A dialogue of love
He walked beside her, silently. Once or twice over the course of their short journey he would look down into her eyes as she looked up into his, and he would feel that, in those moments, their thoughts were shared. Then they would both look ahead and their thoughts would be separated, but close. As he often did when on these walks, he spoke to her in whispered tones. Not a conversation, but simple declarations of love repeated so often that they had become a mantra.
'I love you. I have always loved you, from the moment we first met. I don’t think I have ever loved someone the way I love you. I will always love you. I don’t know what I would do without you.'
He never listened as he spoke these words, and he suspected that neither did she, but saying them was important. It was part of their relationship. He had a strong romantic nature, and it compelled him to breathe these words in her ear at any opportunity. But his logical side was equally strong, and was just as compelled to point out the flaws in each statement. One part of him - his Romance - was happy to say these words, to believe them, but another - his Logic - wanted to analyse them, to pick them apart and strip them down to their literal meaning. These internal arguments would happen often, and although Romance would speak the words, Logic was never truly silenced.
'I love you.' He did, although when he thought about it, he really didn’t know exactly what that meant. Loving someone was almost certainly a more intense form of liking someone. But beyond that it was hard to quantify. Logic demanded that quantification, but was never rewarded with Romance’s definition of love.
'I have always loved you, from the moment we first met.' This was quite clearly not true, and in reality neither he nor she believed it. For a start, when they had first met, she was going out with some guy, and it wasn’t until a year or so later that they met up again at the housewarming party of a mutual friend. He wasn’t sure, at that second meeting, if she was still going out with the same guy, or someone else, or even if she was single. He was, however, pretty sure that she was coming on to him, and that was, for that evening at least, enough for him.
'I don’t think I have ever loved someone the way I love you.' This was something that Romance truly believed, but Logic was quick to deny. Of course he had felt this way before. Georgia, his first girlfriend, threw him so deeply in love that he didn’t eat for a week. And when she dumped him he didn’t eat for two weeks. He had lived with Fiona for 8 months, so he was fairly certain there had been at least some semblance of love. Romance would insist that those were different and this is the “real thing.” But Logic would simply point out that if Romance couldn’t provide a quantifiable definition of the term love, then it would be difficult to establish that one love is different from another, let alone prove that one is more intense.
'I will always love you.' He knew that it was entirely possible that these feelings would pass, although it was hard, even for Logic, to see how they would pass easily. Any process that would involve losing these feelings, either through a break up or death, would be a painful one, and one that he wished to avoid at all costs.
'I don’t know what I would do without you.' Mope around for a bit, swear off meeting anyone ever again and then, eventually find someone else. He had never been single for long in his adult life and he suspected that if the relationship did end, chances are he would find someone else to have these feelings for.
'I really do love you. I’ve loved you since we met. I always will. I’ve never loved someone like I love you. I would be lost without you.' He whispered the words a second time as they walked back from the waterfront and approached their car.
She looked back up at him and gave the response that always reminded Logic why he loved her so much. 'You are so full of shit.'
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