The icepacks help with the swelling of my injuries. However, the pain from the bruises becomes apparent as time goes on. They start to throb if I turn the wrong way or sit in an uncomfortable position. I guess I’d just have to get use to it for the rest of the week now.
My stomach eventually starts to growl and I realise it’s nearing the afternoon. Theo got into the shower quickly so I wondered if he forgot to order food beforehand like he said he would... I hope not. I was dying for sustenance.
I look over my shoulder and see the sun starting to set behind orange tinted clouds. I sit up, impatient, I thought Theo would have a short shower.
However, it’s been a good forty minutes.
Just as I settle back against the pillow on the couch, I hear the shower finally turn off. I bring my knees to my chest, putting the ice packs on the coffee table. I twirl my hair in my finger, waiting. I spend the time thinking about Theo steaming, hot and wet. I close my eyes to picture it and end up smiling thinking about it. The image is so clear in my head... it’s something I wouldn’t mind having all to myself.
However, when I open my eyes, standing just outside my bedroom door, just out of the shower, with a towel wrapped low around his hips, wet lips and an accompanied smirk; is Theo.
I jump at his sudden appearance, shocked uncontrollably.
“W-What are you doing?” I blurt out, trying to sound normal but of course I stutter. I’m just incredibly embarrassed he caught me closing my eyes and smiling to myself like an idiot... and then flinching as if I had been caught day dreaming naughty things.
“Just checking you’re doing what I told you,” he tilts his head to his side.
“Which was...?” I ask, confused.
“Not to leave that damn couch... Wren,” he narrows his eyes at me now, and my own gaze travels towards his V-line and his towel.
So similar to what I imagined... god knows what was underneath.
“I’m starving,” I mutter.
There is a pause... and it’s quite awkward, as he just stares at me, unblinking.
“...excuse me?” he questions my meaning, extremely amused.
My eyes dart up, away from where they shouldn’t have been. My cheeks blush a bright red as I realise my own accidental double meaning.
“I’m starving for food... not... n-not...” I correct myself and trail off... don’t even try to finish that sentence Wren, change the topic!
Argh, I dug myself my own grave.
I should not have stated I was hungry while staring at his towel and what I was hoping was underneath.
I attempt to change the topic.
“And... a-and, excuse you, Theo! Why were you so long in the shower, huh?”
Nice one, Wren. Go ahead and face palm yourself.
Theo purses his lips, trying not to smirk at my evident struggle on how to get out of this situation.
“A Submissive might have needs,” he speaks slowly, as if trying to calm me down, “...but a Dominant has needs too,” Theo states like it’s obvious, shaking his head. He walks back into my bedroom and he completes the sentence, “...and you’re incapacitated at the moment so...”
Did I just hear him right? Again, I am confused. I hated how he was always hard to hear when I really wanted to know what he was saying.
Anyway...his needs? Equalled a long sh –?
Suddenly my cheeks are even more red. Something that should upset me or even gross me out, makes me feel all squirmy.
He really was sexually aroused around me, then? Despite my slightly chubby stomach compared to Cynthia’s flat belly and obvious thigh gap? Well, I had a thigh gap, just like... a few millimetres, not inches.
Sighing to myself, I shuffle along the couch, putting my feet on the ground, making the couch squeak. I’m about to get up and go find a snack. However, I’m exasperated as I hear a swift footed Theo coming out of the room as I try to get off the couch.
I watch, eyeing off my boss as he swiftly jumps over the arm rest; briefs now replacing the towel.
He gracefully slips in between me and the coffee table, literally chest to chest as he grabs my arms.
“Ahem?” I pretend to cough and realise just as he pushes me back down onto the couch...
“Bad, sweet cheeks,” he smirks while he scolds me. I land on my ass and I just end up giving him a funny look.
“Seriously?” I ask.
“I told you to stay on the couch,” Theo reminds me for a third time, “So stay there, before your bruises don’t become an excuse for me to delay teaching you a few things about discipline.”
