Chapter 17 - Maddie
I looked up at Nathan when he walked into my hospital room. I was reading the book Maria had got me yesterday and it was okay but I couldn’t hold it so it was awkard to read. “Hey kiddo how you coping that’s a lot of sweets.” Nathan said coming in the room. he hung his jacket on the back of a chair and I smiled at him and put the book down. “Marias trying to make me fat.” I said. “it wont work.” He told me. “shes hopeful.” I told him. “she said its her new diet. Make herself look thinner make her friends fatter.” I told him what Maria said. “Did you have a nice meet up with them. Im sorry it was in the hospital.” He said sitting down. I took hold of his hands. “it was okay, do you know when I can get out of here. Or at least get the cathertier out?” I asked him. “the doctor will be along in a bit I think.” he told me. “good I know going toilet will be hard but I would prefer it.” I told him. “Nathan.” I started worried. Should I ask him I was possibly being silly. “what kiddo?” he asked worried. “how are the kids?” I asked worried. “I don’t pay you enough.” He told me. “that good?” I asked. “fire soccer date.” He started. I laughed. That’s when the doctor came in. “I see my patient is a lot better today.” He said with a smile. He started going over everything. He wanted me to have another transfusion but wanted to wait 48 hours. So I wasn’t going anywhere for a while. My leg had apparently a plate now and he recomened physico therpy. My shoulder was another story but he didn’t see there being any perment damage although he said tennis might be an issue for me jokingly. I knew I was lucky at the end of the day. I asked about the catheriter, he said to give it another few days as I couldn’t use crutches with my shoulder so would be bed bound a while. Or wheelchair bound. “is there any rush to have the bed? I can get Maddie a wheelchair and put her in the pool house.” Nathan started. The doctor said he would prefer me under ops anyway due to the amount of blood I lost and prehabs the end of the week we could discus it again. Nathan talked to him. “Are my tablets meant to make me tired?” I asked. I was assured that was a mixture of the blood loss and my new pills. But I would be back on my feet soon. When he left Nathan gave me an encouraging smile. “Nathan.” I started worried. “yes sweetheart.” Nathan said. “I might be being stupid.” I started. “no sweetheart your never stupid.” Nathan assured me. “What happened to James did someone shot him?” I asked. “He was shot yes.” he said truthfully. “is he alive?” I asked, I hoped he was. I didn’t know what had happened but I hated the idea he was dead because of me. yet he had tried to kill me! “Hes alive he was only shot the once in the shoulder to disarm him.” Nathan told me. he kissed my head. “hes going away for a long time this time Maddie.” He assured me. “Did anyone else get hurt?” I asked worried. “a cop got shot Maddie but is making a brilliant recovery ive been told.” Nathan assured me. “They got to us quick.” I said. “they were already outside the house. But watching the front gate not the back.” Nathan said worried. “you really thought he was going to try kill me.” I said weakly. How had it gone like that. “His threat had to be taken seriously.” He told me. I nodded worried. Nathan seemed to think. “I never told you what happened when you were 19.” He said. “He did armed robbery and got put away.” I said. “it wasn’t just that Maddie.” Nathan sighed. “we had a private investigater on him.” Nathan said. “okay.” I said. “The day you walked away from him.” Nathan started. “He bragged to a friend that he was dating a rich girl and her family would pay a lot for her kidnap.” Nathan said. “it was all words.” Nathan started. “He was going to?” I asked scared. “I never really found out. he claimed it was just banter with a friend and it was dismissed in court. It shouldn’t of been given what he tried.” Nathan said. I swallowed. “I thought he loved me.” I said tears running down my face. “I just wanted to protect you baby and the knowledge didn’t help you. I thought you were trying to move on.” He said weakly. “I was trying to.” I assured him. “I don’t think I can feel safe with a guy again.” I said truthfully. “Maddie when you meet the right guy youll feel safe.” He asured me stroking my hair. “I doubt it.” I said. “Nathan.” I said weakly. “yes Maddie baby.” Nathan said. “I know this