Rainie had no idea what time they…Well… Actually she had no idea what time and how long she had finally fallen asleep. However when she surfaced from the dark pit of sleep, she saw that the room was bathed with the wraithlike lavender of dawn, though, she saw a glimpse of ray of morning sun streamed in between the heavy drapes.
She sighed in pleasure and felt the silk sheet was wonderful against her skin. Soon, immediately she felt something was missing. Stirring her head she found the big bed was empty. Counting from one to ten, she forced herself into the consciousness.
For a moment, a foreign feeling invaded her well-being. She wondered whether she had dreamed the night before, but the imprint of Draven’s head that had shared a pillow with her and her naked body were the proof that they had indeed spent the intimacy together.
And she felt oh…So wonderfully and luxuriously overwhelmed after the night in his arms.
The only missing, she belatedly noticed, glancing around the room was Draven, himself. He was not there and she was alone. Her heart beat irregularly at the thought of being left alone, raising her from the last remnants of sleep.
Where was he? She puzzled, stretching nimbly.
Pressing a hand to secure the covers to her chest, Rainie then inched to edge of the bed soundlessly. Swinging her bare legs from the bed, she tiptoed over the carpeted floor.
Her eyes felt and saw her clothes chaotically scattered all over. She needed time to gather all when suddenly her eyes caught another thing beneath the garments.
If a while ago she had been in doubt pertaining about them being together last night, now she was ultimately forced to see a very strong evidence that could tell otherwise of her doubts.
She blinked couple of time, trying to focus, work out, while silently she counted. One…Two…Three…Four…
A tingle went through her as she recounted.
Geez…She thought her sluggish eyes deceived her and shut down her brain for not functionally working even just to count a simple numbers.
But, she still had splendid eyes sights and apparently her brain was not really completely, irrevocably damaged.
There were really four.
They really had used four condoms in one night!
Okay, she did not know who was really a wanton in between two of them now. If she was, well…Draven Knight really knew how to bring the wild side of her.
After all this time intimacy for her was good. That was it. Just good, nothing more, nothing less. But with Draven…
It was amazing!
He even could have made her forget how and when he had put on the rubbers.
Well, of course she had not asked him either, since she had been busy with her own libidos…
“Good morning…” Suddenly a heavy seductive voice startled her.
A gasp of surprise escaped her lips and she turned to the source of the sound. Rainie was so engrossed in her boggling mind, that she wasn’t aware of his reappearance. But…Her surprise couldn’t hold at the sight of him standing at the threshold in the door way with his hands on either side of his lean hips.
He haf shaved, though his tousled dark hair was still muss from sleep and his smoldering eyes hooded. Seeing him dressing in nothing but a silk black robe made him look-like a wild, sinewy panther, she judged immersed. Anything half as dangerous as he looked right now should have come with a warning label.
Rainie gulped essentially, watching the overwhelmingly male anatomy exposed. “Where were you?” She asked, concealing her awe towards him.
“I got a phone call from Nathan. The calling was so annoying just like him, so eventually I had to answer it.” He stated languidly. “And why did you wake up so early?”
“I found the bed was empty.”
Uh oh…It was a great way to confirm herself as an idiot, she marveled, figuratively smacking her head. Her ability to form words was washed away by a tide of lust and apparently way too far of being sophisticated, demanding Draven to be with her on the bed considering everything she had said last night, pertaining her statement that she had not wanted to be someone’s belonging and she had not wanted anyone as her possession also.
He raised his dark, expressive eyebrow and Rainie’s breathing hitched in her throat. She wondered how many women especially at her stage like this he would concord with that seemingly insignificant move. “Hmmm…You miss me?” He asked. “I didn’t expect you wake up this early.”
“Neither did I.” She stated, helpless to be watched by those eagle eyes.
“How are you this morning?” He asked, moving fluidly across the room while a possessive smile curved on the mouth that had pleasured her last night.
“I’m good.” She replied, nervously playing with the cover that suddenly slit down barely cover her top. When she pulled it back up, she noticed the way his gaze had shifted, his cheeks darkening and his jaw clenched.
As he came towards her, it was not so much that she stood her ground as that her feet that had become welded to the floor. Rainie went still and her mind totally went blank witnessing the way he was looking at her. And the look he bestowed upon her was of the greatest she had ever won.
