I open my eyes and everything is a blur as tears pour out like a never before. My heart hurts so badly and I don’t’ know if I am going to make it. Julius rubs my head and lets me cry. I roll onto my side and my tears fall onto the carpet. Julius puts his mouth to my ear.
“It’s okay, he loved you so much both as a friend and more. He always wanted the best for you no matter how he felt. He would never want you to hurt like this.”
I cry harder gasping for air every few seconds. Julius plants kisses on my forehead and in my hair. My hand falls on his and I grab it and I squeeze it hard.
“I love you so much, Krystal and I’m here for you. I know I wasn’t here for you before, but I am now. I’m not going to let you hurt.”
After almost 30 minutes on that floor letting out every ounce of pain I had harbored, there was just me, one or two tears gently rolling down my cheeks, face red and puffy. I was limp and exhausted. As I began to fall asleep, Julius scooped me into his arms and carried me to the bedroom. He took off my shoes and jeans before throwing the covers over me. Mya comes in and kisses my forehead.
I fall into a light sleep when I feel Julius pull me to him from behind. His chest on my back calms me.
“I miss him ” I whisper as tears stream down my face and onto the pillow.
Julius holds me tighter “I know sweetie, I know. I miss him too” His voice is calm.
I grab his arm from around my waist and hug it tight to my chest as if it were a teddy bear. I feel small kisses on the back of my shoulder as Julius silently comforts me.
Through my tear induced congested voice I mumble “I love you, Julius. I love you so much”
With his mouth on my shoulder, I feel a small smile form “I love you too”
I fall into a deep sleep, almost like a coma since I’ve barely slept in a week and a half. I wake up briefly a few times and most of the time Julius is still holding me and other times I catch a glimpse of him walking to the bathroom or going to get water. I only awake for a few seconds at a time before sleep consumes me again.
When I finally awake, it’s dark outside. I rub my eyes and look at the clock. I blink a few times when I see that it’s midnight. I’ve been sleeping for about 10 hours. I sit up and look around wondering where Julius is. When my senses kick in, I smell food. I get up and go into the bathroom. When I look in the mirror I scan over my face. It didn’t look as tired as it had been looking lately. I splash some water on my face and exit the bathroom. I take my sweater off, replacing it with one of Julius’ V-neck shirts that was long enough to where it stopped at my upper thighs.
I walk into the living room and see Beanie in her bed. She lifts her head and walks to my feet, licking my toes. I scoop her up and proceed to the smell of the food. When I get around the corner, Julius is standing at the stove in his boxers finishing my favorite food, spaghetti.
“Mmm that smells good”
His head flies up “You’re up.” He walks over to me and kisses me “How are you feeling?”
I smile a little and take a deep breath “Pretty good. Still a little off, but a lot better.”
“Good. I’m sorry about earlier. I know it caught you off guard.” Julius kisses my forehead
“It’s okay. I’m sorry for....everything. Yelling, running, pushing, everything” I look down, but he lifts my face back up. “Don’t apologize. You were just trying to stay strong and it got overwhelming”
I lean into his chest and he wraps his arms around me “I’m here for you.”
“I know. I just didn’t think it was right to mourn, I was already feeling so guilty about having feelings for him” I mutter into his shirt.
“I don’t blame you for having feelings for him. I wasn’t treating you right, but I swear from now on you will be my number one.” I smile against his chest then I frown when my stomach growls hard, making groan.
“I’m so hungry” I giggle
“I figured you would be so I cooked. I need you healthy. Go sit on the couch, I’ll bring you a full bowl.”
The idea of that bowl of spaghetti made my mouth water. When he brings our food, I immediately dig into mine. My tummy welcomes the food with open arms. After eating twice, I lay in Julius' arms and we talk. I get teary eyed in some parts of the conversation, but it’s not as bad as earlier. When I think back to the scene, I don’t even recognize myself. I was a completely different person. A girl I didn’t know and didn’t want to get to know. Julius makes me promise that whenever I’m having a hard time that I will come talk to him and not hold it in. I decide to stay for the rest of the night since I have some clothes here already.
