Chapter 3 ~ Memories
I had been home a week and things were looking up. I had survived my first DAA meeting, which wasn’t so bad, no one I knew was there, so that was a bonus and I had slipped back into farm life like it was a familiar comfy shoe. My sister still hated me but Kaeron, he and I were joined at the hip again and that alone made my heart sing, I had forgotten just how much fun he was.
What I couldn’t swallow though, was the constant evil looks I got walking beside him. Jealous, thirsty, easy women, desperation drenched in perfume, all wanting to get their filthy hands on my little brother, thinking I was obviously his current lay.
Jesus this town had gone bat-shit crazy since I left.
Kae and I stood in line at the grocery store - Mama had sent us to collect some things for our upcoming cookout Saturday - when the entrance doors opened and in walked, Pierce Tyler. Like a god parting air, he moved fluidly with unwavering confidence and masculinity that had my inner walls not only contracting but moistening with lustful appreciation.
I was almost certain it was him. He had filled out since high school, I mean he was gorgeous back then, but now… wow. At a guess, he would have been around my brother’s height, massive solid frame, his black Stetson cowboy hat, tipped just right, his white shirt tucked into his black denim jeans with a shiny silver buckle and black heeled cowboy boots. He was most definitely a fantasy come to life and sent shivers running up and down my spine as my knees weakened.
His head looked up and happened to catch me, scrutinizing him with avid admiration. His divine cognac-brown eyes locked on my deep greens that lasciviously burned with flickers of heady flame.
“Kaeron,” his modulated and smoky voice licked at my eardrums seductively and my body quivered from the hypnotic tone.
“Pierce, how are ya?” They shook hands politely, all while I shamelessly devoured his body. He had certainty changed from that shy band geek that walked the halls with his band friends.
I remember how my asshole friends would pick on him and belittle all of them for being different. The sudden memory had my head hang in shame. While I never participated in the ridicule; I never said anything to stop it either, which was just as, if not, worse. I should have been able to stick up for them but I had no guts back then. “You remember my older sister, don’t you? Avaleria?”
I rolled my eyes, “older by eleven months.”
“Older is older,” he retorted, throwing his hands up in defence. I focused my attention back on the sinfully sexy, Pierce.
“Hey,” I swallowed the lump in my throat.
“Hey,” he just nodded before saying farewell to my brother and walked away. I don’t know what I was expecting, but being snubbed? Wasn’t exactly it. I had thought I was always nice to him, guess he thought otherwise.
“Hmm, I thought you guys were in the same grade?” Kae commented as I pried my eyes away from his retreating, broad back.
“Same grade, not the same group,” I snipped out, feeling kind of irritated, yet, I had no idea why I felt the way I did? Guess, now that he had grown all- Adonis attractive - so had his ego.
“Kaeron, you sexy hunk.” A shrill, nasally, stentorian voice ground against my bones, “oh look, it’s that weak naïve bitch.”
“Fuck off, Ivy.” Kae warned as her bitches cackled like hyenas behind her. The same bitches I once presumed were friends.
I turned to see her, Ivy, my once best friend. She used to be gorgeous but now, she looked as though she fell from the ugly tree and was smacked by every branch on the way down. Now that was a tantalizing thought.
The years had not been kind on her, her muffin top hung over her three sizes too small skirt, her midriff singlet had her tits practically falling out and she had a toddler on her hip and a newborn in the trolley, both babies’ completely different skin complexions. Slut. Her pitch black hair and chocolate eyes seemed lifeless and dull, I felt almost sorry for her… almost.
“Kaeron baby, you know you want my pussy.” My mouth fell open; we were in public for Christ sake and in front of children, her children, the bile barely contained at the back of my throat.
“I would never touch you,” Kae spat, urging the worker to scan our items faster as I looked at her in disgust.
“You will, just like Mac did, all while your stupid sister thought he loved her and he was fucking me every chance he got.” I hung my head forward, trying to calm myself from the rage that was building up from within.
“That’s enough!” Pierce Tyler appeared from nowhere, pushing his way through the gathering crowd. “Ivy move along, you’ve caused enough trouble here,” he ordered.
“I’d do anything for you Piercy baby… anything, be the best ‘trouble’ you ever had.” She purred and licked her lips, I felt bile, once again, rising up the back of my throat, how could she be so lewd? “You’re lucky bitch, but you won’t be surrounded by them always, you thought you were all-that in high school, must burn you to know I took everything from you, including Mac.” Ivy spat ferociously, my face displayed abhorrence.