sounds stupid, I hate the fact I cant even stop thinking about it.” I started, did I really want to ask. I could go the rest of my life without know. “Whats wrong baby?” he asked me worried. “Were Addie and I adopted.” I asked. he froze, his reaction was enough. He would of said no straight away if we weren’t the fact he froze told me my answer. I swallowed. “But mom and dad had birth pictures of us.” I said weakly. Nathan took a deep breath. “Kiddo.” He said weakly. “why do you think your adopted?” he asked me. Wasn’t i? “Addie and I were A- blood, mom was a B+ and dad a 0- I wouldn’t be an A- if they were my parents.” I said weakly. “Maddie I need you to understand.” Nathan started worried. “Jessica and I were extremely young.” He said. I knew it was coming I think deep down I had known since the moment Maria had got me thinking about my blood. “You didn’t want us?” I asked. “Maddie we wanted you both. Hell we wanted you both.” He assured me. he went to squeeze my hand but I pulled away from him and he knew he had to be gentle with me. “why have you never told me?” I asked. “We were going to tell you.” He said. “when? When I figured it out?” I asked. “no your 16th birthday.” He admitted. “its what we always planned. We knew it would be differcult for you and Addie but we did it for you both.” He told me. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked. “your mom had just passed away.” he said. “my grandmother.” I said weakly. “no Maddie sweetie don’t think like that. She rasied you and loved you and Addie she was your mommy she always will be your mom. I don’t want you to ever think of her as anything less.” Nathan said. “Jessica and I were 17 when you were both born.” He said. “we were in our last year of highschool.” He said weakly. “We knew we needed a college education. Your dad.” He started. “your grandfather insisted we got our college education.” He said. I knew what dad was like. But I still didn’t understand. Could they not have told us the truth. “You and Addie were so special to us. We came back as much as we could.” Nathan said. “we tried to be there for you both as much as possible.” He said. “Jessica and I weren’t even sure if our relationship would last outside of highschool. But you girls.” He started. “you kept us together. I loved you both. I loved you three.” He said. “I will always love you and Addie. Madeline.” Nathan told me. “So we weren’t mistakes?” I asked weakly. “No Maddie you and Addie. Were never a mistake you were our everything. We had everything with you two. We had a family. We had college and we had each other.” Nathan said. “When we came back when you were both 5.” Nathan started. “we actully had a lot of arguments with your parents.” He started. “why?” I asked. “we thought we were ready to raise you both.” He said. “But you didn’t?” I asked. “your mom and dad were your parents and you both would have been to hurt to move you then to be with us. We decided to keep with the orgianal plan and tell you when you were older.” He said. I nodded weakly. “When we lost Addison.” He started he choked up. he always did, it hurt him to talk about her. I always knew that. But now I saw more into it. It wasn’t just Jesses younger sister. It was his daughter. “When we lost Addie. It almost killed us that we weren’t there.” Nathan said. “We didn’t realise she was going to go down hill so quickly. the chemo was working. It was just a hightemperture we were told.” Nathan said. he was hurt. “I admit if we had known I would have been at hospital that day and not picked you up.” He said. “but kiddo I never regretted picking you up. then with what you said to me in the car that day.” He said. I swallowed. “You were so scared sweetheart.” He said. I didn’t know what to say. “when you said to me, im alone now aren’t I. it broke my heart I didn’t want you ever to feel alone.” Nathan said. “you were 7 and scared and alone. Your twin sister had just died. Youd never been apart.” Nathan said tears run down his face. “You were so hurt and there was nothing any of us could do to help you. Your dad.” He started. “he seemed the only one to know how to help you. You were always such a shy little thing. You weren’t.” he started. “brave.” I said. “oh no baby you are and always will be the bravest little girl ive ever known. You used to sit and hold Addies hand whilst she underwent such horrible chemo that we couldn’t even watch. You