Around 2am I ask him to come shower with me and he nearly beats me to the shower. We haven’t seen each other naked since before break and that can be frustrating. When we get in the shower, I wrap my arms around him and we stand under the shower head and let the hot water beat down on us. We both feel a tremendous amount of stress off our shoulders and tomorrow is going to be a better day for all of us.
After drying off we crawl in bed naked and cuddle against each other. As I fall asleep, I think about Jacob briefly. This time I don’t get sad or teary eyed. I know he is in a better place. A happier place.
Knowing that makes me feel a million times better. I wake up and Julius is already gone to work. He took the liberty of putting Beanie in the bed with me and she was laying by my head licking my ear. I pet her little body and get out of bed.
On my way to class, I stop by the cafe to apologize to Mya. When she sees me walk in smiling, she runs from behind the counter and nearly knocks me over with her hug. “I love you, Krystal”
“I love you too Mya. I’m sorry about yesterday”
“No, no don’t apologize. You were just really hurt and I understand. It was just so sad to see you like that.”
“I know, but I feel better now so can you let me go before I suffocate?”
She lets me loose and laughs. “Free hot cocoa?”
“Yes please” I smile.
The rest of the day goes perfectly. I feel like the weight of the word is off my shoulders. When I walk into class on time, my teacher looks surprised and as I walk to my seat I swear I hear her say “Finally”
I look back to see if Eric is here, but he isn’t so I take my regular seat in front of the class.
On my way to class Friday, I pass by Julius’ class, but I stand far enough from the door so no one sees me looking in. He turns his head by chance and sees me. I smile and wave and he nods. I can tell his spirits have lifted these past 2 days by seeing me okay. I get to class on time and the teacher looks at me surprised for the second day in a row. Yesterday I sat in my regular seat, but today I decided to take my late seat by Eric as my permanent seat.
“Ooo, you look cute today”
“Thanks” I open my book and wait for class to begin
“I’m happy that you don’t look depressed anymore. I knew you were totally different when I met you. I just figured it was a bad day” Eric smiles and continues talking.
I actually pay attention and respond. I find out a little about him. He is actually a really funny guy. He is 20 and in his first openly gay relationship. His is going to school to be a journalist and so is his boyfriend.
When class is nearly over, Eric nudges me and points to the door. A tall handsome brunette guy is standing there waiting “Is that him?”
“Mmmhmm, isn’t he just tasty?” He chews the end of his pen and smiles
I laugh “He is very handsome”
At that moment, I begin thinking about Julius and how long it’s been since we have had sex. I begin to daydream about the last time we did when I was on the table and I feel the muscles in my core contract. I look at my watch and realize that his class is over. There are 5 minutes left and this lady refuses to let us go any earlier. I huff as I become more turned on. I pull out my phone and text Julius
Me: Hey lock you class door from the outside, I’ll be there in ten
J: alright. Is everything okay?
Me: just be ready ;)
As soon as she lets us out, I say bye to Eric and head to Julius’ class. When I reach the door, I tap lightly and he opens him. I close the door and make sure no one is looking as I close the shade covering the door window. I peek behind me and he has disappeared, but I know where he is. I drop my things by the door and go into the file closet. I just barely clear the door before his hands are on me and lips crashing into mine. He immediately pulls my shirt over my head as I undo his pants. Deep down I was a little nervous about having sex in the class, but my body just didn’t care.
“Oh, Professor Ingram, I have been a bad girl” I smirk and he groans hard. I look down and see his length straining against his boxers.
“And what do you think I should do about that?”
“Punish me” The words roll off my tongue so soft and I can tell Julius wants to explode.
Once I’m mostly naked except for my underwear, he takes his tie and pulls my arms behind my back tying them together tightly. I moan as I move my butt back so it presses against his swollen member. He pushes me against the cold wall and smacks my backside. I yelp and press my forehead against the wall.
“Seems you need a good spanking, now what should I use?”
Julius picks up a thin hardcover book then sits it back down
“Nah” He continues to look around then he sees it.
