The Loudest Silence

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Isabella

The sunlight that bled through the thin blinds glared upon my face as I lay on the thin mattress on the cold floor. Groaning internally, I slung my arm over my eyes as I cowered away from the bright light. I shifted slightly and laid with my back facing away from the window as I shut my eyes tightly.

Letting out a deep sigh, I felt myself once again falling into a deep sleep. Just as I felt myself slipping into the blissful darkness, a loud bang sounded on my door. A series of curses rung outside the door as the person relentlessly pounded on the door.

I shot up suddenly, all sleep drained from me, as my heart pounded harshly in my chest. I held my hand to my heart to calm myself as fear pulsed through my veins.

“Get the hell up you worthless child! If you’re not down here in two minutes, you’ll be sporting new injuries!” His sadistic voice rang out as he yelled from the other side of the door. Jumping up, I quickly slipped on a pair of old ripped jeans and a random shirt. I unlocked my door and rushed down the stairs as I silently prayed he wasn’t anywhere nearby.

I kept my head down as I crept past the living room where he sat on the couch. Masses of beer bottles were spread across the floor along with packets of cigarettes. His back was to me as he spoke on the phone with someone while gulping down a bottle of beer.

I quickly walked into the small rusted kitchen and began searching for food to make. I opened the nearly empty refrigerator and peered inside. A half full carton of milk, 3 eggs, and a few stray pieces of bread. I grabbed the eggs and began cooking them on the old stove that barely worked.

Goosebumps erupted on my skin as I heard him yelling from the living room. I winced as I heard the sound of items meeting the floor as they shattered on the wooden floor. I quickly placed the eggs onto a plate once they were done and filled up a glass of milk. I placed it on the table just as he walked in. He let out a series of curses as he walked over to the small table as he clenched his phone in his hands.

His flannel was dirty and wrinkled, and his faded jeans were stained. A cigarette was perched in between his lips as he sat down on the table. He was still on the phone speaking angrily as he began eating. My stomach growled loudly as the smell of food wafted the room. Knowing that I wouldn’t be eating, I made my way to the sink and began washing the pan and cleaning the dirty dishes. As soon as I finished,I walked out of the kitchen quietly made my way into the living room. I let out a sigh of relief as I made it out without any comments from him. The person who had called obviously came baring bad news seeing that he was distracted and angry.

I glanced around the dirty room and scrunched my nose at the smell that clouded the room. Walking towards the cabinet, I pulled out a trash bag and made my way around the couch. I began picking up the numerous empty beer bottles, and cigarettes and threw them into the bag. Once I was done, I made my way to the trash can in the backyard and threw it out.

I took this time to inhale the smell of fresh air knowing that it may be a while before I could go outside again.

As I made my way back into the house, I bumped into a large belly. I had been so consumed in my thoughts that I hadn’t watched where I was going. Goosebumps once again laid upon my skin as I kept my gaze on my sock clad feet. I barely saw it coming when his large hand raised in the air and met my cheek. I lightly gasped and tears pricked my eyes as I felt a tingly sensation on my now bruised cheek. He roughly grabbed my chin in his hands and forced me to look up at him. Anger was evident in his eyes as he had a murderous look on his face. The smell of alcohol oozed off him in waves as I scrunched my nose at the stench. He held my chin in a painful grip as he roughly pulled me into the house. He slammed the back door shut and threw me on the floor as he towered over me. I let out a hiss of pain as I landed on my injured side.

“How dare you step out of the house without my permission.” He seethed as he glared down at me.

Dread filled me as my eyes widened. He had seen me sneaking out last night.

“Answer me!” He screamed as I shook with fear.

“I-I don’t know what you mean.” I replied as I stared up at him. At my answer, he grew angrier. This time, I saw it coming when he lifted his leg and slammed it into my side.

I let out a cry of pain as I held my side. Tears rolled down my cheeks as my side throbbed.

“Do not lie to me!” He bellowed as I remained quiet. I clenched my fists as I watched him bend down so that he was eye level with me.

His dark eyes peered into mine as he harshly gripped my hair. He tugged it painfully as I bit my lip to keep from screaming.

“If you ever try to sneak out again, you won’t live to see another day.” He spit out menacingly before letting go of my hair and walking out of the room.

I remained frozen on the floor until I heard the slam of the front door, indicating that he was gone. Wiping away my tears, I gripped whatever was closest to me and stood up.

My legs felt like jelly and my whole body ached as I tried my best to remain upright. Pain was all I felt as I limped up the stairs to my bedroom. As soon as I made to my mattress, I collapsed.

Tears once again rolled down my cheeks as I lifted my shirt to see the newly formed bruises on my body. I suddenly felt lightheaded as my head throbbed where he had gripped my hair. I laid down on the lanky mattress and held my knees to my chest as my body shook with silent sobs.

As hard as I tried, I couldn’t stop the small smile from marring my face as I felt the familiar darkness approaching.

Except, the smile wasn’t because I would be falling into unconsciousness soon.

It was a smile for hope.

Hope that maybe, this time I wouldn’t have to wake up again.

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