never let her be alone or feel sorry for herself you will always be my brave girl. To brave sometimes.” He said. “it was when you were 7 that Jess and I started telling you that it was okay.” He started. “not to be.” I said weakly. “you were trying to be strong for everyone but you were breaking. We all knew you were in mourning the doctor called it twinless twin syndrome.” Nathan said. “You would do some thing and look for Addie and then I would see the hurt to not have her to tell. You wouldn’t open your birthday presents or Christmas presents. You never put down her toy and would sleep in her bed. Well cry yourself to sleep in her bed. None of us knew how to help you.” He said. “You started putting everything you had into math and your grandad he thought it was okay, that you were always quiet and loved math so it was fine.” He said. “We should have been there better all 4 of us.” Nathan said. “You were 7 and trying to cope with the death of your sister. Of your best friend of half who you were.” Nathan said he stroked my hair as I lay in the bed. “You were too brave.” He said. “you weren’t okay.” He said. “But because of how you acted we didn’t see the pain you were in as much as we should of till later.” Nathan said. “When your mom/ grandma got sick.” He started. “The four of us didn’t know what to do. But your mom was gone so quickly.” Nathan said. “You were 15, so the teenage years. You were 2 years younger than Jess was when she had you both.” He said. I nodded. “We knew if we told you then, when you were in moarning it would hurt you to much. You needed your family. You didn’t need the carpet pulled out underneath you.” He said. I nodded. “we told ourselves we would tell you at 18.” He started. “then you got with.” He started. “he was you trying to cling to something and we tried to understand. We tried to understand Maddie but we couldn’t.” he said to me. “I thought he loved me. he was always there when I needed him. Dad would just want to sit me in front of a equation and watch me or expect to much from me. he didn’t understand I needed to talk.” I started. “Jess had to much on her plate so did you. I didn’t want to worry you both or be a burdern to anyone. He always had time for me. he always would listen. He needed my help. He made me laugh and I felt I was making a difference with him. when I was tutoring him I felt like the first time I was actully helping someone by being smart. Rather than just being.” I stoped I didn’t know what word I was going for “Expected.” Nathan said weakly. “we all only expected the best from you. Someone who didn’t mind you not giving your best. Who let you have fun.” Nathan started. “Chess wasn’t even fun at that point Nathan. With all the compertions I was being put into. It was all just.” I started. “I felt like I was drowning.” I admitted. “I couldn’t get out of it. I was expected to achive so much. i was expected to go college early. Then which college. Then I was expected to be the top of the class.” I started. “we pushed you to hard Maddie I know that.” Nathan said he squeezed my hand. “we didn’t mean to, but we weren’t there for you.” He said. “you were a child that we expected to be an adult because you were so muture. When you wanted to act like a child we all.” He started. “didn’t understand.” he said. “Then Jess got sick.” I started. “I didn’t know what to do. Everytime I went in your room. I would pray that it wouldn’t be the last.” I said. “we expected to much from you.” Nathan said. “I should of got a nanny.” He said. “nathan you would have had constant nannys. The kids needed someone stable. They needed me. I knew they did.” I said. “You were 20.” He said. “you should have been having wild partys in college. Dating having time with friends. Hell touring the world with Becca.” He said. “I wanted to be there for the kids.” I said. “I know Maddie and I never could thankyou enough kiddo.” He said. “because of you, the kids have all got to be kids. They’ve all had the security of knowing if they need someone your there.” he said. “Something you never got.” He said. “I knew you were there.” I said weakly. “I just couldn’t say how I felt.” I told him. I was crying so was he. “the early days that Jess was sick I would go to Addies grave and just sit there until I passed out.” I admitted. “I never knew.” He started. “I didn’t want you too. No one could talk about Addie. It hurt us all. But all I wanted