Jacob doesn’t try to kiss me the rest of the time I’m here. We eat Chili and watch movies. Eventually, it stops snowing Jacob takes me for a ride on one of his horses. As we ride, I tighten my arms around him and lean against his back. I take in the scenery and I’m in awe. The light blanket of snow covers every inch of the land and it resembles something off of a Hallmark card.
When it is time for me to go back to campus, I dread it. On the way back, I get a text from Julius asking me to come see him. As much as I don’t want to, I decided that I should. I have a lot to say to Julius and he needs to hear me out. I ask Jacob to drop me off at the apartment.
When we pull into the drive way it’s night, Julius opens his door and walks up to the truck “Jacob, what the hell are you doing with her?”
“I came over to see you and she was out in the cold so I took her to my house to pass time. Why do you care, wasn’t Nora here to keep you occupied?” Jacob has an irritated look on his face and I am somewhat aggravated myself. Why was he being so protective and he is the one who put me out.
“Jacob thanks for everything. I can’t wait to come visit the horses.” I hug him tight
“No problem, Half Pint, Anytime” He says bye to me then Julius and I realize that no matter how much he likes me, Julius will always be his best friend no matter the situation.
I look at Julius and walk into the apartment. When he closes the door, he fixes me a mug of hot cocoa and sits it in front of me. The room falls silent before Julius speaks “Krystal, I need to explain why I asked you to leave. You aren’t going to like it, but I want to tell you the truth.”
I get nervous almost not wanting to know what when on while I was gone. Nora has shown me the kind of person she is and Julius’ opinion of her won’t change how I see her.
“Every time she comes around I am always reminded of what we had. I always get those old feelings back and I don’t know why. Nora tries to keep herself in my life just enough for me not to move on” He mumbles and a small fire builds in me
“So why do you let her control your life? I’m not going to compete for your attention or love when there are people out there who would gladly put me first in their lives” I sit the mug down and rub my forehead.
“Like who? Jacob?” He whispers
I look at him in his eyes “Yes, Like Jacob. And the sad part about it all is he still wants me and you to work out, but he has also shown me that I can’t just wait around for you. My life will pass me by waiting on you to realize that I’m here for you, not Nora. Why can’t you see that?” I feel a small lump in my throat. I’ve never been one to express my feelings this way but then again I’ve never had feelings like this.
“What happened at his house?”
I bite my bottom lip in frustration. I’ve never been one to lie and I’m not going to start now “I kissed him.” I didn’t want to blame Jacob when it was just as much as my fault that the kiss happened in the first place.
Julius groans and scratches his head “Do you want to be with him?”
“Honestly, if I and you don’t work then, yes. He likes me and I refuse to torture him with our relationship problems. One minute we are happy and great then the next Nora buts in. I can’t always wonder if today is the day Nora is going to come around and push me out of the picture”
He takes a deep breath “I’m sorry Krystal, I didn’t realize I was hurting you like this. And hurting Jacob. It’s not my intentions at all.”
I reach over and rub his arm “It’s okay”
He shakes his head “No, it’s not. I’m so close to losing you and I’m just now realizing it. I love you and I want to show you. I haven’t been doing that and I’m sorry”
A question probes my brain and I have to ask “What happened here while I was gone?”
I can tell he is uncomfortable with the question. I have no right to be mad if he kissed her, but I don’t know if I can take it if more happened. I sip my hot cocoa, trying to remain calm and understanding. I have to be open to whatever he has to say because I would feel worse if he didn’t tell me at all. I can’t have secrets in this relationship when the relationship itself is a secret.
“We kissed and she told me that she wanted me back. W....We went into the bedroom and I thought I could, but the scene of me and you making love in that bed kept playing in my mind and I knew I was making the wrong choice. So I asked her to leave and never come back. I was so close to messing this all up.” He shakes his head softly clearly feeling guilty and guilt probes me as well for kissing Jacob.
It’s quiet for a moment then I decided to take over “Julius we need to work this out. I leave in a week to go home for Christmas break and I don’t want to leave our relationship just dangling with a question mark. We both have messed up and we both have spoken our peace. We can either dwell on the past or live for the present and future.”
I stand up and take his hands “You and Nora, Over. Me and Jacob, Over. It’s just me and you”
He stands up and takes my face in his hands. Julius kisses me softly and then more eagerly. After a few seconds I pull back for air and he backs me into the wall. I wrap my arms around his neck and he lifts me up. Wrapping my legs around him, he grips my backside. He bites my bottom lip roughly and I moan against his mouth.
