Chapter 07 | Livelihood
I spent the rest of the day with thoughts racing through my head. While I knew that a girl like me probably could never settle down, let alone with a man as accomplished and… good as Alex, I still liked to fantasize about it. The idea that it could ever happen has been driving me insane with anticipation.
We were finally standing in front of my apartment, which was a big deal for someone like me. Working in a profession that would mark me as one of the most likely to be in danger, I always took precautions with my clients. We always met at a decided location far from where I lived. I never let anyone track my whereabouts. I only realized what I was doing after I had given him an address to put into his gps. I didn’t even object when he offered to walk me to my door.
“So,” he cleared his throat and I couldn’t help but smile as I saw him discreetly wipe his palms on his pants, “have you thought about what I said?”
“I still don’t know,” I admitted quietly, looking anywhere but at his eyes.
“You don’t know what to do or you don’t know how you feel?” I could tell he was growing confident with what he felt for me, but the truth was, I thought this kind of thing only happened in movies like Pretty Woman. I didn’t fit in a world where love just magically falls into my lap. It’s not realistic enough for me.
“Well,” he sighed lightly and rested a hand at the side of my face, his thumb running back and forth gently against my cheek, “how does this make you feel?”
I had trouble inhaling smoothly as he continued. Just as I managed to meet his eyes, he leaned down and pressed his lips against mine. It was a chaste kiss, but there was something about the way he lingered that made my mind race.
“How about that?” he asked as he pulled away to stare at me with hope.
Despite the million reasons for me to go inside and shut the door on him, I had a smile on my face, and a pair of hands tugging on his shirt. We kissed and kissed, pulling away for only partial seconds for the sake of air intake. My limbs had a mind of their own as moments later, he had me in his arms while we made our way to my bedroom.
Nothing made sense, and nothing had to. Alex was a wonderful man and I felt myself giving into his quiet charm, which always hit me in large waves of attraction. I was lost in him and I liked it.
I pulled off my clothes and he pulled off his. There was an odd moment of shyness as we stood at the side of my bed, our bodies pressed firmly against each other, but we remained vertical.
We were grinding, and I felt his throbbing hardness rubbing against my front, where my clit was equally aroused. The skin on skin was sensual, and I wondered if anyone had ever made me feel this… cherished.
He held me firmly, but within the firmness, there was a gentle touch, like he was being careful not to hurt me while his inner animal showed its wanton needs. He wanted to do everything to me, but he wanted me to want it too.
With that thought, I pulled him down with me onto my bed, and we spent the night as man and woman. For the first time ever, I slept with a client without the intention on charging, because Alex wasn’t really a client. He’ll always be more.
I woke up in his arms, and I had a moment of panic before melting into safe comfort. I rarely stayed the night, and even when I did, I never slept. I don’t sleep with clients, but rather I stay awake and have sex when asked. I pursed my lips as I tried my best to push thoughts of my profession out of my head.
Still I had to admit my discomfort in my decision to be with him last night.
“What are you thinking of?” I heard him say.
“Nothing,” I lied.
“Come on, Valerie. What is it?”
“I won’t stop what I do for you,” I stated plainly, but I feared what he might say.
“I know. I don’t expect you to.” His response made me sigh in relief. “Wow, you’re a business major,” he said staring at my framed college degree on the wall.
“Yeah,” I rolled my eyes. I hate that thing, even if I’m also proud of it.
“Well, I thought that it would be a good path to take, but once I graduated, the job market was in terrible shape.”
“Wait,” he lifted himself up on his elbow. “Is that why you stayed with this profession?”
“It’s not the only reason, but I guess I would say it’s the main one.” I sat up and stretched out my arms. I felt his eyes on my bare back and as I turned to look at him, I noticed a thoughtful look on his face. Seemingly distracted, he was surprised when he felt my hand wrap around his member, teasingly tugging at it. “Join me in the shower?”
Alex nodded excitedly and I laughed.
The next few weeks worked out so well, I was amazed I hadn’t tried this before. I went out on dates with Alex on nights I didn’t have a client and when I was busy with work, he would always be on my mind. Sex wasn’t quite the same to me anymore, and every time I was with him, I was reminded that it could be so much better when emotions were involved.
Still, I was making money at the same rate as before, and after two months of dating, I started to wonder if Alex had a jealous bone in him.
“What if you could put that business degree to use?” Alex asked me one day as we had lunch in his office. We had done plenty of sinful things before the food arrived so we were both starving by the time there was a knock on the door.
“What do you mean?” I was busy trying to work the chopsticks in my hand.
“I mean, I think there’s an opening that’s perfect for you in marketing.”
I looked up at him and realized he was being completely serious.
“Would you think about it?” I could tell he was trying to stay in his lane, but this gentle nudge was enough for me to nod.
“I’ll give it a try, but I’m not losing my clients.”
He nodded in agreement, but I knew there was a glint of sadness in his eyes when he heard my words.
My heart pinched just for a second, but I kept my expression straight. I had to look out for myself. My list of clients were my livelihood and no amount of affection can take that away from me.