Chapter 18 - Communicating
I sat next to her bed, my eyes scanning her body for the hundredth time in the last fifteen minutes. We were into our fourth day, Doc had set up a drip, coming every morning and night to check all her vitals were still stable. He swears she is just resting, that the beating she endured was pretty intense, and she just needed to recoup her strength.
“Why don’t you try talking to her? It helped you.” I jolted at the sudden voice filling the room.
“Doc said that I just… I don’t know what to say?” He moved into the room, resting against the foot of her bed. Usually, Brutus takes the night shift, but last night, I needed a Jakobe reprieve and came to hide with Ovella - who would have wholly disapproved of my actions.
“I have to head to work, you need to get some rest and let someone else take-over.”
“Brutus and Aja have been swapping with me, and Deon said he’s going to talk to Nevaeh about coming to watch her so I can resume Kitty and Leighton duty. Although, I actually think he wants to pay her, so she is here, and not at the strip joint or her apartment.”
“Of course he does,” Jakobe rolled his eyes, “you care deeply for her.”
I lean forward with my elbows on my knees. “I didn’t get a lot of friends growing up, so I guess you cherish the ones you get now, like Kitty.”
“You still haven’t given me an answer?” I knew it was wrong to leave him hanging like that, especially from what I’ve learned about what an honour it is to be a bikers’ Old Lady’, but I couldn’t give him an answer. I guess I wanted him to tell me he loved me and wanted me as his Old Lady out of love, and not his immediate concern for extra protection. I kept my back to Jakobe and stayed silent, “fine, I’ll see you later.” He left the room without giving me a kiss, I knew this was causing a catastrophic ripple, but I had already lost my heart to him and the sting of him not saying ‘I love you’ ripped hard.
The stupid thing was, why did I need the validation? I know he loves me, I feel it, he proves it continuously, maybe it was just the fact that becoming ‘his’, meant losing the small amount of freedom I had gained. Perhaps it was a mind manipulation of losing my own control, or maybe, it was merely the fact that I become a higher rank, by being ‘his’, and that definitely upped the protection. Whatever my reasons, it was getting to be an exhausting exercise, avoiding a subject is hard work.
Every evening, Kitty would help me bathe Vell, and we’d do pretty hairstyles. Our favourite was making her look like a troll. We would spread her hair around the pillow, I think it kept us from worrying too much. We would really fuzz up her hair before Brutus would come in, take a photo of us, and then he would take the overnight watch of her. Ovella’s light brown locks were beginning to feel better - healthier - but I needed to see those beautiful brown doe eyes of hers. It was time for her to wake up, and as I sat there, in the recliner, I found myself for the first time in a long time, praying.
Praying to whom? I really couldn’t tell you because from what I have seen in my years as a Mafia King’s daughter, proved to me there was no god!
I must have fallen asleep in the chair waiting for her because I could feel my body being lifted and moved, he smelt like grease, kind of like he had been pulling apart an engine. It was him, I could feel it, nobody was blessed with such warmth and unmistakable comfort, the feeling of Sunday roasts and laughing, like a fifties commercial for dishwashing liquid.
What an odd description.
“Vell?” I murmured, “I have to go back to Vell,” I lazily opened my eyes to see him carrying me to his room.
“C’ mon Baby, you need proper rest, she’s being looked after.”
“Don’t be upset with me Jakobe, I hate hurting you.” My stupid sleep-deprived mind was allowing things to fall out my mouth without a proper thought process. Yawning loudly, I leaned into his warmth more.
“I’m not upset, just feeling rejected,” Jakobe admitted as he opened the door.
“I need something from you first; something you are not willing to declare without a doubt yet, and that’s okay, then and only then will I give you an answer.” After placing me on the edge of the bed, he knelt down in between my legs.
“So that’s what’s stopping you?” I finally braved up and connected my eyes fully with his, shrugging sheepishly.
“I may be the daughter of a Mafia Kingpin, but I am still a woman, I still hurt, and I still cry, and even though I have killed seven people, I still feel. I’m fine with the way things are at the moment, the exclusivity is enough for me, for now, but I also don’t want to lose myself in something you’re just not quite sure of. Everything is so unstable for me, this is your room, your club, your president whose permission I have to ask if I’m going further than down the road, your rules, your brothers at risk if we make a mistake, and because it’s all yours, what happens when I’m no longer an interest to you? What happens if you decide you want me gone? You may be all great and ready for it now, but what if Prez decides I can no longer be here?...”
“He’d never do that,” Jakobe interjected.
“Really, Jakobe? Out of everything I just said, that’s the part that you heard?”
“No I-I, no… dammit...” I get up and walk into the bathroom, “wait?”
“Wait for what? For you to figure out your feelings? I never asked you to rush this, you did that on your own, almost as if you’re waiting for me first. I’m one hundred percent sure of my feelings, you have a fear, I don’t know why? And that’s okay, we will get through it if we have too, but I can’t give you what you want until I know for sure we are solid.” I closed the bathroom door and flop into the empty bathtub.
I was exhausted; I’d spent the last two days and last night in that damn recliner. I needed to eat properly, and I needed a decent rest, but the bathtub felt so comfy. Kicking off my shoes and snuggled in.
“Are you fucken kidding me?” My eyes snapped open, only to come face to face with a very angrily handsome man. “I have been talking to you for the last forty-five minutes, did you hear anything I said?”
I recoiled into the tub with a horrified expression on my face, slowly moving my head from side to side. “No, nothing,” I remorsefully admitted.