I bite my lip and grab the couch pillows beneath me, clawing my fingers into the material.
“Do you mean setting out actual rules and like what you... um... need from me? Like... you used my shower,” I slow down as I realise what I just said... Wren, why did you bring this back up again? Idiot!
I sit their, exasperated by my own audacity. I’m feeling awkward by my own words but more so nervous... especially when I dare look up to see the look in Theo’s eye.
Theo opens his mouth to reply but at that moment there is a knock at the door.
I move an inch and –
“No, stay,” Theo puts a hand on my shoulder when I try to jump to my feet.
I simply stare and watch in amusement as he goes to get the food for me... in his briefs.
Thank god he did manage to order something before he had the shower. He knew me well, I liked to eat dinner earlier than most people.
I watch in curiosity as Theo opens the door to find a delivery boy looking extremely wide-eyed at the half naked man before him.
“Pasta... I mean, p-pizza,” the boy rattles off and Theo takes it, thanking him. I’m grinning to myself as Theo shuts the door with a knowing smirk on his face.
He turns to me and shrugs.
“I told you I affect everyone,” Theo humours me and comes over to the coffee table to put the pizza box in front of me. I’m already drooling, I can’t wait to dig in. However, Theo also reaches over a hand to caresses my chin, his thumb running over my bottom lip.
“Wait for me, don’t touch it,” he growls this, seriously, before heading back into my room.
I huff out a breath and try not to roll my eyes.
He was taking this whole ‘do as I say’ business, real seriously now.
Eventually he comes back out wearing just his briefs yet again while I’m sitting patiently watching the pizza box with hungry eyes.
“Can I eat yet?” I ask, annoyed.
“Let me grab plates, sweet cheeks,” Theo is relaxed while I’m starting to feel touchy.
“You going to just wear your briefs?” I ask.
“It’s your punishment, Wren,” he smirks as he comes back over after grabbing two plates, “You ruined my clothes... now I’m wearing minimal clothing... you’re on that couch... and you’re going to start listening to every word I say.”
“Soooo intense –” I try to get on the sarcasm-train, but he cuts me off quickly.
“I can get intense, sweet cheeks, don’t tempt me,” he waltzes over and passes me a plate.
I bite my lip.
I was suddenly curious...
“Was... um... Cynthia your submissive?” I question, randomly.
“No... she wasn’t,” Theo shrugs as he sits back into his couch.
“What?” I didn’t expect that answer from him, “So – you and I, we’re different then. How come?”
“Cynthia was more into controlling things with me, it’s why she helped me start a charity. She didn’t like it if I made decisions that pissed her off without discussing it with her first,” Theo is keen to explain and seems at peace with what happened in his past relationship now. He seemed more than happy to talk about it so I understood.
“Do you think I’m submissive compared to you?” I ask.
“You mean compared to Cynthia,” he smirks as he watches me open the pizza box and grab a slice first. I shrug.
“Does it matter?” I ask.
“Cynthia wants a career, she never wanted kids with me... the irony of this situation now is ridiculous. But my point is... something told me from the start you’re not so much interested in climbing the ranks, being a CEO or being a boss. You even declined my offer for you to be promoted. You want to be a woman more, don’t you, Wren?”
“Ah... um wow? Theo, some women would kill you for saying that,” I smile nervously, confused by his words but wanting to appear confident like I could handle whatever the fuck he was trying to tell me, “Before I ‘agree’ with what you just said, what do you mean?”
Theo grabs some pizza too and eyes it off like he wants a bite but he holds himself back. He wants to explain first.
“If you could choose... between a husband and kids... or a career and being single, what would you choose?” he asks me.
“Ummm... can’t I have both?” I ask aloud, getting the feeling he is truly assessing me in this moment. Working out whether or not his assumptions are true.
“Let me rephrase that. If I happened to give you the opportunity to let me provide for you, in every way... would you be happy with being my submissive only?” he takes a bite of his pizza, his eyes sparkling with curiosity.
