Sometimes you need to give up on people,
Not because you don’t care,
But because they don’t.
I was anxious and worried for what would’ve happened to Edward. I didn’t mean to be harsh on him, but it was true, I was feeling suffocated with him around all the time. I needed space.
He didn’t show up to any of the classes in the first half, and now it was time for lunch. I hope he is there. Even if he is angry or doesn’t wanna talk to me I can live with it but I have to see him, to know that he’s okay.
Sitting on our usual table, there was Blake with Chris and Amber and Wren, no sign of the other three missing from our little group. I wanted to know what happened so I decided to ask Chris as he was the only one who is to know about his pack members.
“They had some work to do. It was important.” He replied looking at me as if knowing I would know what he’s talking about and surprisingly I did.
The Pack stuff had to be taken care of so the Alpha, Beta and Gamma went to sort it out.
My phone pinged, signaling a text, I looked at it and my eyes almost bulged out of their sockets.
Meet me in the ground. It’s important. Please.~ Adrian.
My heart started to pound in my chest, thinking about all the things that would happen if I go. But the sensible part of my brain suggested that it would be the only time where I can know what he has to say without any interruption and so I listened to it.
Excusing myself from the table, I went out to look for the person who wanted to see me.
I saw him sitting on the bleachers alone while some other students were scattered across the huge field.
He seemed to notice me approaching as he looked at me and stood up, his eyes shining like a kid in the candy shop.
“Hi babe!” He greeted me.
“You don’t get to call me that Adrian. How many times do I have to tell you that?” I scowled at him. He looked at the ground.
“I’m sorry. It’s just a habit.”
“Try to change it. Now, what’s the problem?” I asked, not wanting to stretch the conversation longer than necessary.
“I was hoping if I can talk to you about what happened.” His face turned sad. But something in my mind told me to not fall for this.
“I don’t wanna talk to you. I think I made it pretty clear earlier.” I said, trying my best to not fall for his trick.
“Are you sure? Do you not want me anymore, Ava? Was it so easy for you to move on?” He asked with the same sad expression.
“You have the audacity to ask me that, Adrian?” I told him accusingly, “you left me, you left me when I was on the verge of falling all over for you. You think it was this easy to move on for me? You broke me, Adrian. Not just my heart, but my love too. And now you are here in front of me asking me if it was easy for me to ‘move on’ when you were the one who left me to fend for myself. When you are the sole reason why I have nightmares of being left alone in a dark room as you watch me drift away. So no, it was not easy for me to move on but you left me no choice. It was either forgetting you or to forget myself,” all the rage, all the questions, all the things I wanted to say to him. This is it. This is how I actually move on.
I loved him with everything in me. But the keyword here is loved. This person had all of me, my heart and soul. I gave everything to him and what he did was that he left me with no explanation for his actions.
I Adrian Richards, reject you, Ava Smith as my mate.
That one goddamned sentence ruined everything in my life. It was the last time I saw him, the last time we walked in the park together, the last time we held hands, the last time we hugged each other, the last time we kissed each other. The last time we said I love you to each other. And then this dreadful sentence left his lips and I could see my whole world crashing down in front of my eyes.
Even after all of this I still care for him. Not as much as I used to, but not any less too.
“Why did you come back Adrian? After all this time, why now? Actually, the question should be, why did you leave in the first place?” I asked, my voice cracking by the end. But I held myself together, not wanting to breakdown in front of him.
“I miss you Ava. I never wanted story leave you in the first place, but I had to. There was no other way to leave. Your life was at stake Ava, I couldn’t have dragged you into my mess.” He said.
My life in danger? What the heck is he talking about?
“My life at stake? What do you mean?” I asked, voicing my thoughts.
“It’s pretty complicated. But you have to listen to me. It’s about time you know about it.” He said, nervously and I nodded in understanding.
He motioned for me to sit, and I did, him doing the same.
“Go on.” I said, finally wanting to know everything.