“You know what Ivy? You were nothing then and you're nothing now, hell, you’re not even worth my time.” I looked at her with pity written all over my face.
Kae threw the money at the cashier as I strode out of the supermarket, my mind was immediately consumed by poisonous, crippling memories. All our sleepovers, all our laughter, shared dreams, the lot, since we were god damn toddlers. We had been each other’s favourite people in the world. I had no idea what I had done to her that was so bad, she had to fuck and fall pregnant to my boyfriend at the time. I was not hurt by her words, more embarrassed she had tried to humiliate me so publicly, was the torture from years ago not enough? She got what she wanted, she had Mac. I would never have done that to her, and if the roles were reversed, I would have at least apologised, but I guess she wasn’t capable of that.
Dad was right, I hadn’t dealt with those feelings, just ran away from the both of them.
Tears prickled at the corners of my eyes as I clicked in the belt buckle, “you okay?” Kae questioned concerned, I just nodded, not wanting to talk. How can someone you loved more than life betray you so badly?
We arrived home and I ran straight into the barn, jumping bareback onto my mama’s brown horse and disappearing out into the back paddocks and into the forest land that bordered our family property. I just needed to feel the wind slashing harshly at my face as we bolted as fast as we could.
There was no other feeling like this, in the world and as we galloped through dense thick bushland, for a small time, my chest didn’t hurt from their betrayal upon my soul. I needed a fix, maybe, if I called Toni?… no, no, fuck him, he didn’t even bother to come see me the entire month at the hospital, not to mention the arse wipe left me in the parking lot without pants.
God having all of these memories crash over me at once, saddened my heart beyond belief, all I wanted to do was make it stop, but they wouldn’t and I had nothing to numb them as the consumed my entire being. Everything, everything that happened, every sordid, nasty, horrifying moment crashed over me and I was it's broken victim.
Darla, mama’s horse and I rode for hours, but it wasn’t enough to stop the snippets of my old life coming at me like a bullet train. I felt like a crazy person trying to stop the mental attack. Exhausted by the now subsiding visions, I returned home.
It was close to dark and mama was getting into her truck looking panicked, “Where are you going?” I questioned.
“Daisy won’t answer her phone.”
“Mama look at you, you’re frazzled, you can't drive like that. Write down the address and I’ll go get her.”
“Are in better condition than you right now.” I know her, she gets flustered, than can’t concentrate and becomes clumsy, plus I could do with the distraction. I dismounted Darla and snatched the address before taking off, up the road.
I had been driving for close to twenty minutes when I finally reached the driveway and pulled in. The meadows that surrounded the large white house with a wraparound porch, were beautifully manicured, lush buffalo green that had me envious and wanting to roll in it, like a freshly bathed puppy.
There was a cowboy sitting on the love swing, my eyes darted around in search of Theadasia. “Hey, my names Lyera, is this where Aiden lives? My mama sent me here...”
It wasn’t until I got closer that I realised who the mysterious cowboy was. “What is it with you Jonahson girls finding your way over here?”
“Pierce Tyler? Twice, in one day?” I cursed the heavens for allowing my path to cross with his again. “Humiliation must be my friend today.”
“Avaleria, why are you looking for my brother?”
“Theadasia won’t answer her phone, so mama sent me here. She was mumbling something about Daisy being over an hour late.”
He stood and walked down the porch steps towards me, “he’s probably in the games den, come?” Pierce motioned for me to follow. As we drew nearer to the barn, I could hear music playing loudly, though I wasn’t paying much attention. My focus instead, was captured by Pierce’s broad shoulders, his white shirt not at all disguising the muscles that rippled below the thin material. I bit the inside of my cheek hard, to hold in the moan wanting to escape.
Opening the barn door, we were assaulted by terrible death metal music, it knocked me back into my body dissipating the lust haze from my mind. But, I was not prepared for the sight I was about to see the moment we walked in.
“WHAT THE FUCK?” I heard Pierce scream.
My head darted out from behind him with my hands on his hips to keep myself from tipping over, at the angle I was leaning. “WHAT THE FUCK?” I exclaimed.
“Get the fuck out!” A scrawny boy that looked similar to Pierce Tyler had his hands and lips all over my little fourteen year old sister. Her Caribbean blues meeting my Greens dead on, in a swirl of alarm and perturbation. I felt a rough, large hand, cover my face, closing off my sight in an instant and I was immediately thankful for it.
“GET. OUT. RIGHT. NOW!” I heard him grit out menacingly.
