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Hi, My name is Ethan Carter. I was once a child who listens to his parent to make them feel proud of themselves for having a child who’s smart and having an attitude that’s seldom to be seen on other children.
Just so you know, I knew I was never the same as the other boys. Physically? Yes but mentally?? I was never the same as the others.
Time passes. We all know that we as humans will never forever be a toddler. Not just physically but mentally. Even how much we want to stay as we are now, We couldn’t. That’s how we are created. We age. Searching for Immortality is just one of the silliest thing that we humans could do.
Anyways, I first fell in love when I was 10 years old and when I say fall in love, I seriously, sincerely do love that guy. We met and knew each other when we were in 3rd grade. His name is Daniel Chester. We were sitting in a group of 3. I was in the middle while he’s on the right and a girl on my left. I didn’t have any feelings back then until I turned 10. Which is 4th Grade. We were separated since I was assigned to a different class.
It was the first day of school when I saw him standing there talking to his new friends. I starred at him for a while and came to realize that my heart is beating faster and faster and FASTER!
It actually took me days to realize I was actually in love with my friend who was my classmate last year.
Even so, I had experienced some relationship stuff on that age too. The thing is, I was 10 when I dated with a 16 YEARS OLD! I didn’t care actually. Since I’m into guys who are older than me.
But that year didn’t end pretty well actually. My feelings were still intact with Daniel for a while but I still continued with my relationship love exploring. I have to admit my ego is higher than the mountains that you could name in the whole wide world.
I was on 7th grade by the time I finally gave up on him and realising that I never stood a chance to even have a normal relationship with him. So.. It was for my own good to give up. Tho, I had to spend 3 days being classmates again with Daniel. It tortured me a bit but he was transfered into another class which I am relieved. I thank god for helping me with this cruel love journey.
All went great for the time being. I even made a new best friend! Her name is Amber Lynn. We are seriously best friends since like FOREVER!
She never actually tells me about herself since she’s more a secretive kind of person. I never had any suspicions about her since she’s very kind of you ask me.. But that doesn’t mean we don’t take turns cursing each others ass you know! hahaha
Guys seem to be magnetised towards her. I mean every time we had a little chit chat, it’s either about boys having a little crush on her or some guys starts interrupting us while we are having our daily conversation with each other. It kinda pisses me knowing how much guys goes gaga all over her when I’m here looking so unattractive in school. Too be honest tho.. I was kind of a little jealous by it.. hmp.
Every time the jealousy feeling came, My tone of voice changes into a sarcastic tone. Lucky for me, she never actually notice the tone changing. Which is quite annoying if you ask me. I mean like, my intentions was to at least let her know I’m a bit uncomfortable with these guys cutting through our conversation every single day and her talking about boys. I had to listen with anger and jealousy built in me. I was okay with it since I have her back and she has mine.
Time to time, We both kept out secret very well to each other until my sister saw the letter that was given to me by amber on my bedroom. Took it and gave it to the teacher on the next day.
We both then got ear washed by the teacher for a great half an hour. I cried the whole time since she threatened me to tell my parent about my well being.
Guess what? she didn’t. But my sister did. It felt like hell since then but things got a whole lot better in time.
Back to Amber. One day, She came excitedly towards me. Her broad smile shining through every corner of the world! She told me she has a new boyfriend and had been together for sometime now. His name is Keldan Vanzpire.
Things took a turn when Keldan met me. It was all okay until amber broke down a news saying she broke up with keldan. In that same day, Keldan messaged me through facebook also breaking down the same news as amber. As a good citizen I am, I gave him my sincere pity. He continued telling me why they broke up and he actually has fall in love with his ex’s best friend. I was curious by then and A L L O F A S U D D E N..
He asked me out! I was a bit uncomfortable with this and also unbelievable. He told me everything and I had to confirm to Amber about it. I was messaging her everything what Keldan has told me about and j was relieved knowing she was online at the time. She then stopped me in the middle and told me she knew everything. I then told her I was actually feeling a bit uncomfortable as I felt like I ruined the relationship. But I gave it a try.
It didn’t last long really. Amber and I also had a fight with him.
But months later, He died due to cancer. Brain cancer I may add. I did cried knowing he had left us without notice.
But we all know we have to move on or we’ll be stuck in the past and never will be in the future..
On 8th grade, It was unexpected that I had to move into a new school by the reason of transportation problems. It was because my mom decided to work in Australia instead of taking care of her still little boy. My father in the other hand couldn’t drive me to school since he’s much more busy than he was before.
This is when I made new friends and met new classmates. I made an enemy accidentally without any attention to do so. I had a new crush too and I was pretty sure that I’m into him like I used to Daniel. I had a crush on him until I learnt that he had a girlfriend and I did try something and put my plan into motion but then I was still rejected . I felt guilty and shame mixed up together and realize that I should stop chasing him and I did. It hurts but they’re more people out there who could love you like you love them . It’s a great decision to do so anyway.
I kinda just brush it off and decided to just forget what happened this year and focus on tomorrow since it’s my first day of school. I want to sleep early to look fresh on my first day and with a little excitement for tomorrow . well, goodnight..
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