“Just good?” He huskily asked, once he was standing in front of her. He searched her face while she wondered what he hoped to see. Then he leaned over to haul one of his arms to her side. “Hello sexy.”
“Hi…” She said, bracing her hand against the hot skin of the naked part of his chest.
“Hmm… glad to see you like this, standing waiting for me, though I prefer to find out if you’re still sleeping.” His gaze flicked to her mouth, scorching her with its intensity.
“Why?” Her voice was a little more than a whisper.
He didn’t answer immediately. Instead he lifted the other one of his hand and caught a silken strand between his fingers. He then tucked a wayward of her hair behind her ear dragging out the moment that seemed befitted what felt like a historic occasion.
“Because I like kissing you while you were sleeping.” He stated, his thumb already had moved that lazy, rhythmic way, stealing her breath.
“Oh…” She felt a giddy. “You don’t, uhmmm, you don’t like kissing me when I’m fully awake?”
“I didn’t say that.” His glittering eyes seized hers. “I’d prefer to kiss you while you were sleeping is because I like to surprise you.” He said kissing the nape of her neck. “Like this.” He added and trailed down the teasing of his kisses to her shoulder blade. “And this…” He continued without stopping. “And this one…”
Oh! Flame shot through her body. Rainie was shivery, giddy, first warm, then cold as his mouth marked out butterfly kisses, pushing down the white cover very gently.
“Have I told you that you look beautiful when you just have woken up?” He whispered, dipping his head to nuzzle her neck for more. “I love to see you like this. Do you like it when kiss you like this, my sleeping beauty?”
Okay she did not know whether she supposed to answer his question or not, because clearly her mind went totally blank. However when Draven stopped his nuzzling and looked into her eyes with his wicked gleam of bottomless eyes, some part of her that had survived the inferno managed to register that he was actually waiting for the answer. “Well, I haven’t been woken up like this before.” She admitted. “But so far I don’t have any complain.”
He raised that dark, expressive eyebrow and Rainie’s breathing hitched in her throat. She wondered just how many women he had won over with that seemingly insignificant move.
Well clearly, she was smitten. Totally.
“I’m glad to be the first person to that to you.” He said. “Believe me, I’ve lots of things I can show you. And I can’t wait anymore. I want to spend more time with you. I want do things with you.”
“Really?” Her voice was low and soft, her eyes were languorous.
“Of course.” He said then paused. His gaze didn’t alter. “Don’t tell me that you don’t believe me what I said.”
“I…Well…” She stammered. Well, when he looked at her that way, how could she say no? “I…” She cleared her throat. “I do believe you…”
Draven did not budge. “Rainie…” He called her name sweetly, settling her down onto the bed with him. “Tell me the truth.” He commanded softly.
He slid his hand beneath her hair, curling his palm around her neck. “I know you don’t want to believe me.” He stated. “And I also know you became like this because of your past relationship. Honestly, I don’t blame you. I’m not going to ask you to completely believe me. I’m not. Because I think you’re doing a right thing to do for not trusting man. I’m a man. I know who I am, what man, our species do, and the reason why man is created by God. I’m not perfect Rain. I don’t need a conscience to remind me. I’ve got my own and seriously it’s already screwing me upside down for all the sins I’ve made. But one thing I keep truthful is my feeling.”
“Draven…” Rainie coached.
“Shh…Please hear me out.” He said, lifting another hand and placed a finger on her parted lips.
She bobbed her head, mutely.
Satisfied with her gesture, he pulled his fingers away and placed it on her hand this time. “My feeling for you isn’t a fling.” He paused, studying her face and when she was still in faze listening to what he was saying, he continued. “Before I go to that lane, I want to tell you something.”
Draven stopped what he was doing and looked at her intently. The dark fathomless eyes were compelling and oddly hesitant. All of sudden it was not Draven Knight, the big-shot business man or a charming heartthrob, but simply an unsure boy, full of fire and anxiety and doubt. Seriously, she had never seen him like this. And truthfully even though with big effort she could resist the armor-plated, charming persona, she could not resist something like this.
“Something’s bothering you.” She stated. “What’s the problem?” She asked as if she had a right to invade his privacy. But his stillness acquiesce the brief flare of concern in her eyes.
