Blue Dreams

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Afterword: A Third Alternative

The story ends with how the reader answers the question: do you believe in happy endings? The epilogues are written for those who need an answer to what happens after. Choose based on your answer, but...

There is a breed of readers who want to believe that Sandy’s prayer was answered and that she did go to Dwayne on New Year’s Eve, but that this did not result in happily ever after. You choose to believe that they were happy at first, but eventually divorced, or stayed together in misery, or that life treated them so harshly that, even though their love survived, their story could not be considered by any stretch of the imagination a happy ending. You are a stubborn breed and no epilogue would satisfy you. You need a sequel which would not be Blue Dreams. Call it Stark White Realities. Write it with the twists, complications, heart breaks and new joys you can imagine. Make it about desires, regrets and yearnings. It is not that you do not want or can’t believe in happy endings. It is that the characters and life story means so much to you that you will sacrifice the happy ending to the ongoing journey. God bless you. You are the reason good story telling never ends.

As for me, the omnipotent narrator and author, who decided to have the reader choose, do I believe in Happy Endings? It depends on the moment I am living. What day is it and what time? I am a woman who does not believe in an omnipotent God, but who has gotten down on her knees. I am a woman sometimes lost and sometimes found; sometimes strong and sometimes weak. I am a woman with the arrogant self-reliance of Sandy and the belief in the meaning of Happily Ever After as Dwayne defines it. I am a woman who has yet to meet my soulmate, but when pondering a past love that I know was not my true love, I still cling to the fact that I made a vow before God (the omnipotent God in whom I do not believe). Do I believe in happy endings? I want to believe. How could I have written a novel such as Blue Dreams if I didn’t believe? Yes, I believe. I know the man who entered my dreams to help me write this novel exists and I will meet him someday. Except I know I won’t. My brain made him up as a means of escape. But if I were to meet him, I could believe. Except, I would likely screw it up. Perhaps, it is best we never meet. Yes, I believe in happy endings and I want to meet him. No, I do not believe in fairy tales. Do I believe in happy endings? Maybe? If true love and happily ever after are myths, then they are myths I can’t resist. I wrote Blue Dreams and I go through the motions of it all in the quest for the myth. I am a woman growing old. Yet, the journey onward goes…

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