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Chapter XII


Kason and I moved into our house a few days ago and finished packing right before our parents came into town. Since I was getting later into my pregnancy, my parents and Kason’s mother were coming to stay with us. There were four bedrooms upstairs with a bathroom in each room. Downstairs there was my office, laundry room and Kason’s man cave. There was another room that we planned to turn into a play room for the babies when they got older.

“It’s beautiful guys.”

“Is that a grill I see in the backyard?” My dad asked in awe.

“Yes sir it is, would you like to check it out?”

“Lead the way son.”

“While the men are outside Amara show us the rest of this beautiful house.”

“Okay, I’m thinking we start upstairs then end outside with the backyard.”

“Your house, your tour.” My mom said with a shrug. I nodded my head and we all went upstairs.

“This is our bedroom, right across the hall from the nursery.”

“After seeing your bathroom I’m going to have to convince your dad to remodel the house again. I want a shower like that. And don’t get me started on your closet.” My mom said with a smile.

“Let’s look at the nursery.”

“These chairs are comfortable. I’ll have to make visits to see my grandchildren more often.” I rolled my eyes at our mothers antics and continued to show them the other rooms of the house.

“And next are you guys rooms. Each has its own bathroom and are not to far from the nursery.”

“That’s it we are moving to California, right Alice.” Kason’s mom said getting comfortable on the couch that was in her room.

“I’m with you Kathleen.” My mom said with a laugh sitting next to her.

“No we agreed that you guys would stay with us until the babies were born then leave after a few weeks.”

“But you two need our advice and you’re having two babies. You’ll need the extra help.” my mom said trying to reason with me.

“Mom, Kason and I are capable of taking care of our children. We may not get it right the first time or do it as good as you guys would but we’ll do it. We need you guys to help for the first few weeks while we adjust to parenthood.”

“She’s got a point, but still these are our first grandchildren.” They both hugged me and we all went downstairs to finish up the tour and meet up with the guys on the patio.

“We’ve been here for only an hour and you two have already put the grill to use.”

“We were thinking about you guys, I knew you’d be hungry after all that walking and talking.” Kason said helping me sit down in a chair. The rest of the evening we spent talking with our parents and enjoying their company.

“I can’t believe my mother is actually dating.”

“She’s a woman with needs Kace. She’s been dating for awhile and feels like this guy is worth introducing you to.”

“She doesn’t need to date, she has grandchildren to keep her occupied.”

“You should be happy that your mother has someone to take care of her now. What’s bothering you babe?“I asked massaging his scalp while his head rested on my chest.

“I don’t know, when my dad left I had to be the man of the house. I’ve always been there to take care of us even though she didn’t want me to take care of her I did. Because I saw how she was struggling at times and felt like I owed it to her to do my part. She didn’t like what I did to help out when she asked but stopped asking. Kicked me out a few times when I got into trouble but she still let me back in. After I got arrested one to many times for fighting she gave me an ultimatum. Leave and don’t come back or find something to help control my anger. She introduced me to Leo who trained me to control my anger through boxing. Got my ass handed to me a few times because I thought I was hot shit. But I followed his advice and was able to making fighting my profession. If she has someone else, she won’t need me anymore.”

“You’re her son, she will always need you Kason.”

“It’s still weird that she’s actually going to introduce me to a guys she’s dating. I guess it makes sense because she talked to me about my father before the wedding.”

“This is the most you’ve talked about your dad with me.”

“There isn’t much to say about him. He left and only tried to contact me when he wants money.”

“Yes there is your shoulders tensed up.”

“Can we drop this subject Amara? I’m not in the mood to talk about that man.”

“Kace I’m your wife, you’re supposed to tell me things. You can’t keep walking around holding in whatever emotions you have towards your father.”

“Not if I don’t want to, I’m going to the gym I’ll see you later.” He grabbed his gym bag and left out of the room. I sat down on the couch trying to figure out where I went wrong in the conversation to make him so upset. There was a knock at the door, I went to open it to see that it was Kason’s mom.

“There’s only one reason my son leaves with that look on his face.”

“I shouldn’t have pushed him to talk about it, those wounds seem to still be fresh in his mind.”

“Amara you did nothing wrong, you were trying to be a good wife and that’s all you can do. Kason will tell you, give him some time. Talking about his father brings up a lot of baggage he’s not ready to unpack.”

“Thank you mama Miller.”

“You’re welcome, get some sleep and stop worrying about my hard headed son.” I finished getting ready for bed after she left. I fell asleep the minute I got comfortable in bed until a few hours Kason got into bed next to me. He tried to wrap his arms around me but I pushed him away.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you.” He said turning on the lamp on his side of the bed.

“It’s okay, but next time I’m going to get your mother on you. I’m sorry to for pushing the subject.”

“It’s fine, you’re right I shouldn’t keep things from you but there are some things I don’t want you to know about my past. But I will tell you about my father, he left when I was five.” He turned to lay on his back then helped me sit up so that I could be comfortable while I listened.

“I remember the day he left. It was when I went over to a friends house for a sleepover. He promised that we’d spend the next weekend watching the big fight together. When I came home the next morning he wasn’t there, I waited all day for him to come home and he never did. Mom said he was away on a business trip but I was smart enough to catch on that he’d left us. They’d been arguing for awhile and didn’t think I noticed the tension. I knew something was wrong between them but I didn’t think it was that bad for him to leave. As I got older I realized I looked like him and hated it, which is why I started to get tattoos to not look like him. And to also hide some old wounds that I’d acquired during my temperamental stage.

He came to one of my fights a few years ago. I didn’t know who he was at first because it’s been years since I saw him but when I looked in his eyes I knew it was him. He wanted to talk before the fight but I didn’t want to. That was when I ran into you at the bar. I told him my girlfriend needed my attention and that if he wanted to talk me he would’ve came back sooner. Not when I was a big shot boxer. In some crazy way you managed to help me control my anger and I didn’t even know your name. It was something about your smile that made me calm down and refocus. I admit, at first I was going to fuck you senseless to blow off some steam but I knew you deserved more than a quick fuck.”

“Thank you for telling me.”

I feel better talking to you about him, thank you for listening.”

“I’m your wife, I’m supposed to listen to you and love you no matter what. I love you to much to leave you for whatever happened in your past. I can’t change your past and I would want to because it made you into the man that I love. I want you to trust me enough one day to tell me everything. But I understand that you’re not ready yet and won’t push you to do something you’re not ready to do.”

“How’d I get so lucky to have you as my wife?”

“I don’t know, but I’m pretty sure I’m the lucky one.”

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