“Priya...” Jakobe grumbled before standing and turning on the shower. He lifted me out of my makeshift sleeping cot and began to disrobe me. “I can’t worry about you taking care of yourself too, on top of everything else I worry about.”
“No, you need to shower, I’ve got food waiting,” he takes off his clothes while I watch, lustfully.
He picks me up and deposits me inside, taking the washcloth, and Vanilla body wash and begins to lather every inch of my nude form. I kept close tabs on his awakening arousal as he lathers my flesh in soapy suds, Jakobe appears annoyed by his bodies reaction, so naturally, I squirt a small amount of soap into my hand, and when he stood to wash my auburn hair - I seized my opportunity. Sliding up and down, along his thick, long and divinely sculptured hardened cock, he looks at me through unimpressed hooded eyes. I bite my bottom lip sensually, and peer up at him innocently, gripping the base of his cock as best as I could with my left hand, and with the right, I rapidly slipped up and down. Jakobe’s head lulls back, relinquishing those erotic, lusty groans I enjoy so very much - that sound had me creaming between my thighs.
“Priya,” he whispered through pants.
“Fuck you are the sexiest man, I have ever seen,” I purred while fisting his enormous beast.
“Priya,” he grumbled again, capturing my lips with his.
Jakobe spun me around and placed my hands against the tiled wall. “Don’t move those hands Mafia, if you do, I will punish you, do you understand?”
“Yes,” I breathed heavily.
The water pounded down hard upon our heated flesh as his hands trailed my back. Bent over, with my hands splayed against the tiles, his very stiff erection rested atop of my plump behind. I turned my head to observe his action, only to find him with lust-filled orbs, his gaze following where Jakobe’s hands moved, massaging my taut back muscles.
“Don’t move,” he warned again.
“Jakobe,” I whined.
“Shh, patience Princess Mafia.” Jakobe’s large palms cupped my ass cheeks and squeezed, kneading my rounded bum, leaving me to groan delightfully. “Priya, I think I’m addicted to you.”
I couldn’t help but giggle, “big scary biker addicted to little old me?” His thick fingers slid across my saturated folds, jolting me with heavenly pleasure. Jakobe’s holy touch was not just erotic, but welcomed on my pulsing core, especially after a couple of days’ worth of neglect.
“Don’t move those hands,” he warns as his fingertips roamed. “I’m scared I will wake up one day, and you’re gone, did you know that? I’ve done a lot of bad things in my life, and you make me happy - part of me thinks I don’t deserve it - deserve you.”
His admission broke me from my lusting haze. I stood up and turned around to look at him, “do you really think I would do that?” I cupped his cheeks, “I’m not going anywhere until you tell my insubordinate ass to leave, you own everything of me Jakobe...” our lips meshed together in heated, passionate kisses, our tongues dancing together, grinding against one another before I pulled back. “You asked me to trust you with my heart, to keep it safe, I have. My mind, my body, my soul and my heart, belong completely to you and only you, so trust me with yours Jakobe, because you are everything I’ve ever wanted or needed.”
“You are an heiress, and I am an outlaw.”
“Yep. Heiress to a ‘drug’ empire baby, not exactly something you’d wanna be proud of. Do you think one day I want my kids to know I got them their new kicks because I sold extra cocaine? No. I want them to be honoured I’m their mum, not ashamed.”
“What if we had kids? We don’t exactly follow the law here either, would you be ashamed to bring our kids up in this environment?” I almost stopped breathing, hearing him talk of ‘our kids’ sent my heart fluttering.
“You want to have kids with me?”
“Priya,” he warned. Jeez, anyone would think it was a crime to joke.
“It’s different here, you are all family, would I want to bring them up in the headquarters? No. But, having them around the club seems fine to me - look how great Kitty turned out?” Jakobe breathes a sigh of relief, “so you want to have kids with me?” I prodded, arching my brow inquisitively.
“There’s a lot of things I wanna do with you that I never wanted before.” I smirk, assessing whether I should tease him further - but decided against it, “but Priya…” he captures my lips again, this time sensual and slow, feeling my soul with his kiss. Jakobe closes the space between us and whispers in my ear, “you moved your hands.”
My eyes grew wide, but then I grinned, “It was worth it, I think that was the most honest talk we’ve had.” I turned around, resuming my position. I knew he loved me, and now I understood his reluctance to voice it, but he told me without telling me directly that he loved me, and for now - that’s enough… just not enough to say ‘yes’ to being his permanent ‘Old Lady’.
“Baby, I know what you’re thinking...” he continues his light touching of my pussy lips, which had me squirming.
“And what is that?” Jakobe inserted two digits into my quivering hole and rhythmically pumped, I was gasping for air, the intense build up was growing, I loved how he maneuvered me, exceeding any others who had previously defiled my body. His magical caress washed all of their inadequate performances away, and I was simply his, to be played.
“You think you didn’t agree to be mine...” Jakobe picked up the pace, pumping faster. “But you just confirmed you are my Old Lady.” I went to move, to argue with him as the knot in my abdomen throbbed, “don’t move your hands,” he ordered. On the verge of orgasm, he had me wait there, lost to his sexual control, when all of a sudden, he pulled his talented fingers out, and I almost died.
“No!” I screamed.
“I told you…”
“Fuck you Jakobe,” I spat angrily at being left unsatisfied. “This is not how it’s going down.”
“Shh baby, calm yourself. I’m simply teasing, you were right, it was worth you breaking my command for.” Jakobe smiled at me, I was flustered and completely horny, this was not over.