“I once liked a girl. Very much actually.’ He began, still staring at her as if searching something in her eyes, however even if he could have read her mind or indeed found something, he would not understand. Instead he kept going. “It happened around four years ago. She was one of my employees. We met quite often during meeting and I found something unique about her. I didn’t know what made me attracted to her, all I knew she was special. But she had lack of confidence in her. It was her weakness, honestly, I accepted because it was part of her. When I confronted my feeling to her, she always said that we’re not compatible or we came from different world or others similar things.”
Damn, sounds familiar, Rainie thought but she kept it to herself when she curiously asked. “Why she said something like that?”
Draven shrugged his broad shoulders, smiling bitterly. “Because she thought she wasn’t good enough for me.”
“But did you convince her?” Rainie wondered. Eagerly wanted to know what had he done to convince her. She understood that girl feeling perfectly. Being with Draven Knight could be very overwhelming.
He blew a shaky breath. A flash of pain briefly appeared in his eyes. “I did.”
He held his grip tighter. His eyes looked stricken and he did not say a word. Rainie did not know if he heard her question or he simply was out of this world.
And as his silence threatened to stretch into more of stark quietness, Rainie instinctively lifted her hand, cupping his cheek to meet the dark orbs of stormy emotion, literally holding him prisoner. “Draven, please tell me what happened.” She encouraged in a soft whisper.
Draven’s muscle jumped in his cheek and she became aware that he had to be holding himself severely in check. He then began to speak after another awful moment of quietness. “And it was too late for me to convince her and it was too late for her to believe me.”
“Why?” She asked undertone pulling her hand from his face, noticing that he needed more than just her caress to narrate the story.
He was looking at her again and now she found nothing in his face. Nothing in his eyes. “She passed away.” He eventually said to her with measured tones.
Shock was detonating through her. She closed her mouth with her hand to rein her appall “Oh, Draven.” Rainie gasped totally aghast. Losing someone that was bound to marry another person was hurting enough, she did not know how it felt to lose someone that was taken by fate. “I’m so sorry.” She said weakly. “That’s terrible.”
He nodded. “Yes it was.” For a moment she saw his face was somber and blanched before a mask slid over his chiseled feature and soon he got control again. “Her confidence was getting lower when she got an accident that caused her some scar around her neck. I tried to convince her that I liked her no matter what happened but then…” He shrugged, smiling grimly. “She simply didn’t trust me.”
She stared at him, lost in words. The feeling he had was beyond explanation. Not only that he had lost a woman he had liked but also failed to convince her and brought back her confidence.
“I confided her that she was that worthy in my eyes, however instead that made us closer, she pushed me away. She did not want to see me anymore. She even quitted her job.”
And then what happened?”
He smiled again, a smile of painful reminiscence that made Rainie wanted to wrap her arms round him and kiss him, an overwhelming flood of tenderness consuming her. “She killed herself. The psychiatry told me and her parents that she couldn’t have dealt the pain and the low esteem she had carried since she was a child.”
“That’s horrible.” She said softly. “I’m so sorry to hear that. I mean for a young girl who had to end up her life like that.” She could not keep the sad, pity note out of her voice and he absolutely did not like that. He didn’t need to hear her pity from her. And she was sure that it was a very good reason that he had told her this sad story. Perhaps he saw the similarity between her and that girl. What a pathetic woman, she was then in his eyes.
Draven shrugged. “Yes but she made that choice. I couldn’t do anything to stop her, no matter how much I wanted to try. Though sometimes I had to blame myself.”
Rainie frowned the words issued by him and grim tone. “Why?”
“I forced my will to her. I wanted her to see that I genuinely liked her. I sincerely wanted her to get her confidence but it turned out to be totally an opposite.”
“It wasn’t your fault. “ She said woefully at his unfortunate erstwhile experience.
“It didn’t lose the fact that I participated of her decision.” Another conflicting emotion flashed through him as if he articulated the thought and neither was welcome. “But it was a long time ago. And I’ve learnt my lesson.”
Taking his hand in her, she said to him. “At least you know that.”
“Oh yeah.” He agreed but she could sense that the experience bothered him greatly. The tragedy of this girl was still at the heart of his. How could it not be? How did any man get past the guilt that she knew gnawed him?
Sorrow and empathy welled up inside her.
Then again what could she do to comfort him? She did not have a power to ease his pain. Of course, it was a good thing that he had told her the dark part of his life, and yet there was nothing she could do.
