Perfect Illusion

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Chapter 42: I Want You

The instant he takes my lips, fireworks explode in my body. All the pent-up desire of days and weeks have accumulated to this.


This is what I wanted ever since I saw the real him. This is what I was afraid of feeling, the feeling of being consumed with passion. This is what I finally have a taste of, and I’m not backing down.

Not now. Not ever.

My fingers stroke the nape of Daniel’s neck, pulling his head closer, like I can’t get enough.

His kiss completely obliterates me. He grips me tightly by the hips as I part my lips and our tongues meet in a frenzy. He brings his hands up and slide them through my hair, brushing his thumbs across my cheeks. We pull apart from each other to catch out breaths, our eyes still connected, never leaving each other.

“Alex...” He says under his breath, his fingers continuing to send sparks through my entire body by touching me everywhere. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for this.”

I take a fistful of his shirt and pull him towards me again. “Just shut up and kiss me.”

And then I bring his lips over mine again. His tongue slides over my lips, then dips inside, tasting me, devouring me.

Claiming me.

I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of his mouth.

Daniel drops his hand and rests it on my hip, while the other grips the back of my head, pressing our lips together. It’s a slower kiss, different than the first one. Our lips part again, and this time, he takes the opportunity to slide his lips down my jaw, giving me a hell of an adrenaline brush. I moan when his lips make contact with my skin, eager to feel more of him.

“Daniel...” I whisper his name in between breaths.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” He groans as I kiss his collarbone. “You’re going to be the death of me, I swear.”

I laugh, my breath against his neck. “God, I hope not. I don’t want you dying in the middle of something like this.”

He cups my cheeks, forcing my gaze to level with his. His expression is hard. “I don’t care if the world has been torn apart by earthquakes, tsunamis or hell, even a zombie apocalypse. Nothing is going to make me walk away from this. Nothing.” And then he seals my lips with another soul-shattering kiss.

We tangle ourselves in each other, my hands buried in his hair, his hands sliding down to cup my butt. I take that opportunity to wrap my legs around his waist. He grabs my face with his callused hands and drags his tongue from my neck, breathing roughly as he heads for my shoulder. A soft whimper feathers out of me as he tastes me again.

I murmur softly. “Please, Daniel. I want you.” I want him like I want my next breath.

He groans, pleased with my answer. “Where do you want me?” “Your room.” I manage to gasp.

He merely smirks. “You read my mind.”

With me still clinging unto his waist, he pushes the door open with his leg and drops me gently unto his bed. I begin to grow apprehensive. I tug on his T shirt, a smile playing on the edge of my lips.

“Take it off,” I tell Daniel. He chuckles and does what I say. When he chucks the shirt aside, I gasp at his beauty. From the top of his messy blonde hair to his full lips, down to his chiselled pecs and the tightly roiled stomach.

He’s so goddamn gorgeous. Every inch of him.

I place my hands on his shoulders and guide him down to the bed with me.

We roll over until he’s on top of me. He reveals to me another one of his sexy smirks before descending upon me again. There is little desperation in his next kiss, this time, his lips take their time on my collarbone down to my chest. Next thing I know my shirt is off and my upper area is exposed. As if on instinct, I fold my arms over my chest, shying away from him.

But he doesn’t let me. As he hovers over me, he pries my arms away, and a low, hungry sound rips from his throat. ”Don’t.” He tells me. “Don’t ever cover yourself up. If you’re with me, you can’t be embarrassed, okay? You have no idea how breath-taking you are.”

I can only nod. He tastes my skin, travelling from my shoulder all the way to the curve of my breasts, merely hidden by my bra. I gasp at his kisses, yearning more. He pauses, his lips hovering over my chest and he looks up to me, asking me for permission.

I nod again. He reaches around the clasp of my bra and unfastens it.

“Beautiful,” His eyes rake me, “Absolutely beautiful.”

My fingers wrap around the base of his neck and closes the remaining space between our mouths.