“Perfect” He picks up a wooden ruler and slides it across my butt. He taps it against my butt lightly then he pops me hard with it. I moan out and he chuckles.
“Does the bad girl like that?” He snakes his fingers in my hair and pulls my head back. It hurts, but nothing I can’t take.
He smacks again and it stings more. I ball my hands into fists as he spanks me hard. My breathing picks up and I become wetter, feeling the moistness between my thighs. When Julius is done spanking me, my whole backside is sore.
“You took it so well baby, you are such a good girl. We will definitely be doing more of that.”
The fact that Julius never expressed to me that he was into spanking and tying me up makes me wonder why. Maybe he thought I wasn’t into it or ready for it. When I first met him I was a nervous wreck around him. He always had a strange effect on me and it hasn’t changed, but now I’m just more comfortable with him. My breath hitches as he pulls my hips back and spreads my legs with his foot. I close my eyes and moan when he runs his fingers over my sex.
“Mmm, so wet” He fingers continue over my opening and he slides a finger into my depths, briefly, making me groan.
His fingers exit and slide back to my rear opening. He rubs around it with my own wetness and I moan as he slides his finger in. The sensation catches me completely off guard and chill bumps develop across my thighs. He works his finger in my tight entrance and my knees begin to shake. I feel his hardness poke my hand so I grab it. Julius groans as I start massaging his member. He pulls my hair harder as my hands bring him pleasure. Suddenly, he turns me around and puts his hand around my neck.
“On your knees.
I lower myself before never taking my eyes off his. His hard member is right in my face and I can’t help, but lick the head. I hear Julius’ breath hitch and my inner sex vixen takes over. I take him in my mouth and his head falls back. I suck hard, taking all of him in.
“Fuck,” Is all the escapes his mouth. As I work my mouth on him, I feel myself become wetter. I want him so badly.
Julius begins thrusting in my mouth matching my rhythm, feeling the head of his member tickle the back of my throat. I know he is getting close to exploding as his breath quickens and with his hand still in my hair, he pulls my head back. I gasp and look in his eyes.
“Do you want me?” He asks
“Yes.” I whisper.
“Tell me you want me to fuck you” He orders.
I blink a few times and he repeats the order. I have never been the type to say vulgar things and Julius knows that. I swallow hard and Julius pulls my hair again.
“Say it, Krystal”
I look towards my sex vixen to give me courage. I bite my bottom lip.
“I want you to fuck me”
The phrase sends a signal to my sex making me shiver. Julius lifts me onto the feet and slams his mouth into mine. As his tongue massages mine, his hands trail between my legs.
“You are so fucking wet” I moan in frustration. “Please.”
“Please what?” His face is so close to mine that his breath is my breath.
“Please fuck me”
Julius smirks and walks me over to the window. I get nervous thinking that someone is going to see, but the window is lightly blocked by a thin bush. We are still visible, but no one would think to look this direction.
He lets my hands loose, “Put your hands on the window” I comply and he pulls my hips back to him.
My eyes roll back as his hard muscle enters me. I let out a breath of relief as his pace picks up. Seconds later the sound of my backside smacking against his pelvis is the only thing that’s heard. I open my eyes and see people walking my, but no one thinks to look this way. Julius continues to pound into me and without thinking I yell out.
“Fuck!” My tongue was becoming comfortable with the word now.
I hit the window as the pleasure overwhelms me and my heart stops when I see someone stop and look around to see where the noise is coming from. Julius doesn’t stop as I half watch in fear. I close my eyes when I see the student walk away. Soon after I feel a huge orgasm wash over me. I yell out and Julius follows. I yelp when my legs go weak and I fall on my knees.
“Oh shit, Krystal” Julius tries to pick me up and I’m too busy laughing to help myself up.
Julius starts laughing and scoops me up. He pulls me into his arms “It’s so nice to hear you laugh again”
“It’s good to laugh again.” I kiss his neck “I love you, Julius”
“I love you too, Krystal”
We get dressed and I pull my hair into a ponytail. Julius kisses me before I leave and I walk out of the class as if nothing has happened. My sexual relief cleared my mind and made my day. I see a lot of better days in my future.