“Why would you ask me such broad, stupid questions? I don’t understand,” I also take a hungry bite, feeling defensive because this was getting really personal. This felt too personal after he had pissed me off today. My mind, nevertheless, works quickly to sort through my own true desires. I doubted there was a right or wrong answer with Theo, I knew he just wanted to know the truth. He doesn’t hound me with anymore questions, he just lets me ponder my thoughts, “Um...” I sigh and decide to answer anyway, “I guess deep down, the coolest thing would to meet a billionaire, Christian Grey style, and have everything provided for you and not have to work a day in your life. Have babies. Get to roll around in luxury... doesn’t every woman secretly dream of that?” I wonder out loud.
“No, of course not,” Theo shakes his head, “Some women want to rule businesses, some want to succeed in their profession, some want to have kids and not work, some want to have kids and still work, some hate kids, some women like men, some women like women –”
“I get your point,” I cut him off, narrowing my eyes. As if I didn’t know this stuff already... what was his goal with this discussion?
Theo pauses, eyeing me off and I wonder why he looks so offended.
“You talk when I finish talking, but I’ll let that interruption slide this time – since we’re both learning. I’m learning about what you want, you’re learning about what I want. Tell me Wren, what do you ultimately desire? I’m hoping I’m a potential part of it.”
I try not to smile at his last choice of words by pursing my lips. His words truly do make me happy. But I hated being too vulnerable with him, especially after today, hence I try to hide the smile and I just try to answer.
“Ok... well... I don’t believe in marriage, so you don’t have to marry me,” I speak with a funny tone, trying to sound ridiculous because he was just engaged not long ago and he truly hardly knew me, “However, I do ultimately want a man by my side. I want kids, when I’m a bit older. I want to be happy, really. A job is cool. I’ve never thought about if I prefer to work or not. Hypothetically, if I didn’t work, I’d do yoga, explore healthy habits, probably write a blog or something ...oh and I’ve always wanted a mega platform scratching post for Mr. Fox, like ceiling high. That’s all I really want.”
“Simple things?” Theo summarises everything I’ve said to two words, “No dream house, car, theatre room...?”
“That shit would be cool as, but it’s not my ‘ultimate’ goal. I just want to be happy and fulfilled with what I have,” I start to get pissy, because now I do feel too exposed. Especially after blurting out my desires.
“I can fulfil you, Wren, you can count on that,” Theo smiles at me as he takes another bite of pizza.
Now we both eat, while I try not to over think his subtle meanings... if there was any. He is reclining on the opposite sofa now, just watching me stuff my face while I watch him do the same.
Mr. Fox eventually sprawls out on the carpet and oversees both of us like the mediator.
When the pizza is all gone – we’ve successfully eaten exactly half each.
I plop my plate onto the coffee table and I sit back into my couch and cross my legs, pouting at Theo.
“So, you were trying to get a gauge on my long-term values... because?” I wonder out loud, deciding to prod him. I didn’t think people in early relationships talked about this sort of stuff, anyway, so I wanted to know his purpose.
“Don’t over think,” Theo sits up and leans his elbows on his knees, “It was just a discussion, sweet cheeks... you want to watch a movie or what?”
“Movie?” I ask, suddenly bamboozled by the term.
“It’s Saturday night, we’ve both had a big day. We’ll do a movie, we’ll go to bed, I’ll try not to push you too far on what I want just yet, Ms. Clumsy. Tomorrow, I’ll take you to the new mansion I’m renovating in Toorak and -”
"Why?" I ask.
“Let me finish explaining and you won’t have questions,” Theo growls and I just roll my eyes at him as I sit back into the couch, “Oh, no, sweet cheeks... watch the attitude,” he pauses for a moment to give me a look that spells danger, before giving me some slack and explaining. “I just want to show you, because I think you’ll like it.”
“Ok... fine,” I shrug.
“Did you know play rooms are a real thing?” Theo asks, “My penthouse is too small for one, the mansion though....”
