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Love is Death

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Dominick, Dominick. I swear the name had run through my mind a million times since the accident. I gripped my head in frustration, I could have saved him if I tried harder. The doctor announced his death three hours ago, but I still couldn’t find the strength to leave the hospital chair. Maybe if I just stay here forever I’ll go numb, or maybe I’ll die too. My sleeves were soggy from crying nonstop. I don’t know how much time passed, but suddenly Tasha, my mother, appeared in front of me.

“Sweetheart, please come home. You can’t stay here forever,” my mom whispered gently, squeezing my hand.

I felt the burning behind my eyes, the threat of more tears. “Mom, he’s gone. Dominik is gone.”

“I know it hurts baby, but staying here isn’t going to help anything. Let’s go get some food in you.”

“Okay Mom.” She dragged me out of the hospital. but I barely noticed. Everywhere I looked I saw a memory of Dominick and I floating over the sidewalks, the benches, the tourist traps. Five years of memories replayed through my mind, as I tried to transfer myself to that time once again so I could get my Dominick back. Okay, he wasn’t mine per say, but we were inseparable. I wish I had told him the truth; I would have today if it weren’t for that idiotic accident. I’ve been in “like” with Dominick for three years, but I guess that’s over with now. Stop thinking about it, you’re hurting yourself again. Ugh, it’s like middle school all over again. In eighth grade, the year after I met Dominick and when we actually became friends, I had started to slice my own skin as an attempt to ease my emotional issues. Dominick noticed and he guided me to living a somewhat normal life again. Naturally, such an event caused me to grow attached to Dominick and we stuck together ever since.

“Addy honey, please stop crying. I hate seeing you this way,” my mother cooed. Suddenly I realized my face was wet with tears once again.

“Oh, sorry Mom I hadn’t realized.”

“Honey I know it hurts now, but death is a natural part of life.”

“Then what’s the point of living at all if we’re all going to die!” The car stung with an eerie silence after my little outburst. “I… I’m sorry Mom I didn’t mean to burst out on you like that.”

“It’s alright sweetie, I know.” The rest of the car ride was silent, excluding the low hum of the van’s engine. Great, ruined one more thing today. Stop it! Don’t think like that! Dominick would’ve hated it. Every time I had to use Dominick’s name with past tense a knife punctured another layer of my heart. We pulled up to La Crème Glacée, my favorite ice cream parlor. Curse you mother for knowing what almost always makes me feel better.


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