Once he laid me down on the bed, he instantly seized my lips and took me in a storm of passionate kisses; our tongues entangled, our breathes mingled, and the taste of his mouth was like a drop of summer dew from a dream.
I skimmed my fingers down from his neck and tugged at the hem of his t-shirt. Getting my signal, he reached back above his head and pulled off his shirt in one swift movement, exposing his ripped physique that still made my head spin like a whirlpool. The sight of him, bare in the moonlight, knocked me off of any breath left in my lungs.
He leaned down on me, claiming my lips again and sliding one hand under my shirt as both my hands took the privilege to explored his body; the rise and dents of his toned abdomen, the firmness of his chest. He moaned into my mouth at my touch but he didn’t stop kissing me.
So quiet. So serene. Just him and me.
With one hand beneath my head as a pillow and securing me in place, his other hand slowly crept up my stomach and cupped my breast. I gasped at the touch and he took that as an opportunity to delve deeper into my mouth.
As his mouth travelled down to my neck and the top of my chest, I felt him pull at the end of my shirt to get more access to my skin.
“Goddammit,” he muttered irritatedly and pulled my shirt off over my head in a quick motion.
Since I was wearing his T-shirt and it was oversized for me, it literally flew out of me without touching my skin and I gasped loudly at the sudden exposure of more skin, “OHHHH MY GOD!!”
Xavier’s eyes went wide too. And I became so conscious of my body and so very embarrassed at my bareness to the point that I even forgot the color of my bra.
Soon enough, Xavier started to giggle funnily, hiding his face in the crook of my neck.
“This is so awkward,” I laughed too and covered my face with both palms, feeling it start to flush.
He chuckled and gently pulled my hands away from my face. “Hey, it’s my first time too you know. I’m just as nervous as you are.”
And then we laughed again.
“Where’s Captain?” Xavier looked around. “I don’t want him to see us doing it.”
We spotted Captain still bunched up on the couch.
“Do you think he’s still sleeping?” I asked.
“I don’t know.” Xavier ran a hand over his head, pushing his hair back. “Captain!”
I started to giggle once again. Nothing in this world had been funnier and more awkward than our first time.
“Captain!!” Xavier called again through his laughter.
Captain stirred and looked up.
“Buddy, privacy please.”
My giggles grew to be more high pitched and Xavier, too, laughed more. It felt like a comedy show.
“Buddy, please. Come on. Cooperation.” Xavier kept chuckling when Captain didn’t move an inch.
Captain made a lazy noise and stepped down from the couch and then he slowly padded towards us.
“No. No. No. Not here. Out the door. Out. Out. I’ll call you back.” Xavier wrapped his arms around me as if he was protecting my honor from his dog.
Without another sound, Captain changed direction, opened the door himself and went out the room.
“Close! Close! Close the door, Captain!!” Xavier shouted behind him and Captain obediently implied, pulling the door behind him to a bang with its hind leg.
“Well.” Xavier looked back at me and I tittered bashfully, becoming body-conscious again and so aware of our half-nakedness.
“Don’t be embarrassed, Alana. It’s just me.” So saying, he stared deep into my eyes as he reached behind my head and opened my hair from the bun I had made while cooking.
I gave a slight nod. He raked his fingers through my hair and planted a loving kiss on my forehead, then my eyes, my left cheek, behind my ear, my neck and then my lips, slowly, languidly and intensely. I felt him frown at the intensity as he sucked in my bottom lip and I molded into his gentle rhythm as my arms once again went around his back, feeling his skin.
He slowly reached behind my back, caressing my skin in the process, and unclasped my bra. With no hesitation, I slipped it out and he yanked it off somewhere on the floor. Bringing his eyes back to me, I was supposed to be nervous and shy, literally burn my cheeks, but when I met his eyes - darkened and flaming in desire - there was no shame. He was feeling as much as I was. With Xavier, I couldn’t feel anything else or less than love.
He skimmed his eyes over my body and bit his lower lip; one of the sexiest gesture in the world. “You’re so beautiful, Alana. So fucking beautiful,” he rasped heavily in a hoarse voice and kissed my shoulder.
He brought his arms around the small of my back and clasped me tight to his bare chest. I gasped and moan at the skin-on-skin contact with the man I’ve loved with all my heart and soul.
He groaned in desire as he buried his face into my neck - inhaling deeply - and as I kissed his shoulder. Our skin felt like they were burning as we shared our warmth. I watched his head descend, leaving open-mouth, wet kisses along my abdomen. Soon I felt him hook his fingers in the band of my pyjama and then the next second, Xavier had peeled off every last bit of my clothing. He pushed down his pyjama too and threw it down on the floor to join the ever growing pile of discarded clothes.
We took our time kissing and touching. Moans after moans and gasps after gasps escaped from my throat as he kissed and touched every inch of my body like he was worshipping me, sparking every nerve and cell. We hadn’t gone any further than kisses and touches, but we were already a breathy mess.
He reached out for his bedside table and fished out a foil-packet from a drawer.
