Someone please tell me how do I always get myself in theses situation. I’m standing here lying through my teeth, trying to rescue this girl with a smile that left me mesmerized the first time I saw her. So much so that I came back to this store for no other reason than to stand in her line and see that smile again. I have no clue what made me step in, I should have just walked away but I couldn’t when the soul reason for me being in this high price store was her. I couldn’t let this guy in his fancy suit try and take my future away from me. With that being said out loud it seems my inner monologue has become an outward conversation.
Crap did I just say that out loud, I can’t believe I did. I can feel her tensing by my words this just makes me pull her tighter. Especially since I see phones pointed at us from all sides, this isn’t going to be good. I’ve been trying to keep a low profile. Yeah good luck with that, when I just told the world that I’m engaged to a woman whose name I don’t even know. Fuuuuck, think fast, you got to think fast Jax. This is nothing, I got this I can get out of this; these people probably don’t even recognize me. That’s the hope at least because if this gets out I’m sincerely fucked up shit creek without a paddle.
During my exchange with no teeth I feel Sunshine relax in to me just a little bit and that makes this that much sweeter. It almost makes the shit storm that I know I’m going to have to deal with almost worth it. Lost in that feeling that she gives me I continue to fight her battle. This guy doesn’t seem to be buying my store. So I have to pull out the big guns, now this can go great for me or it can get me kick in the nuts. Looking down at her I want to take the chance, hell I can ice my nuts in the car.
I take her face in my hands and look her in her eyes. I’m trying to give her a chance to understand what’s about to happen here. Just before I close the space between us I see recognition and panic flash across her face, but it’s too late. Our lips touch and ok I’ve never been one of those sappy love metaphor type people but the sparks I feel from the moment our lips touch is ….is… I have no words to describe it; I just know that I never want them to stop.
To my surprise she doesn’t pull pack she doesn’t feel like a dead fish in my arms. I hope this doesn’t look awkward, like it’s our first kiss or anything. Hell I don’t care because she feels so damn good in my arms right now, I can give a rats ass how we look. Remembering where we are is the only reason I start to pull back because I’m ten seconds from carrying her right the hell out of here.
Reluctantly I end the kiss, I look down at her to make sure she’s ok and she is, she’s all smiles. Looking up at me with devilish promises in her smile and I must admit I want to take her up on them all. I kiss her lips one more time because I just can’t resist and pull her closer to me. I finally look away from her to notice that our audience has gotten a lot bigger but toothless is gone.
“Wow” she says after letting out a long breath.
“Wow indeed” I say back to her.
“Hey thank…..” she starts to say, but I’m noticing the on lookers not wanting them to catch anything that’s said next and the it doesn’t hurt that her lips are so fucking kissable I pull her close to me again and kiss her. This time it wasn’t for show it was for me. She melts into me so easily, the way her body molds itself to mine makes me hold her just that much tighter I’m almost afraid that this feeling can’t be real. Which means she can’t be real? But just as that thought crosses my mind she pulls back bites my lip and then kisses it.
“Hey, my shifts over at 5” she says with a wink and goes to help the next person in line. I’m left standing there willing my dick to not try to make an appearance because that has to be top ten sexiest things a woman has ever done to me. I nod my head then remember we’re supposed to be getting married she doesn’t know the hole I dug for us but I do and with that thought I walk to her kiss her temple and exit the bodega.
As I walk to my rental I look back and smile when I see she’s watching me smiling. Man that smile could light the entire state of New York in a blackout. That’s the thought rolling around my head as I walked back to my car smiling like an idiot. I can’t believe I took it as far as I did, what am I going to do if that gets out? Being who I am, in the position that I’m in I got to watch what I say. I have to control what information the media gets.
April’s going to flip if she gets wind of this she’s been saying for months now how I need to calm down and stay out of the press, that all press isn’t good press. I can practically hear her saying it right now. I roll up to the track for testing, my little hero act has caused me to be late. Walking into my hauler I see my crew chiefs face and I’m hoping that’s all it’ll cost me. He’s a little pissed that I’m late but I can’t be that late they haven’t even unloaded the car yet.
I go through my normal routine before I get into the car. I’m not going to lie its taking me a little longer to do things that are second nature to me. I hop behind the wheel because when I’m in this seat it seems to be the only time I can think straight. This is the easy part flipping switches pushing buttons and then she fires to life. I tell you this, there’s no better feeling then having 850hp under your butt. To go into a corner at speeds over 200mph is my church and right now after this morning my soul needs it.
I pull on to the track like normal and start to warm up my tires before I go out and try to lay a lap down. Once done and I’m up to speed I’m calm, I can’t explain it , I can hear everything and nothing at all it’s the best time to think . Now what in Sam hell made me jump into that mess this morning? Sunshine could have easily got herself out of that little situation, I don’t know how I know but I’m sure of it. So if that’s the case why did I feel the need to be her knight when she didn’t need one?
I have no clue what lap I’m on I know Boomer said do a couple laps and then come back in, seeing as he isn’t yelling over the radio for me to come in I think I’m ok. Wow I can still feel her lips pressed up against mine so soft and firm at the same time. She plays a game when she kisses, sometimes she’s the aggressor and others she simply melts and allows you to take what you need. Damn I could get use to those lips.
I guess I’ve been out too long because the next time I pass pit road I see arms waving. I look down and realize I’ve been pushing the talk button. No wonder I can’t hear Boomer or Chaz.
Boomer: “Hey what the hell is going on with you?”
Jax: “Nothing I’m good, why?”
Boomer: “You were supposed to make a 3 lap run.”
Jax: “Ok, so what’s the problem?”
Boomer: “You’ve been out there for 20 laps.” “Granted they’ve been fast laps, but still, bring her to me.”
Jax: “Coming in next lap.”
Boomer: “Umm Hmm.
I brake the car down to pit road speed and turn into the garages. Once the crew gets me into the stale Bummer walks up to the car, fuck he looks pissed. “Jax where’s your head at?” he asks more calmly then I expected. “My bad Boom, did I mess something up?” I ask he just looks at me as I get out the car. “You know usually I’d be pissed for the shit you just pulled, but considering you beat the track record and have no complaints about the car ….” He trails off; it takes me a minute to realize that he’s asking me how the car was. Truth be told I have no clue I was just driving. “I can handle the car.” I say and walk off; I’m agitated, no annoyed, no I’m... I’m. Hell what am I? I’m pissed as fuck because I know the stunt I pulled this morning is going to bite me in the butt. I know one thing for sure I can never do that again I could have killed myself and everyone here by not having my head in the game I’ve always had this level of disconnect on the track but it’s always been focus disconnect.
Fuck Sunshine you’ve gotten under my skin and you don’t even know it. What the fuck do I do now? She’s excepting me back at the bodega at 5. Do I go and figure out what this effect she has on me is or do I walk away, I’m good at that. I really want to see her again, but doing that could start all types of problems. Problems not just for me but problems for her as well, she seems too sweet for me to tarnish that smile with who I am.
Or can I?