Who We Are: College

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We are

Edd breathed heavily as he stared at the doors that lead into the gymnasium. It wasn’t too ornate, just enough. Still... he was nervous. It had been hectic years.

It was cold, winter was rolling up with speed, but final exams were long gone and the school was now busy with its other activities. Edd had always watched and felt curious how many people moved through campus even when classes were gone. It was never empty. Today, he could appreciate it even more... and necessary.

Thanksgiving break wasn’t too long ago, yet... it felt such a distant memory. At least some things. He couldn’t help but yelp as a firm hand was placed on his back. The giggles and chuckles behind him were very familiar by now, along with other figures that simply made him smile... and the tears harder to hold back.

His parents were first, hugging him and praising him for this day, proud as they could be. His parents weren’t that neither present nor emotional to start, so... their sole presence and the smiles on their faces were more than enough for Edd as he had his tears wiped by his mother, despite being the same height. Their talk was rather brief as his father motioned to his hand to the group behind them... one many years old from when it started. They’d go and get seats as Edd waved them farewell and turned back to his beloved friends.

Nazz: You look amazing!
May: Is that make-up?

Edd chuckled as he was surrounded by the girls and Nazz wrapped her arms around his neck and completely nuzzled him. He was used to this behavior by now and him becoming part of the “gals”. It was a… stereotype do to his “label”… one he was guilty of enjoying. It was… liberating. As odd as it sounded and as much as others fought against. To him, labels and what others thought had nothing to do with it. He felt comfortable around them (the girls) and the more he spent with them, the more open and free he felt about his sexuality over the last month. He found himself drifting and enjoying the gossip, the feminine talks about boyfriends and future plans and all their casual talk.

It was his guilty vice.

Edd: I had a pimple.

Edd replied in a soft and ashamed voice.
Eddy, Lyon and Marie: Dude

Edd had no time to retort back as his waist was embraced by strong muscular arms that squished him with immense strength. Edd knew very well who’s bear hug was this as he squirmed and begged to be brought down.

Ed: Congratulations Double D!
May: Honey, you are hurting him.

Ed would immediately place a panting Double D down, who’d feel his knees buckle and he’d slouch on the concrete for a while. Ed would be reprimanded by Eddy, who’d be reprimanded by a motherly May. Such was their usual behavior and Edd could only smile as he saw things truly never changed. At least not so much. However, another strong grab from his collar would yank him up and a sturdy built ginger woman would dust his attire off. Edd greeted her with affection.

Lee: Easy there pretty boy. And… woah, truly pretty, you place make up better than me.
Edd: Just some base and a little eyeliner Lee.
Marie: Compared to Lee, anyone does a better job at makeup.
Lee: Say that again. I dare you, sis.

As the Kanker sisters got into their usual bickering it was now the boys who greeted Edd and congratulated him on this important day. Everyone looked truly fantastic; elegant yet casual.

Lee wore a female business suit, probably one she used for work, while her sisters each wore attires that complemented their figures the best. May looked elegant and womanly with an elegant white blouse and black tube skirt, while Marie took a more chic and sharp edge with a black business suit and top, but a black skirt for her legs. Nazz was a bit simpler, wearing a blue dress that complemented her figure. As for the boys, casual yet elegant suits were their choice as they all began talking to Edd about this day and what his plans for the future stood- teasing him a bit on whether he’d choose to be a stay at home mom.

As laughter rose from the group, Edd let out a squeal as he was lifted up into the air with care and ease. He knew who it was, who’d grab him with such care yet strength. After all… he was late.

Eddy: Get a room would yah?

Nazz would elbow Eddy on the ribs as Kevin dropped Edd back on the ground as began to bicker with Eddy in their usual way. Things truly just never changed… except the fact that Kevin kept an arm around his waist. That was a pleasant change.

They had become more comfortable together. To Edd, it was these moments that made his red headed, emotional and impulsive boyfriend the best one in the world. Even if he was late.

Edd: You… are late.
Kevin: Geez! Can anyone cut me some slack! I know!
Marie: Your boy never forgets.
Lee: Keep that in mind if you ever get him mad.
Eddy: Or if you use the wrong words.
Nazz: Hey! I’m not a bitch girlfriend.
Eddy: See, I never said that.

Nazz socks Eddy’s elbow as the group laughs but they soon make up with a kiss. As for the boy couple that stood as the center of attention, Kevin simply wrapped his arms around his neck, with utmost affection. They weren’t news by now, and the group had made their own scandal weeks before. This was what now normal to everyone. It felt great.