"What?" I literally jump up onto my knees on the couch, kneeling, leaning forward with wide eyes, “Are you serious?”
I just purse my lips as he grabs the remote and flicks on the television...
...wait, was he joking?
Was he being serious?
He doesn’t answer and I’m too scared to ask again.
Eventually he glances back over at me and smirks.
“... you want me to hold you, Wren? Or do you want to die from cold on that couch over there all by your injured lonesome self?” Theo tries to add in some humour, no doubt making sure he hasn’t freaked me out completely.
Embarrassed but grateful for the offer, I stand up and manoeuvre around the coffee table. I wasn’t going to say no. He makes room for me by shuffling back and I crawl onto the couch. I’m able to snuggle my butt up into his hips and he puts an arm around my waist.
“You’re such a little sweetheart, Wren,” he whispers in my ear as he flicks through the channels and there happens to be a movie just starting, a rom-com. He keeps it on that and my heart melts a bit. He was thinking of my needs first.
“I didn’t do anything,” I point out.
“And you didn’t have to,” he leans down and kisses my cheek, making me squirm happily. I look back up at him, embarrassed again, “You don’t have to try, Wren... you just have to be you and I love you, just the way you are.”
“Was that an indirect ‘I love you’?” I blurt out quickly, catching onto those three words in a heart-beat; because for once I didn’t mishear him.
“Maybe yes?” he smirks.
All at once, I’m flooded with emotion.
I didn’t know how to react right. It didn’t sound like a true ‘I love you’. It sounded like a very close declaration of love, though.
All at once, my brain goes into overload.
Duh, Wren, he’s telling you he is falling for you. He isn’t in love with you just yet. How could he with Cynthia fucking up his life this bad for him? Make sure you ask him about why she didn’t want kids and why he was happy to be with someone like that... what if he doesn’t want kids with you? But are you even his girlfriend? You should define these things, fatty, and define your stomach to keep him around. Get fit. Imagine losing this hunky dominant literally spooning you right now... are you dumb? Don’t lose him. Of course, if he’s an asshole, fucking get away from him... but right now? You’re grounding him through the drama, perhaps you can make him happy for life?
“Why are you blushing, sweet cheeks?” he teases, reaching up and pinching one of my cheeks to make it more red. I flinch and look back up at him again, smiling guiltily.
I liked this position; being under him, able to look up into his handsome face and sparkling eyes.
“I’m just – t-thinking,” I stutter, annoyed that it’s like he knew I was overthinking again by the humoured look in his eyes.
“Don’t think too much,” he murmurs, “I’m here to do that for you.”
Oh my gosh, Wren, you shouldn’t have liked him saying that... why did you like him saying that?
The answer hits me out of no where.
I know what he’s doing.
He’s pushing me, prodding me; mentally.
Exactly, Wren! He’s testing you and your limits. How else will he find out what they are? Make sure you put up boundaries you don’t want him to cross.
Hmmm... what were my boundaries?
I had to work it out.
He’d test me again tomorrow, no doubt.
I eventually sink back against him and relax more into his hold.
Mr. Fox watches me with a flicking tail, as if he is jealous he isn’t getting any hugs. I just poke my tongue out at him and he lays his head on his paws, stretching onto his back as if to say he doesn’t care.
“I know you care, Mr. Fox, you can’t hide it,” I talk to him, freeze and then look at Theo guiltily.
Luckily, Theo doesn’t even question it, or perhaps he just chooses to ignore it. He’s watching the movie. I bite my lip nervously and relax once more.
All in a matter of hours, my heart had been broken and pieced back together again; with some words, ice packs and a gentle arm around my waist.
I could feel myself forgiving him.
And after his hurtful words I overheard him speak today?
I just hoped I wouldn’t regret giving in this quickly.
I wore my heart on my sleeve, often uncontrollably.
I didn’t want him to break my heart again.
Because if there is a next time?
It might be permanent.