Once he saw that I had no opposition to it, he relaxed a bit. "Thank you."

"Me too," I honestly said, causing him to chuckle before his eyes flutter closed and he cuddled deeper into me. I couldn't help but smile. There was so much I wanted to give this boy in my arms even though I'd only known him for mere hours. But I couldn't. Maybe somewhere in another life we could've been, but right then, I decided that I was going to make the most of the moments we had and bathe in the glory of holding him right now.

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