Well, almost nothing, she immersed. Did not apprehend what her body was doing, Rainie rose up on her feet and run her palms over his jaw. “I’m really sorry to hear that sad story, but really it wasn’t your fault.”
He did not say anything and while she stared at his bent head, he placed a kiss on her palm and then he tilted his head to rub his cheek against one of her hand, like a big jungle cat seeking some consolation. “I think I pushed too hard my will to her.” He said after a while looking up to her. “And I don’t want to do that with you.”
“With me?” She was bewildered.
“The reason I told you the story it’s because I see the similarity.” He said softly, his eyes melted chocolate. “I see you also have lack of confidence also, though it’s not as bad as her. But I won’t make the same mistake again with you.”
“Draven…” She ventured.
“Shh…” He shushed her, before he got to his feet also and pulling her into his embrace. “I don’t know why I’m always attracted to this kind of girl. I’ve to admit that is my weakness I’d take as a positive thing. But I can’t lose you just like I lost her, not by death perhaps but by distance. I already could sense that you want to be away from me the moment this weekend is over. You’ve been repeating the same thing that it’s only for the weekend. Honestly I didn’t know who are you trying to convince, yourself or me? But I’ve to tell you that I can’t afford to lose you.”
She could hardly absorb what he was saying. Did he like her that much, after all? “I don’t understand.” She asked breathlessly, looking down to seek something that could make her focus on anything but his eyes. His words were too good to be true.
“What is it that you don’t understand?” He asked, gently captured her chin and urged her to meet his gaze. “Have I made myself clearly? I want you not only for this weekend. I want to spend time with you. Days and nights. I want to share my daily life just like I want to hear yours. I want to take you to places that both of us enjoy. I want to make love with you on the beach and having a candlelight dinner there even just sharing the burgers.”
His hand slipped at the nape of her neck. His breath mingled with hers. “I want to do crazy things with you, because I’m crazy about you.” He said huskily before kissing her temple.
Oh, my…His kiss there was setting her heart thundering in her ears and Rainie inwardly groaned at her weakness.
Slowly he pulled away but still within his embrace, then he looked at her. His eyes now were focused and steady. “But, I want you to do those things with me when you’re ready. I don’t want to force you. I want you to overcome your emotion, your feeling towards me. I knew the moment I made a move to you, you already withdrew yourself away from me and I kept telling myself that forcing you to realize of my feeling for you wasn’t my choice at all. I want you to see because you want to see. I want you to believe yourself that you’re that worthy and likeable.” He murmured. A tug of smile formed in his lips that bumped up her pulse rate. “And of course very desirable.”
“You should see yourself in the mirror.” She said breathlessly.
“Oh no Mam…”He kissed her nose. “I think you should be the one who is in front of the mirror, especially right now…” He paused, indulging her with his smoldering eyes. “Very alluring, you know that?”
“Hmm…Then should we adore ourselves in front of the mirror right now?” Rainie wrapped her arms around his neck and looked into those glittering, gorgeous orbs.
He took a deep, visible breath, his nostrils flaring slightly. “Oh yes, anytime sweetheart…Anytime…” He said his voice raspy. “You can have me whenever you want me, because simply what I want you too.”
“Alright…” Rainie chuckled and linked her hand to his. “What are we waiting for?” She then led them away to the bathroom.
“Hm….Woman with initiative…I like that.” He eagerly followed her however they were only taking a few steps when suddenly he stopped, causing her to halt too and turned herself around to face him “Rainie?”
She turned around and was confused to see the change in his face. Suddenly the amusement and the teasing had gone and he was deadly serious. His hand traced the contour of her face with exquisite gentleness.
“Promise me.” He said. “Promise me that you consider yourself that you’re worthy, at least in my eyes you’re that worthy. Please promise me you free yourself for being miserable and see me completely just like who I am not see me by the baggage of what I am.”
“Sure.” She promised and smiled tenderly at him.
“Good. Because if you couldn’t, I really don’t know what do and…Rainie?”
Rainie placed her hand on his chest. “What is it?”
He shook his head. “Nothing…”
“You can tell me anything.”
He smiled blissfully at her. “I just want you to know that you have my heart for always.”
She stunned to hear his confession. They stared into each other’s eyes for a long moment. All of a sudden, somehow she felt as if the speech beyond her mind and when she though as an epiphany illuminated her tiny brain, she could only nod and tell him in a whisper. “Yes I know that now.”