Julius puts me back on my feet and goes to the coffee table. He brushes everything onto the floor and lays me on it. As he pulls off my clothes roughly, I realize this isn’t the gentle Julius I was used to. He was rougher with me and the response from between my legs is rejoice. He kisses up and down my body, roughly scratching into my skin creating likes of red streaks. When he makes his way back to my lips, his fingers tangle into my hair and he grips it hard. His mouth trails down my jaw and bites my shoulder. I can only imagine what the marks on me look like right now, but I just know that they feel amazing.
His tongue makes a trail over my breast and his teeth find my hard nipple. I yell out as he nibbles on each nipple. The sensation sends my body into a frenzy. I push myself up and reach for Julius’ belt. He stands as I sit up on the table looking up at him as I unbutton his pants. I flick my tongue over the head of his swollen rod and a clear fluid leaks out. I lick it up before taking the head into my mouth. “Oh God” He whispers and I take him deeper into my mouth. His hand finds comfort on the back of my head and intertwines with my hair.
I continue to take him in my mouth till he can’t take anymore. He pulls my hair and I let my head fall back to look up at him. He continues to pull until I’m laying back on the table. With his foot, Julius spreads my legs. I catch a chill with his fingers rub over my clit.
“Turn over” He orders and I obey. I turn over onto my stomach and he reaches between my legs and continues rubbing. I close my eyes and lay my face on the cool wooden table taking in all the pleasure. When his finger enters me I gasp and he inserts another finger. As his fingers massage my inner walls, he drags the nails of his other hand down my spine. I want ever so much to feel him inside of me. “Please Julius” I moan out feeling as it I am being punished with near orgasms.
“Tell me you want me” He fingers me faster and I can feel myself begin to crumble.
“Please Julius, I want you” My nails dig into the table as I begin to feel an orgasm wash over me only to have Julius stop and remove his fingers.
I groan in anger and a dark chuckle escapes his lips. I kneels behind me and pulls me back by my hips until my knees touch the floor. I feel his hardness against my opening and I want nothing more than for him slam into me. He slides the tip in and stops. “Beg. Tell me you want it”
“Please Julius, I need it.” I moan. I push back against him and he groans, stopping me by grabbing my hips “No cheating, Ms. Smith” I close my eyes wondering how long this punishment would last. I have never been teased like this before and I hate it. My insides are on fire and only Julius can put it out. Julius takes his length and glides it over my aching clit then down to my opening, repeating the process a few times. It’s driving me into a frenzy. Suddenly, he moves back to ass. His member slips over the tight entrance and I gasp hard as he presses against it gently. No one has ever ventured there before and I was totally unprepared for it. I have always kept an open mind towards sexual experiences, but I never took Julius as an anal guy. He presses more and I feel the flame in my belly grow. The pressure dies and I am almost disappointed. “We will explore this area more, but not now”
I hear the rip of a condom and I feel happy that he is taking extra precautions. Once he has it on, Julius grips my hips and without warning, he slams into me. I yell out his name as he slams into me, rhythmically. An orgasms washes over me, but he doesn’t stop. I feel my thighs shaking as Julius pounds into me. He reaches around my waist and pulls me against him without stopping. His hand slides around and grips the front of my neck. I lean my head back against his shoulder as I push down on him allowing his hardness deeper inside of me. I hear Julius groan into my back as he nears his peak. With a few more hard thrusts, he bites into my shoulder and let’s himself crumble.
I fall onto the table in exhaustion and he lays on my back. As we catch our breath I laugh lightly.
“What’s so funny?” He huffs
“I want to fight more so we can have make up sex like that again”
He laughs and scatters kisses across my back. “I’m going to miss you over the holidays”
I sigh “Me too. I wish I could just be with you, but my parents expect me to be there.”
“It’s okay. I’m going to go home and see my folks. I haven’t seen then in a while”
“That’s good. I’m sure they will be happy to see you.” I smile.
“Yeah, but before we get into a conversation, I want to take this condom off.” He chuckles and gets up. I sit there for a moment trying to get the energy to get up.
Julius come back to me and lifts me up “Come on, little lazy.”
I groan wanting to go to sleep so badly. Julius takes me to the bed and lays me down.
“I hope you are ready for my final tomorrow” He mumbles
“Yes, I’m ready, of course. I could take your final blind folded” I throw a pillow at him, but he dodges it.
Julius crawls in bed with me and I lay on him. He rubs my head till I fall asleep. I have a weird dream about being in the woods and being lost. In the dream I’m walking by the same tree over and over not knowing which direction to turn until suddenly the trees part and I see the road. I walk down the road for what seems like hours. The dream lasts a long time before I jolt awake. I look over and Julius is sound asleep. I take a deep breath and close my eyes, but I can’t fall back to sleep. The dream sticks with me for hours until sleep finds me again.