was her.” I said. “Oh Maddie.” Nathan said. “I didn’t know what I wanted.” I said. “sitting on Addies grave got me through a lot.” I said. “when I was 16.” I started. Was I really going to tell him everything. “all I wanted was to swap places with Addie. I knew she would of done a better job here than I was.” I said. “Maddie.” Nathan said tears ran down his face. Seeing him a grown man cry hit my heart and I just couldn’t stop. “I wanted to swap with her so badly.” I said. “I self harmed. It was Ethan who stopped me.” I said truthfully. “what.” He said. “id just lost a chess match and dad was coming down hard on me. it was a rookie mistake and he couldn’t belive how stupid id been. I knew he didn’t mean it harshly he was just.” I started. “to much.” Nathan said stroking my hair. “mom used to soften him, when she was gone.” I tried to explain. “you had a lot of pressure.” Nathan sighed. “I felt like if I was Addie I wouldn’t disappoint anyone anymore.” I said, “Maddie you have never disappointed me and you never could.” He told me. I weakly nodded. “It was stupid I knew I needed help but I was to stubborn to ask for it. So James became a lifeline.” I admitted. “I knew you all hated him and I just wanted to do something to disappoint you all. I wanted to not be expected.” I started. He held me tight trying not to hurt me. “When Jess was gone I felt like all the tears that I had tried not to cry for years were drowning me. but the kids the kids needed me.” I said. “I should of got you help.” Nathan said. “then when dad died, I couldn’t even feel anymore. I just felt numb. Like everything was gone. I was so alone I felt like I was drowning. I didn’t even know how I woke up most days.” I said. “I just funtuctioned. There was two babys and everyone else was falling apart I couldn’t because we were all in pieces.” I said. “Maddie.” He said holding me. “The kids got me through it. They never let me have a second break so I never had a second to think.” I said. “oh sweetheart.” Nathan said. “Then when James was realised. I became scared of every little bump in the night. It was stupid. I didn’t think he would hurt me. but I felt like I was drowning again, I felt like my world was spinning and I just couldn’t get off.” I said. “I still feel like that Nathan. I cant get my head around any of it.” I said. “im meant to be a genius. Im meant to know what I want. But I don’t. I just feel lost.” I said. “Kiddo.” He said. “it always used to hurt me that you didn’t entroduce me to people as your sister in law. You would always just say and this is Maddie. As if they knew who I was. I think most just went with that.” I said weakly. “you couldn’t bring yourself to say the lie could you. Youd always let me say it. You never did.” I said realising. “then when you told girlfirends about me youd always say I was one of your eldest.” I said weakly, I was trying to work something out. “but you would always hesitate on that too.” I said. “I hate calling you my oldest.” Nathan said. “not because I don’t want you baby.” he said squeezing my hand. “but because Addie is older.” He said. “Your always been one of my kids Maddie I told you that so many times.” Nathan said. “but I couldn’t introduce you as my eldest. Your not.” He said. “I need time Nathan.” I said. he didn’t say anything. “I need time to get my head around everything. Ive said things ive been holding back for years that I didn’t even realise was how I felt. I need to work out how I feel and right now im to tired and in to much pain. I feel numb.” I said. “Okay.” Nathan said. “can you go home to the kids. I will ring you when im ready. I just need time to think.” I said. “Okay sweet heart.” He told me. “I love you Madeline never forget that, ive loved you since the moment you were born and I will always love you. You want to disappoint me. but Maddie you never could.” He told me. “I love you.” He told me. “Sorry Nathan I need to sleep.” I said. “i will ring you.” I said, I turned away from him. he didn’t move but I let sleep claim me. when I woke he was gone.
