“Oh no! Why do I look so much like her? I don’t understand it at all,” I said as loudly and clearly as I could.
The device had a red light blinking over it and I knew it was recording whatever I was doing and speaking. Not only one, but Zachary found three devices hidden secretly in my apartment in order to record the things that were happening. At first, I had no idea about this but Zachary was clever enough to search for it and he got because according to him, he believed our enemy was not dumb enough to let me live freely. He would definitely check and would have me under watch and these peculiar voice recording devices are just a mere part of it.
But fortunately, Zachary could edit the records all by himself. It meant even if it recorded our conversations, he could edit it and keep the parts that he wanted Alex to know. It was why I had to go on shouting around behaving as if I was Ivona so that it could record my voice and he listens to it and rests assured that indeed I had no memory of Juliette. I had marked him taking the devices with him whenever I wasn’t around so that he could hear it all.
If it wasn’t for Zachary we would’ve long been caught.
I raised my eyebrows at him asking him if it was okay for me to stop now but then he made a few circles in air using his finger and his cation told me that I should carry on the act a little further.
“No! This all are just rubbish things. I must concentrate more on Alex for now and moreover, that guy seems to have a girlfriend now, I wonder if he would disturb me and Alex any further,” my eyes trailed off to Zachary who was busy in counting the red lights blinking on that small device under my coffee table. All of a sudden anger boiled up inside me for Zachary wasn’t paying attention to me and his less reaction on the word ‘girlfriend’ irked me.
As if noticing my gaze upon him he looked up at me and raised his eyebrows probably asking me why I had stopped talking but instead I got up from the sofa and wore my coat before striding up towards the door, silently. He seemed to caught off guard by my actions because he sat there silently observing my actions with a confused look but as soon as I was out of the door he was right on his foot following me out.
I looked back at him to find him adjusting his hood to hide his face and I stopped on my tracks when I stood right before the elevator and punched the switch angrily waiting for the elevator door to open.
“What’s wrong with you? Where are you going?” he asked and I looked back at him with a sharp gaze. At the moment, I had a sudden desire to kill him.
“What’s wrong with you?” I mocked his voice in my mind.
“Juliette? I’m talking to you,” he said and that made me look back at him. I knew I was angry for nothing but the reason that there was nothing that should make me angry had me angrier upon him. I knew he loved me and only me but still, I was angry upon him. I knew he was doing the same thing that I was doing. I was with Alex unwillingly while he was with that woman...although she was being paid for it for an act but still thinking about that woman had me miffed.
“Juliette?” he called my name. His eyes had been portraying a lot these days or was it me who was able to read it. It was so clear and it was as if I could see the real Zachary who no one ever did. They seemed happy yet dark for some certain reason. Perhaps, he was sad like me for staying away from each other like this. We have been separated a multiple of times now yet fate doesn’t seem to be tired of separating us and here we were acting as if we had nothing to do with each other.
He must be suffering from the inside.
Zachary, why do you still hide your feelings from me?
I am really sorry. It’s all my fault. If only I had listened to you and hadn’t pulled you into all this then we would’ve somewhere else probably enjoying our lives.
But you were always involved whenever it was something related to me. You’ve always protected me and it still is even though you have to stay away from me. I want to hug you and tell you that I love you so much that words can’t even describe. At that moment when I thought I was dying back in that water, all I thought was about you.
I thought about you when I was dying.
I was worried for you thinking how would you react if I didn’t get back to you.
I’m sick and tired of dragging you into my problems. I’m tired of seeing in pain.
Can’t we just end this and live a life away from everyone peacefully like those happy fairytale endings?
I want to live peacefully with you. I want to have kids with you and I want to grow old with you.
Just why did I even plan this game in the beginning?
It would’ve been a lot easier if I hadn’t sent Willie after you to stop you from killing Alex. It would’ve ended then and there but then we would’ve never known who was the person behind it all.
What the hell am I even thinking?
I held my temple frustrated by myself.
How could I even think like that?
I can never let Zachary kill someone ever again.
For a moment, I grew selfish and thought all those absurd things and that made me upset.
“Are you even listening to me, Juliette?” I heard his voice and looked back at him to find him staring at me intently.
“What’s wrong?” he asked and all I wanted at that moment was to hug him tight and never let him go.
Too preoccupied with my feelings, I didn’t even realize when I moved further wanting to hug him and he knew my intentions because he smiled and opened his hands for me to fall into his arms but then the elevator door pinged open and I looked back the door when Alex stood right before me with a smile on his face.