He maneuvred us outside, finally steadying my feet before releasing my sight. I looked up into his cognac browns with confusion and horror. Did that really just happen?
My bottom lip began to tremble before we both burst into laughter. “Well, I wasn’t expecting that,” I giggled, wiping my face with my hands.
“Fuck, I had no idea that’s what they do in there.” He removed his hat and raked his fingertips nervously through his now tousled hair.
We stood there silently with smirks on our faces, just staring at each other. “Thank you… for today,” I finally managed.
“Today?” But then he clicked, with his mouth motioning the ‘o’ of realisation symbol and shrugged, “everyone knows what they did to you.”
I hung my head, embarrassed at the thought of everyone knowing. “Sorry.”
“Sorry?” He spat incredulously, “what are you sorry about?”
“That you stuck up for the town fool.”
“You think what they done was your fault?” I just huffed and shrugged once, thrusting my hands into my pockets. He tilted my chin up with his forefinger and thumb, “this was never your fault, this was always their own selfish, nasty behaviour. Maybe they felt inadequate and because they could never reach your magnificence, they tried to knock you down, to make themselves feel more important?”
“Why would the two people I loved most in the world, hurt me so much, if it wasn’t my fault? Surely I did something horrible to make them seek revenge that badly?”
“Is that what you’ve thought all these years?”
“What else was I meant to think?” I frowned with a shrug.
“You were never like them, I remember when Mac and his mates shoved me into the locker and emptied my backpack over the floor. Instead of walking away laughing like the rest of them, you helped me collect all my things, then apologised for their behaviour. Or when Ivy and her gaggle of bitches thought it was funny to smash our instruments before our school band was due to perform and you ran back to the music room to get the spares…”
“Anyone would have done those…” he cupped my face, causing my mouth to snap shut and my body to involuntarily shiver as his skin touched mine.
“No,” he cut me off with a fierce fire behind his cognac browns, “everyone else laughed at us, walked away from us. You were always good on the inside, everyone knew that, you are special, different, you always shined so bright.” My mouth slightly parted, my breathing quickened and my eyes rapidly switched between his, trying to comprehend his uplifting words. I had never in my life wanted to be kissed so bad, as I did right then, in that moment.
“Where have you been?” I swallowed the hard lump forming in the back of my throat.
“Waiting here, waiting for you to notice me.” My eyes blinked uncontrollably, his words slithering around in my confused mind.
The barn door swung open and banged hard against the side wall, it was obviously pushed open with force, causing us to step apart. A very red, Theadasia, stepped out from behind Aiden and gingerly stepped around mama’s truck and into the passenger’s seat.
I placed my palm on his firm chest, gaining his full attention as my eyes slowly drifted up to meet his, “I always noticed you, I was just a coward.” He moved his arm but before his hand could reach mine, I jumped into the car, leaving his property and the sexy cowboy behind.
The car ride back was awkward, seeing Theadasia, so intimate, in what I presumed was her first kiss, was the least of my concern. I was focusing on Pierce’s words, his sensually encouraging whispers flooding my knickers. Interrupting my burning erotic haze, was embarrassment, seeping off of Daisy.
“Are you going to tell on me?” I looked across at her apathetically.
“Is he your boyfriend?” Secretly, I was more concerned with how awkward dinner would be, if we were both seeing brothers from the same family, not that I was, I just wanted too, even more so now.
“No, we are just friends.”
“Friends?” I stated incredulously, “Friends don’t kiss.”
“We feel safe with each other, we’re just… discovering, we didn’t want to be bad our first, ‘real time’ so we are just practicing,” I nodded hearing every word.
“I'm not going to tell on you.”
“Thank you, Lyera.” I smiled at her, I think this was the first time we had shared a sister moment.
“Ya know, doing that kissing stuff with someone you love, is way better than doing it with just anybody.” I knew that from experience, “when you get older you will understand, waiting for the right person is worth it, but handing yourself to the wrong person? That causes heartache beyond belief.”
“You’re talking about Mac, aren’t you?” I soundlessly scoffed.
“Then again, what do I know? I’m only home because I overdosed on a combination of ecstasy pills, cocaine and weed. That’s how great my decisions were, and now our parents think that I’m a wayward addict and watch me more than you. Do yourself a favour Daisy, wait for the right one to kiss - not anyone.”
*** This chapter had to be altered... so if you're reading further along and something doesn't quite make sense, it's because of this chapter. I will try and make it flow in with the rest of the next few days. <3 ***