Ethan came after school, he brought chocolate cake and books. “Okay you didn’t need this.” He said with a smile looking at the pile of goodies. “yay books and cake.” I said. he sat down next to me. “if youd of brought me a cup of tea youd of been the best man in the world.” I assured him. he sat next to me. “Don’t they have tea here?” he asked me. “they have icedtea they have sweettea. They even have fruit tea.” I started. “but not a cup of pg tips.” He said. “presisly but its fine I have coffee.” I assured him. He looked like he was worried. “are you okay?” he asked. “im okay Babyboy.” I assured him I squeezed his hand. “Are you all okay?” I asked worried. He nodded. “I should of put the bags.” Ethan started. “hell no. Ethan if he had shot you to get to me. I would never of forgiven myself. He was my mistake and only mine. No one but me and him is resposisble for how things went down. maybe if I just talked to him when he came out. it wouldn’t of got this bad. I am the one who set him off to want to kill me, that and he was sick. He was very sick.” I assured Ethan. Ethan still looked so worried. “gummy worm?” I asked offering the packet. “your going to give yourself diabetes.” Ethan said. “then stop giving me candy.” I said, then I pulled a face. “no don’t give me loads of candy don’t stop.” I said. I got a weak smile on his face. “I know your scared Ethan. Im scared too.” I admitted I took his hand and squeezed it. “im not okay.” I told him. “neither am I.” he admitted. “that gun shot was the scaryest sound ive ever heard.” He admitted. I squeezed his hand. “Hopefully you will never hear that sound again.” I said. he nodded. “Ethan.” I said weakly. “We cant stop everything bad from happening. We are on a world that constantly changes. Everyone has good days but everyone has bad. I think weve had our limit of bad, from here on we should have nothing but good. But don’t hold me to it.” I said. he weakly smiled. “what was on fire?” I asked. “the pool.” He said. “how did they set the pool on fire its full of water.” I said. “that’s what you question, its Greg and Derek and Greg was hurt. Fire calms him.” Ethan said. “my little pior.” I said. “Did he know?” I asked weakly. “he saw Maddie.” Ethan said. I swore. “he was at the door. He hadn’t opened it, but its glass. He saw everything.” Ethan said. I swore again. “he was coming to help you.” Ethan said. “I am so glad he wasn’t out there. tell him he couldn’t of done anything and it would of killed me if I knew he was out there in danger.” I said. Ethan nodded. “he knows but I will reassure him. possibley not using those words.” Ethan said. I squezzed his hand. We shared my pack of gummy words. “How was school?” I asked weakly. “I asked Piper out.” he said. “what did she say?” I asked. “that she cant date.” He said sadly. “Im sorry Bud but belive me from someone whos ex just did what he did. Let it go.” I said. “Avery talked to her.” Ethan said. “what she got involved?” I asked in disbelief. “what happened?” I asked. “Piper asked if we can talk after school.” He said. “what happened?” I asked. “I said I couldn’t today as was visiting my aunt in hospital as her ex boyfriend shot her and I don’t ever want her to think of me as a guy like that. That my family mean a lot to me and that so do my friends and im sorry if I made her feel awkward but I was just trying to be her friend as i like her, that I wasn’t trying to buy her and I never would” Ethan said. “OMG you idiot you should of talked to her rather than come me, and give her that truth bomb. But I am so proud of you telling her how you feel.” I said. “I am so proud of you Ethan. Im sorry I put to much pressure on you.” I admitted. “Its fine 6 kids v 1 adult is to big an odds.” He said. “espically when fires involved.” He said with a smile. “Your not trying to look after everyone.” I started. “hell no I read my book and left dad to it, then had a kick around with a ball. It wasn’t bad.” He assured me. “it just makes me know one thing.” He said. “whats that?” I asked. “I want kids. But not till im much older and not like us.” Ethan said. I laughed. “your older than me.” I told him. “I don’t think so. I helped with the fire.” He said. “I thought you would.” I admitted laughing. “Maddie.” He said worried. “yeah Ethan?” I asked. “Will you be okay?” he asked. “im healing im having another blood transfusion.” I assured him. “I will be fine.” I assured him. “I meant mentally. Your not going to.” He started. “its going to take me a lot to get over it. I might be a bit jumpy and scared for a while. I might never be able to trust anyone again.” I admitted how I felt. “but im strong and I know that its okay that I don’t feel okay. But im also going to talk to someone about how I feel. I think I should of years