Daniel’s kisses are doing crazy, wonderful things to me. I whisper his name repeatedly like some kind of mad prayer. Every time we take off a piece of clothing, Daniel asks me through his eyes in a silent permission, asking me if it is okay to continue. And each time I tell him yes.

The rest of our clothes end up in a pile on the floor. The moment our bodies are flushed with one another, a sense of wildness overcomes me. I deepen Daniel’s kiss, telling him that I want this through my own kisses.

He pulls away slightly and frowns. “Are you sure you want this?”

“Christ, Daniel.” I roll my eyes. “Do I have to spell it out for you?”

“I’m just making sure,” He grins and then he reaches over to his nightstand and reveals a foil packet.

“Well, aren’t you prepared.”

“I wasn’t going to let this happen without any protection,” He says like its so obvious.

I laugh and peck him on the lips. “I hope you’re okay with this.”

“Why the fuck would I not be okay with this?” His hand trembles against my flushed face.

“I know.... I never told anyone this, but I haven’t done it before.”

The moment those words left my mouth, Daniel lifts his head, a shocked expression on his face. “You-you’re a... virgin?” He stutters, suddenly loosing his confidence.

My cheeks grow even redder. “I’m sure you’ve been with plenty of virgins before.”

“As a matter of fact, I haven’t.”

“What?” Now I am shocked. “You’ve been with so many girls, and you’ve never I don’t know... devirginized a virgin?”

Daniel bursts out laughing. “Devirginized? Really?” “I don’t know what you call it!” I say, exasperated.

He chuckles again. “I don’t know what you call it either. And to answer your question, no I’ve never slept with a virgin. So, I guess you can call this my first time too.”

“And you’re okay with that?” I ask him.

“I’m okay about you if you’re okay about me,” he says lowly, “I know I’ve um… done a lot of bad things in the past, and if you want out right now, I understand.”

I pull him forward and press a light kiss on his lips. “Daniel, I don’t care about your past. I don’t care about how many girls you’ve been with. I would still want you. I would still want this.”

He closes his eyes like what I just said is the confirmation he needs. His eyes flutter open, and he drops his head, our noses touching.

“I may have given myself away to my first, and more after that, but I swear, Alex, to heaven and back, that you’ll be my last.” I smile. “Good. Because you’ll be mine too.” And just like that, our promises are forever.

Somehow sensing my nervousness, Daniel’s next kiss is gentle and sweet. I sigh against his lips, feeling the last of my doubts slowly leave my body. Then, he’s everywhere- in every touch, every soft moan. I can’t tell where he is, he’s roaming everywhere all over my entire body, igniting the flaming passion within me.

I hear the crackle of foil, and I hold my breath. He looks down at me again, with doubt tracing his face. I know he’s going to try to ask me if I want this again, and I don’t know how to get it through that thick skull of his that this is all I ever want.

“It’s okay.” I murmur, reaching up to touch his face, a small smile forming on my face. He relaxes under my touch. “Daniel. It’s okay.”

His breath falters, his entire expression crumbling. “I’m just... I’m so afraid I’ll-” he pauses. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I trust you.”

He slowly nods, his breathing uneven.

I cling unto his shoulder, my fingers roaming over his back, clawing at it as he presses against me.

I feel pain at first, but after a while, Daniel slowly eases, and then the pleasure of it washes over me. Next thing I know, I’m gasping for breath, chanting his name over and over, and he does the same to mine.

We’re melting, entangling, colliding like we can’t get close enough to each other. It seems like these four months have finally dawned on us and we’re grasping for each other now, needing, wanting To feel.

To love.

Rivulets of sweat glisten on our skin as we familiarize ourselves with each other. Daniel and I mould together, clumsy, uncoordinated, but passionate and hard. I reach forward to kiss him, but my lips fall open into an ‘o’ as his pace quickens.

“Please,” I beg, “Don’t stop.”

He lifts his face just enough for me to see the small smile on his face. “I won’t. I promise.”

His words shatter the last amount of control I have left as I let myself to spiral into euphoria.

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