“I kept it for you. Not that I was expecting or anything. I just thought . . .” He laboured with his breath to explain and I pressed a finger to his lips.
“Get over it, Arquette. I understand.” I smiled at him and he smiled back with that heart-stopping smile of his I had fallen in love with.
He tore the foil-packet and rolled the latex on him. Then he came back on top of me, pulling a cover over us. I felt his weight descend heavily on my body.
“Now?” He framed my face with his hands, making me meet his eyes, as he told me.
“Yeah,” I breathed and hook my arms around his neck. I knew this part would hurt but I knew without a shadow of doubt that I was ready and I wanted this with him. Okay, I might have been a bit nervous too.
“Keep looking at me, beautiful. You’ll be alright,” he said and kissed the tip of my nose.
When our bodies touched, both of us gasped and he kissed me again. As he entered me, his eyes never left mine and I felt stronger and more prepared by the second as our gazes hung onto the brimming-love we found in each other’s eyes. The air sparked between us and I marvelled at how I could ever love a man as much. I gave in all I could for him and accepted just as much.
“Okay?” He asked throatily.
I saw his jaws clench and he looked almost pained as he tried to concentrate and not lose control. I bit my bottom lip and gave a nod.
And then in one fluid motion, Xavier filled me full. My eyes shot open wide at the sudden burst of pain, my teeth clenched, and I clung onto him more tightly, my nails digging into his back to brace the pain. Xavier let out a deep groan and he stilled above me, burrowing his face in the crook of my neck; panting heavily.
“I love you,” he said, his heated breath hot against my neck.
“I love you too.”
Time seemed to stop as we stilled for a moment, letting the pain subside. And when it did, I slowly began to roll my hips.
I nodded again. I had no more wind left in my lungs to help me speak. Then, Xavier began to move too; slow at first. Gasp after gasp of pleasure from either of us filled the room as we continued to make love. He never stopped kissing me.
“Ahhh Alana,” Xavier groaned, pressing his forehead against mine and thrusting in deeper in me, “This feels so good. I never thought it would be this . . . Ah fuck.” He pressed his eyelids shut and grunted deeply. “So good.”
“Xavier,” I sighed - strengthening my arms around him - and kissed his neck and shoulders.
There was only one Xavier and he was with me.
Probing his weight on one arm, he hooked the other around the small of my back. My head fell back and I arched my back as he clasped me closer to his body and picked up speed. The sounds that I made in response sounded seemingly foreign and out of the world. I’d never heard them from me before. I was even starting to like the groans of pleasure Xavier made better than his singing; more intense, deeper and stronger.
I encircled my arms around his torso and we clung onto each other with all our might as love and desire took the helm of our love-making. I pressed my cheek onto his shoulders and I’d never felt more protected, secured, wanted and loved. This moment was ours; our moment to love, to feel, to give and take, to live.
“I love you too, Alana. So . . . Damn . . . Much.”
This night was going to take our relationship to another level. This night, we were one; together, feeling the same thing, the same love. There was no barrier between us anymore. We were like shooting across the sky as one soul; never felt more transparent, never felt more right.
Claiming, owning, loving, he took me to the edge with him and I shattered with a scream of his name. He pushed in thrice through my climax and then came too, shattering with a loud groan of contentment and he convulsed above me.
My body bucked beneath him as waves after waves of pleasure coursed through my nerves. My head pressed against the sheet, I scored his back with scratch marks. He marked me with a bite on my chest - just above the swell of my right breast - leaving a hickey.
After his teeth left my skin, I felt him kiss me at that spot and then he looked up at me, crawling up and fighting for breath just as I was. My heart stopped at the sight of his face; the mess of a disheveled hair, the heated glow of his skin in the moonlight and how his thick eyelashes fluttered against my cheek knocked me off the very last breath left in my lungs. He’d never looked more raw and handsome.
“Alana,” he called softly as he closed his eyes and pressed his cheek against mine.
“Xav . . . Xavi . . .” I couldn’t even finish his name by now.
“Xavi. I like Xavi.” His eyes still closed, I felt his lips curled up to a stunning smile and kissed me on my lips.
I ran my fingers through his hair and returned the kiss with every ounce of energy left in me. “I love you, Xavi.”
“I love you too, Mongrel.” He rasped above my lips and then he kissed my nose, my cheeks, my temple and I quietly looked out the glass wall to the silver moon; its light still streaming into the room like those scenes in the world’s greatest romance movies. I smiled at the thought of it.
“Why you gotta be so damn beautiful, Mongrel?” He whispered and I felt his fingers gently caress my cheeks.
I met his gleaming eyes, gazing down on me softly with indescribable love and fondness, and I blushed instantly.
Guess I’ll never stop blushing around him.
He tipped my nose and nestled into my neck, bringing his arms all the way around me and catching his breath in long, deep repetition of inhalation and exhalation.
“Damn, I’ve never been this exhausted before. What just happened?” He glanced up at me with a naughty grin making me laugh at once.