ago.” I admitted. He looked confused. “don’t worry about it, but know that if you ever need to talk. I am always here so is your dad. But we can also get you someone unrelated to talk to.” I told him. “know we don’t expect you to achive anything but we are proud of everything you do. Even just being you.” I assured him. “Be who you want to be. Screw expentations.” I said. I think I was telling myself for the first time. I loved math I still did and it really was what I wanted to do. But it was okay to fail. “its okay to fail. Its okay to fall down.” I said remembering what Jessica said in her dvd on the day she died. “but getting back up is the hard part and if you can do that you really can do anything.” I said. “it may take a while, but we can get back up.” I said. he squeezed my hand. I smiled at him. “Are you going to go watch him get sentenced?” he asked me. “I have to go give evidence.” I admitted with the cop came and said early. “hes going to jail though, he shot a cop.” I said. “he shot you too.” He said. I nodded. “He shot me. never ever have a gun.” I told him. Nathan was anti gun the whole family was. “ofcourse I will never have a gun.” He assured me. A weird thought crossed my mind. This wasn’t my nephew. He never had been my nephew. This was my baby brother. I held my arms open and he so gently hugged me, Ethan would and always had been my family. But with this hug I didn’t feel as alone as I had felt for years.
I was going to go stir crazy. How long could I be expected to stay still. It was Friday and I was still in hospital. The doctor said I wasn’t ready to go home. Youd think they would be in a rush. Although saying that my tablets did make me sleepy. I looked at the ballons from the kids the other day. No flowers, to be honest I think it would take me a while to like flowers again. Becca had gone back to Milan even though she wanted to stay another week, her boyfriend had to go back to work and she had to get a draft to her publisher. I would miss her but she could come back when ever she wanted it wasn’t like she had a job that tied her to Milan just a apartment. Maria came most days after college for an hour bringing food that I would eat. Rosie came, Nathan came when I said he could. But we hadn’t addressed it. It was the elephant in the room. but we both ignored it. `I had a shower today though which was good, well I sat in the shower and had a wash. I was in clothes that Maria had brought my and had brushed my hair even if my one handed ponytail wasn’t the neatest I didn’t feel as ick as I had for a few days. “Madeline?” Someone asked I looked up and there was Dominic. Had he come to visit me? “Hey?” I said as a question. Alright I had enjoyed working for him but he hardly said more than a few words to me whilst I had. Although I was meant to be going back to his office next week it wouldn’t be happening now. “How are you?” he asked me. “Bored.” I admitted. He put a folder down on my bedside table. Hey it might be work but it would keep me busy. I smiled. “Thanks.” I said and I meant that. “No problem just check it over if you see any areas ring the number and tell them.” He told me. “thankyou.” I said truthfully. “Would you like to sit.” I said as he awkwardly stood. “Yeah.” He said and he sat. “So.” He said awkard. I watched him not sure what to say or think. Why was he here? “Are you okay?” he asked me I know he wanted more than just bored. He like Nathan wanted to know how I really felt currently. I couldn’t say to them though. But I had managed to say to a doctor and he had prescribed me anti depressents and anxity medication as I had a small panic attack when I saw flowers which was redicious they weren’t even for me. “im not.” I admitted after a long pause. “but that’s okay I will get there.” I said. he nodded he looked worried. “Hes in jail now he wont ever hurt you again.” He said. “until he gets out.” I said weakly. He hadn’t got a response for that. “Nathan has one of the best lawyers helping.” He told me. I nodded. I didn’t need a lawyer I was the victim that much had been explained by the lawyer this week. But he was going to make sure James could never hurt anyone again. I had to tell a lot of things id never said about. Like how old I was when we had sex for the first time. how old he was. It was all to much. “So the work?” I asked. “only if you feel up to it. I know its something you enjoy.” He said. I