“Good morning, Alayna. Breakfast in bed?” Cassius placed a tray of toast and a glass of milk on the bedside table.
I chuckled. “Sure. Thanks, Cass.”
“You’re welcome.” He grinned. “Oh, your complexion is back. I think you’ll be fine in a few days.”
“I can’t thank you for this treatment,” I bit my lip, “and I’m sorry. I’ve been a mess.”
“You’ll be fine. You just need to clear your mind and,” he picked up a piece of the toast and handed it to me, “start fresh, you know? I suggest you eat your breakfast. I’m taking you out later.”
I took a bite of the buttery taste bread. “I thought I’m not allowed to go out?”
He laughed softly. “I didn’t say you’re not allowed to go out. Casey wants to see you. She called me this morning when she found out you’re with me.”
“Oh.” I nodded. “I just realized one thing. I don’t want to meet anyone right now. It’s kind of exhausting.”
“Then, would you rather stay here?”
“Yes, and actually I have one favor to ask you. I know that you won’t allow me, but I think I kind of need this to move forward… to move on.”
“Hmm…” he hummed. “What is it?”
“First of all, I need to thank you for not leaving me last night. I feel safe, and I plan to stay here until I’m ready to go out. But, I really, really need to ask you to take me back to the mansion when I feel better.”
He paused a little before he spoke. “To be honest, you’re not safe in the mansion. You might be thinking of your job, but I think you should go on a vacation. I believe your contract does say that you’re entitled to a sick leave. I’m not saying you are sick, but you should rest more, Alayna.”
“I thought of that, but I want to talk to Brandon. Only then, I can finally move on.”
“No, listen.” He touched my shoulder. “You have to understand that you two need space.”
“I had enough space, Cassius!” I said firmly. “I was away from him for a long time.”
“I know, Alayna, but I really think you should not see Brandon, at least for now. You should go to your hometown and see your family. That’s the best suggestion I can give.”
I heaved a sigh. “I’m sorry, Cassius. I understand that I have this anger issue for a while now. Let me talk to him. I need to know if he still cares for me, or not. I need your help to do that because I really feel like he didn’t want to talk to me.”
“Unfortunately, Brandon is being difficult right now. Not just with you, but with everyone else—”
“Then, are you suggesting that I should break up with him?” I was getting furious again.
“No, I didn’t say that. I talked to him and gave him the chance to make it right, but instead, he didn’t want to, Alayna.”
“Why would you give him a chance anyway? I don’t think you have the right to say that to him because I’m giving all the chance to explain himself to me.” My voice raised. “Can you be honest with me? I know that you’re doing to this because you have your reason. I need you to help me see him and talk to him. You have to understand!”
“I understand you.” He ran his finger through his hair. “Look, Alayna, just eat your breakfast. Eat, and you’ll feel better,” he dismissed.
“No!” I screamed this time and stepped out of the bed. “If you don’t want to take me to him, just let me go!”
“Calm down, Alayna!” he bellowed. “This is the reason why I can’t let you see him. You’re hysterical. You need help, and I’m willing to help you.”
“If you want to help me, then you will let me see him!” I screamed at his face once more, trying to reach his height. “I need to see him! I need to! I need to!”
“Stop!” He grasped my both arms, seizing me. “Don’t do this to yourself.”
He didn’t understand. I needed to move on. I needed to talk to Brandon, and I’m tired of being on the dark side anymore.
“You’re just doing this because you still think that this is a competition between you and Brandon,” I accused. “You think that he’s better and you’re not. Guess what? You will never ever be! You are fucked up just like the rest of us!”
He released me and stepped back. His face confused and defeated. “Alayna, where is this coming from? Can’t you hear yourself right now? You just gave it all away.”
I caught my mouth, realizing that I was on it again. My mood disorder was raising up again. “Oh my God, Cassius!” I gasped. “I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry I said that.”
“I really think you should go back to your hometown and find yourself again. This is not you. Excuse me. I have to go.” Cassius took off his white gown and called for the nurse on the telephone. But I grabbed his hand as he was about to step out of the room
“I’m sorry, Cassius. I don’t know what came to me.”
“That’s enough, Alayna—hmmm—”
I officially lost my goddamn mind. I jumped on him, wrapping my legs around his waist the crushed my lips on his. I tried to make a movement with my mouth to open him up, but his lips were sealed. Cassius grabbed my legs to secure me, but he wasn’t moving. He just stood there with eyes opened. I pulled away first and broke the kiss I initiated.
“I don’t know what the hell was going on with you anymore,” he whispered roughly, looking directly into my eyes. “This is not who you are.” He carefully put me down.
“I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s gotten into me,” I breathed.
He shook his head. “This is not how I wanted this. I can’t betray my cousin even if we know that there is something going on between us.”
“Brandon betrayed me first. I wanted to hear it from his own mouth, and you won’t let me.”
“And you will hear it by kissing me?” he said in a tight voice. “I’ll just pretend that this didn’t happen.”
“He was seeing another woman, Cassius! I saw it with my own eyes.”
“And what you did will make you even? You’re not even sure if he’s seeing another woman, Alayna. You don’t have to do this. I’ll stay with you whenever you needed me, but not this way. Don’t do anything you’ll regret later because this isn’t you.”
I reached for the hem of his shirt and clutched it with my fingers. “Save me, Cassius. I’m letting you now,” I sobbed. “I can’t do this anymore. It just hurt too hurt. I can’t handle myself right now.”
“Brandon’s going to kill me,” he mumbled painfully.
I gazed up at his sapphire eyes. “Then it’s the time when I’ll be the one to save you.”