“After I met you, I was on the ninth cloud. I waited for a mate to show up all my life and my wish finally came true when I turned sixteen. As you know I was in your Math because I needed extra credit and also because I hate math. But never did I think I would find my mate.” He said with a distant look on his face, a slight smile on his lips, as if remembering the memory. “You were so beautiful, I loved how your green eyes had a bit of brown specs, if you look closely and your hair like a burning flame, making your way straight to my heart, burning all the walls I built, and in that one glance I was sure I would do anything for you even if it meant to sacrifice my own soul for you.”
He looked at me lovingly and I felt the emotions hit me like a wrecking ball. All the love, adoration, compassion. Everything came to me, but what shocked me was that it was not the same like before. Things changed drastically and I don’t feel the same way about him. Every time I thought about him, I thought that I would go rushing into his arms, forgive him for everything he did and we would live happily ever after, but nothing like that happened. I have changed, I don’t feel the same way about him. I have moved on.
“Then the pack started getting threats from rogues, saying that the pack would be in danger and everything.” He continued, pulling me out of my thoughts. “Our pack members used to come with injuries, and the rogues would attack them one by one. One wolf against 10. And it was not safe for you to visit us anymore, so I had to decide between you by my side or your life, and I chose, I chose to let you go so that you can have a peaceful life. Without me.” He completed, last part as a whisper.
We sat there for a while before he spoke again, “but now everything is under control, no more rogue attacks, no more threats. We can be together, Ava. It could be just like it used to be, you and me together, always and forever. Please Ava, come back to me. I promise there will be no more complications.” He said, I thought about it and realized that I don’t want to be with him anymore. I can’t be and that I belong with someone else. And I can’t be with Adrian anymore.
“Adrian, I loved you with everything in me. My body, my heart, my soul, but I have moved on. If you would’ve told me earlier why you left me, things would’ve been different. I care for you Adrian, I do. God knows I do. But not in the way I used to. As much as it hurts me to say, but I have to say this. I don’t love you anymore, Adrian. I have moved on, so should you.” I said, pouring my heart out to him, tears falling down my face, but they were the tears of happiness, happiness of finally realizing the one and only for me.
“No. Don’t say it like that, Ava. I can’t live without you, please don’t say this. Don’t leave me, I will die.” He said pleading me with his eyes, holding on to my hand, as if to hold on to me.
“I’m sorry Adrian. But you have to let me go. You will find someone else. I know you will. You are the sweetest person I have ever met with, and any other girl would be lucky to have you. But that girl isn’t me. I have to go. For good.” I said, standing up and backing away from him, still seeing the expression his eyes hold.
“Bye, Adrian. Find someone who will love you more than I did. And treat her better than you treated me. She deserves everything in this world, so do you. But you won’t have all of it with me.” I finished with both of our faces wet with tears.
“Ava,” he stopped me, coming close to me, “before you go, I just want to do this, just to know that it’s really over.” He said coming close to me.
Coming closer to me, he leaned in, his hand reaching to cup my face. I don’t know what came over me, but I started leaning too. Maybe to ensure me that I don’t feel the same for him anymore.
His lips came down on mine, meeting me in a sweet, sensual kiss. It felt weird to kiss him. No sparks burst through my skin like they used to, the way he kissed me sweetly now doesn’t ignite any fire inside of me. It’s done, it really is done. I’d intended love him for a long time, but seems like this is it.
Pulling away, his forehead rested on mine with tears running down his face. I have never seen him so broken, never.
“It’s finally over then.” He whispered, with his eyes closed.
I nodded without opening my eyes, “it is. Remember this Adrian, I loved you, but someone will love you even more. You deserve so much better.” I moved away from him, smiling lightly.
“I love you, Ava. I always have and I always will. Remember that.” He says, kissing my forehead.
I nodded and moved back without breaking eye contact. When I reached the end of the row near the stairs I turned away, a slight smile playing on my lips.
Wiping my tears with the back of my hand, I headed inside the school and calling the person, I want to talk to.