weakly smiled. “Thankyou.” I said and I meant it. He wasn’t going to push any subject I realised. “Did Nathan ask you to come?” I asked weakly. “no but he knows I have.” Dominic told me. I nodded. “Maddie.” He said looking at me. “Nathans trying to be there, he would be here rather than at work if he could be.” He told me. “I know.” I assured him. hell Nathan was here to much, “I sent him back to work. He was driving me nuts. One of us bored is enough. Hes also got to pay more attention to fire safety.” I said with a smile. “I wont be coming work next week.” I said weakly. “I don’t know my building is fully wheelchair assisible.” He told me with a smile. I had to smile at him. “I hopefully will be walking soon.” I said. “a few weeks, mind if I look at the notes?” he said. “be my guest.” I said shrugging. “there aint much in there.” I said shrugging. He opened them, I realised then that my anxity and antidepresent medication was now listed as the doctor had wrote it down this morning but it was okay he already knew I wasn’t coping. I just hadn’t told Nathan yet. I think id needed help years ago when Mom died, maybe even before when I lost Addie. He read my notes quietly, he didn’t comment if hed read about the medication except. “Do you feel sleepy?” I nodded. “all the time currently.” I admitted. He said about eating a bit healthyer to get iron into me rather than the medication might help. He said it looking at my pile of candy and cookies and cakes. “Your welcome to some.” I said holding out a packet of twinkies. “I will say no to the twinkie but is that redvines.” He said. I lifted up the redvines and held the packet open to him. “Thankyou.” He said. “your welcome.” I said. “you not got a laptop or tablet?” he asked me. “I got one its on charge over there.” I said pointing at my tablet charging. He looked and smiled. “so what have you been doing in here to keep yourself occupied?” he asked me. “watching Agents of shield. Reading. Playing chess against Ethan.” I said pointing at the chess board. “3d chess?” he asked. “please tell me you’ve played, if you havent you’ve lost all the nerd credit ive given you.” I said. “You’ve given me nerd credit?” he asked confused. “don’t get ahead of yourself it was Derek who gave you most of it.” I said. “is nerd credit a good thing?” he asked me. “you’ve met the kids right?” I asked with a smile. “I still need explaining how and why they set a fire in the swimming pool.” He said. “Don’t worry so am i. but I gave up asking reasons years ago.” I said. “So you just go with it?” he asked me. “They are interesting kids.” I said. “Your scared of snakes?” he asked. “yeah and spiders. Both they’ve brought home and set loose.” I said. “I think there experement is how far they can push me before I snap.” I admitted. “Interesting expereiment.” He said. “ive snapped a few times.” I admitted. “this a vaction then.” He said calmly. “this is boring.” I said. he brought the 3d chess board over and set it up. we started playing the game. I wasn’t scared of Dominic, I think that’s what I liked I wasn’t nervous off him or scared. I knew he wasn’t interested in me, except the few times I caught him looking at my boobs whilst I sat on the bed. I won the chess game. We played again. We actully talked about agents of shield I won the second game. He set up again. I let him win the 3rd he told me not to. I beat him another 3 times. “remind me never to play chess with you again.” He said. “My.” I started to say dad taught me but I remembered then that my dad wasn’t my dad. I saw the look he gave me. “you knew?” I asked. “knew what?” he asked me. “that Nathan was my dad?” I asked. “For a smart girl the only thing I don’t understand is how you didn’t.” he said. I admit I glared at him. “im not that smart.” I said. “obviously.” He said. I had to smile, which was redicious hed just called me dumb. “I best go, I shall see you at the office when your better. I will swap interns for the few months. Theres a few on the waiting list.” He said. “Thankyou.” I said. “Don’t get shot again to get out of work, it only works once.” He said. “okay I will keep that in mind.” I said and I smiled. He left. That was so unreal it was unbelievable. I laid down and went to sleep almost instantly, I had been getting sleepier every moment that had past. Had he seen that? You know what I didn’t understand the guy and possibly never would. Why did I even want to.