Kevin: Sorry, I was just trying to look my best on your day.
Edd: You certainly make my emotions difficult to convey with those sweet words.

Edd would turn around and kiss him briefly and quickly on the lips as a teasing hoot rose from the other.

Kevin: Oh shut up you noisy shits!
Edd: Kevin!

As Edd slapped his beloved’s chest everyone laughed and Edd stood beside the ginger boy, hugging his arm.

Edd: Be on time, next time.
Kevin: Next time?
Edd: Your graduation.
Kevin: Whenever it happens.
Edd: Melodramatic

The boys talked in whispers as the group roared with chatter, their smiles and giggles left in a personal exchange. The topic however was a bit grim, one that both of them had just recently overcome. Despite the glee and emotions of today, the last months hadn’t been a breeze.

As Edd’s schedule grew ever busier and he felt ever more comfortable in his own skin, a sense of foreboding constantly swept him. Time would tell it was simply his mind being cruel on his self, but it also allowed him to be present for his couple’s needs. While Edd met many of his goals and dreams, Kevin seemed to drift further into obscurity. Yet, neither made each other feel guilty nor responsible… they sought each other, for company and support. Kevin motivated and gave Edd strength to keep moving forward, to pursue his dream. Edd stayed by Kevin’s side, to comfort and support. Kevin was an emotional wreck, suffering from depression and many times just being tormented by his thoughts.

He had been abandoned by his family. Shunned and insulted for something he could not control. Such statement was a reality Edd’s own research seemed to dauntingly point out. Behavior could be mathematically explained and predicted. Your thoughts, your actions and even your emotions (sexual included). Yet… it couldn’t be controlled. Regardless of variables or “stimuli” placed that could alter behavior… the change of one’s nature was not possible. To Edd this meant a commitment, to stand beside him… to be his strength.

Kevin’s turmoil was enough to prevent him from graduating with the rest, but he was able to keep pushing and to fight his inner demons. Failing only one class, he would have a pretty relaxed final semester before graduation. Edd was proud of this stubborn, emotional and impulsive boy he loved. He had grown, he was accepting himself… he was living as he wanted to. At long last.

Kevin: Wish I was here with you.

Kevin whispered into Edd’s ears. The boy smiled as he straightened his graduation cap over his beanie.

Edd: You are here, silly.
Kevin: You know what I mean…
Edd: I know… it’s been a rough pair of months.
Kevin: Yeah…
Edd: But at least they have also been fun. We have done more things.

As he kissed the other’s cheek, they both chuckled as the speakers rang the final call before the ceremony began. Everyone bid Edd farewell as they moved into the gymnasium to get their seats. Edd could only smile as he watched everyone, even his ginger partner rush in. It was time.

The ceremony came to a close quickly. Euphoria, adrenaline, excitement, nervousness, regardless of the reason that caused the sensation of time to simply pass by with speed, Edd could barely believe this chapter of his life was over. It felt like a memory. However, he had little time to dwell and conjure up the past as his group of friend hugged him dearly and congratulated him again. His “list of achievements” won him even a personal congratulation and distinction from the dean, making him feel very embarrassed. Now, it was time to celebrate.

His parents had decided to join the “young adults” in their gathering and it was… rather refreshing for everyone to feel they were treated as equals. Lyon and Marie (ever prepared) had contacted “La Famiglia” and its vivid family to prepare the place for their Arrival. Ruso nearly crushed Edd with a mighty hug as the rest of the family members praised and welcomed him as one of their own. Edd knew that different cultures had noticeable distinctions and differences between one another… but he still found it incredible how these individuals could be so open, loud and energetic. Food, wine, beer and more food moved about the place and the terrace as everyone spread out and celebrated. The “real adults” quickly got entangled in their own talks as the more youthful cousins, sons and daughters (rest of the family really) got together with the group of friends to join in on the party.

Edd remembered the last time he was in such a gathering… more than a year ago. Time flies. Now, it was just that… a memory, a happy one and one that had allowed him to come this far. Kevin once again had opted to be with the younger kids, playing with them as Lyon and Marie were rather inseparable as they talk with other more of their age. Nazz and May were truly motherly, while Lee and Eddy simply fell to the vice of alcohol. Their friendship was rooted deeper than anything in the world. Like a family itself.

Kevin: Hey Double D, what ya thinkin’.

Edd chuckled as Kevin carried a small golden haired and blue eyed beautiful girl on his back. She was giggling, and it was contagious. The small angel was simply adorable.