“Ivona, hey!” he smiled and walked forward and pulled me into his arms, surprising me with his actions. I looked back at Zachary to find him standing with his back facing towards us. Unlike me, he was quick enough to react and as Alex hugged me he walked to the elevator and hurriedly pressed the switch. But as the door of the elevator closed, his eyes met with mine, it was filled with sadness and sorrow.
My eyes teared up as I knew I was again the reason for that emotion that I saw in his eyes. It is really hard to see the person you love in somebody else arm. It was how I felt when I saw Loana Ularu and that woman from the previous day next to him. My palm formed into a fist when I realized how much I hated myself for doing this to him but this was all because of him. The guy who was hugging me.
The root of all these sufferings.
Could I be the one to end this all?
A realization hit me suddenly when I thought about it for the first time ever.
What if I end this all by myself? Can I protect Zachary?
Currently, I am the only one close to Alex. Even if its an act from my side and I know he is into it as well playing his side of the role of being my fiance I still have a chance to get close to him and I can kill him.
Yes, I should kill him and then it will all be over and I wouldn’t have to stay away from Zachary.
“Where were you going?” he asked as he looked at me and I looked back at him forcing a smile.
“I wanted to get some ingredients. I wanted to make soup,” I said and he nodded.
“Oh alright. I hope you can share your soup with me,” he laughed and I nodded but balled my fist inside my coat.
“I will go get and get your ingredients, you can go back to your room. It’s cold outside,”
“Alright,” I muttered and turned around walking back towards my apartment. But my mind kept on thinking about the idea that I thought a few minutes ago.
“Actually, you know what?” I heard him and turned back to look at him raising an eyebrow questionably.
“Let’s get to the nearby restaurant to have dinner,” he smiled.
The place was crowded but was comfy. It was a family restaurant were average class people came with their family. Somehow I was grateful that he brought somewhere like this but then a scowl formed on my face thinking why would he who throws his shoes if it has mud on it and loathed poor people would ever bring me to a place like this?
I was tired of those fancy restaurants where you have to whisper to talk, take small amounts and wipe your face after every single bite to maintain decency of your high-class family. In those restaurants, people judge you by the dress you wear. The more the price of your dress, the more is the value of the person. You will get attention only if you have money in your wallet and people go their with their family not to have a stomach full of supper but to show off others that they have the status to come and eat in the restaurant. I was tired of it.
“I know, I know that you don’t like this place. You don’t like this place, its nothing like the restaurant we usually go but trust me, they have the awesome food served over here. Far much better than those five-star restaurants,” he smiled and looked around for a waiter when we sat down in the corner of the restaurant.
You don’t really know me, bastard!
“Alright, so how do you know about this place?” I asked seeming curious.
“This place....” he had a pleasant smile plastered on his face from the time we came here and he looked around as if reminiscing something.
“Has a special place in my heart,” he said and looked back at me. His finger trailing over the rim of the glass.
“I used to come here with my mom,” he said and I responded with an ‘oh.’
“We used to come here every time I scored more in my school and every time I won a medal or trophy. We used to come here to celebrate,”
“I see,” I said. I was not really interested to hear his melodramatic story when he has turned my life into a melodrama. Still, we chatted and waited for the food that he had ordered for us.
“Truly, the food was awesome,” I said as I wiped finger using a tissue.
“I told you,” he grinned like the Cheshire cat and went to the counter to pay the bill. I was gulping down the glass of water when my eyes fell on the knife on our table. A lot of questions formed on my mind and I thought about it multiple times when a voice behind me startled me “Shall we?” Alex asked as he looked down at me. I nodded and got up wearing my coat.
We walked out of the restaurant and back towards the isolated parking lot but then I took it my chance to shove my hands back into the coat pocket and fish out the knife that I had managed to steal at the last moment, sneakily. I held it ready to strike him while he stopped in the middle looking at his phone screen.
My hands trembled and I couldn’t really breathe thinking that I was going to kill someone, but my mind was dead set. Counting internally, I closed my eyes and stroke as hard as I could wanting to stab his back but then I felt someone holding my hand stopping me. My eyes snapped open only to find Zachary in the middle. He took or more like snatched the knife away from me and glared at me before running towards the car beside me and seating inside while Alex turned back to face me.
“What? What happened to you? You look as if you have seen a ghost,” he joked but I could feel my heart pounding.
Oh no! What was I doing?