Edd: Nothing, just how wonderful this moment is.

Kevin: Don’t you ever stop thinkin?

Edd: I couldn’t even if i…

Edd felt the words leave him as their lips met. His mind quickly going blank. A small giggle and the leaving sensation of the warmth and firmness leaving his lips made him come back to his senses and Kevin got the girl off his back as the girl began making faces at them.

Kevin: What’s wrong Isabela?

Edd: I believe she is still in the age where cooties exist.

The girl giggles as Edd tickles her and she makes faces to express she had indeed found the kissing weird. The boys laugh as Kevin picked the girl up and kissed her cheek, the girl quickly wiping it off on her sleeve. The rest of the gang soon gathered, teasing Kevin on the “surprising fact” he didn’t hate children. Edd wasn’t free of teasing either, the topics of family where quickly pushed on him as the evident display of “fatherly Kevin” was at its finest. There was no escaping it, and so… they managed. Perhaps it was the fact that there were small kids around, but Kevin kept his vocabulary clean and simply answered back at the group with more teases. Edd’s heart pounded as he hugged his ginger’s arm. Today was perfect… just as before and as the days to come.

Kevin: Ugh, the kids really tired me.

Edd: I’m surprised you can keep up with them.

Kevin had flopped on the wooden bench beside him on the terrace, noticeably tired from playing so much with the children. Edd couldn’t help but give him a kiss on the cheek as he edged closer.

The party had slowly dwindled as most members got drunk, other got tired and other (perhaps the most responsible) simply excused themselves as they had other plans or duties to tend to. Only a couple were left as the sun began to sink ever slowly into the horizon, coloring the sky with shades of blues, reds and orange tints. It was always beautiful to watch.

Kevin: So… what now?

Edd looked up, confused, at the Ginger who smoothly wrapped an arm around his shoulder. He chuckled.

Edd: Well… I’ve got my projects still at the campus. Almost sure they’ll make me an offer.

Kevin: Yeah, but you got other options.

Edd eyed with mischief and relief. Though the topic was sensitive, at least Kevin was openly asking him about it… like a couple. He would usually bottle the topics up until it was too late, he exploded or he did something rash and impulsive. He wasn’t thinking of him… he was thinking of them, and it warmed Edd’s heart.

Edd: Yeah, I do… but none of them is truly worth it.

Kevin: Really? You could ask almost for anything! Even make a lot of money.

Edd: You know money has never been in my interests, though we do need it to make a living.

Kevin: Ugh, you can’t truly believe that science is everything.

Edd: No, I’m just thinking that we need to state priorities.

Kevin: Yeah, yours are actually worrying me.

Edd: How come? I’m thinking of what is best for us.

Kevin: And I’m thinking what is best for you.

Edd: Thank you. That’s very kind but… Kevin… why aren’t you thinking of you too? There is no “me”. There is…

Edd leans on the ginger’s shoulders, nuzzling it a bit. He felt warm, his skin felt warm. He never quite understood how he could be so warm, contrary to him. Although, when it came to personalities, they were opposites once again. He was most definitely the emotional one.

Edd: Only “we”.

Kevin smiled as he felt his cheeks burn. He was blushing, he knew it, but he had become used to it. This frail, slim, brilliant and shy boy had made him face his own fears, his own mind and himself.

Kevin: I hate you.

Edd: No you don’t.

Kevin lifts his beloved’s chin just for a moment as he places a warm and loving kiss. They had become more common and warmer over the last weeks. Edd felt how his lips were slowly pried open by his tongue, making the kiss and affection much more sensual and intimate. The night shone bright and, a top the rooftop garden with all the lights out… the stars were beautifully visible.

Kevin: What now then?

Edd: Nobody knows. Life is full of mysteries.

Kevin: Thought you wanted to understand everything.

They chuckle.

Edd: If I manage to understand you…that would be enough.

Kevin hugged him close, he truly did love him.

Kevin: Hey… Double D.

Edd: Yeah?

Kevin: I love you.

Edd smiled as he hides his face, sinking it on the elegant shirt Kevin had decided to wear tonight.

Edd: Me too.

Kevin smiled as his heart beat with strength. His hand slowly found a gap around the rim of the beanie Eddward always wore, moving his hand to caress and rub his soft hair underneath. Edd moans as it felt good. It always felt good.

Kevin: Hey Double D.

Edd: Yeah?

Kevin: Will you always love me?

Edd: Always.

Kevin: Regardless of everything?

Edd: Why these morbid questions?

Kevin: They aren’t morbid. I just… want to make sure.

Edd: What is it that unsettles you?

Kevin: I… well… I’d really like it if…

A long silence lingers. Edd felt slowly how the warmth of Kevin’s chest paired with the beautiful sparkle of the starry knight seemed to be a work of Morpheus. A slow chant into slumber. His eyes were blurry, his body felt light yet heavy, his mind was slowly becoming foggy. Edd wasn’t able to make the last of Kevin’s words.

Kevin sighed as he patted his beloved’s head. His heart ached, yet… perhaps it just wasn’t the right time. They’d have to talk about it some other time. But… how much time was left? The letter in his jacket fixed a definitive date… such was the military.

But… perhaps…more pain stacking so… was what he was placing on the bench beside his lap. He loved the man resting on his chest, especially his rather feminine, slender and delicate face. The face he loved to see every morning and every night. He had even used that exact phrasing for his vows. He felt kinda stupid for even thinking over something that big. The small box beside his lap, however, said otherwise. All of his saving had gone into that small diamond ring. Neither fanciful nor humble… it was his all. It was a promise. To come back… and to finish what he started.

Kevin: There is only “us”, huh?

Kevin smiled as he looked up at the night sky. He felt like he could do anything. He would always be here… his rock… his heart… his world. He… now… had a home… a family. Or, at least they would try to make one. He felt eager to do it. But… it was best to talk of such topic some other time. It was time to go home. Their home.

Edd gasped as his legs were lifted by the strong arms of his mate. He couldn’t help but squeal, moan and gasp as his insides burned. It wasn’t his first time anymore, he still remembered that distant memory. He had been so girlish and prude… so innocent and pure. Well, there was none of that now as Kevin’s manhood went in him with slight ease.

Edd wanted it to be special, he wanted him to enjoy this moment, and he wanted to enjoy it too. It would be their last time together for a while.

Always finding the perfect timing, Kevin had explained the situation to him this morning… a week before deployment. Edd hated how the world could still create wars for idiotic reasons… and yet… his formulas all aimed to the same conclusion. It was all inevitable.

Edd had thought about this before… when he had used the formulae on those he knew. It was unethical… but… he longed for data. Data was cold and definitive.

“True horror is perhaps learning that chaos is natural. Causal and incidental of nature, it’s part of it.”

It is natural for there to be wars, it is natural for Kevin to have chosen to go into one. Everything… was natural. Everything was numbers and data… and his formulae were causing a ruckus do to it.

Edd felt the tears stream down his cheeks as is back arched in pleasure, the gushing sensation of a thick liquid filling his insides as his own escaped his rod (smaller than his companion’s). The tears weren’t of pain, nor happiness…he was truly sad. He shivered in the physical lingering sensation of pleasure, yet his heart throbbed in pain. However, he couldn’t help but giggle as his considerate other carefully and teasingly wiped his body clean from… his own fluids. Edd clung to him lovingly.

Kevin: What is it?

Edd: You are too unfair.

Kevin: I’m… sorry.

His sculpted body was beautiful, and Edd couldn’t avoid but kiss his pecs, his collar and his neck. He wished he wouldn’t leave. But… it was inevitable. Their time together was limited, and they wished to make the best of it.

Kevin: Hey…at least I do have good news.

Edd: What?

Edd’s voice was a whisper as he stayed close to him. Kevin, a bit restricted in movement, managed to stretch his arm to the nightstand and open the top drawer.

Kevin: I… was hoping to make it a bit more… special. But…

Edd: Make what special?

Kevin: Well…

Kevin showed the small box to Edd who was quick in connecting the dots. Such boxes were specific to a single purpose and message. Did he?

Edd: K-Kevin?!

Kevin: You said you’d always love me…

Edd: I did… I mean… I do! Kevin...

Kevin: I… would really…

Kevin opened the small box, revealing the silver ring with a small diamond on top. Edd giggled as he knew he must’ve had Nazz help him select this gift. Nazz was the most humble and simple girl out of the lot. He loved it.

Edd: Yes…

Kevin: Really?

Edd: Yes! Of course I would, Kevin…

Edd wrapped his arms around his neck as he pulled him in for a kiss. Kevin was out of words. His heart felt like it was jumping with joy. They laughed.

Edd: Promise you’ll come back.

Kevin: I swear. I’ll come back safe and sound.

Edd: You better…we have a family to start.

Kevin: Just you and me.

Edd: Always.

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